I'm sorry folks this is going to be a long one so skip over if you want. I was going to name change for this but whats the point, I havent been around for a while, I'm on Mn since last Apri and used to be Mhamai. I'm extremely down at the mo, I'm in my second year training to be a counsellor and am in therapy myself but every day is a struggle.
I've been to my Gp about the option of trying ads but he was against it, that was about a month ago, he did tell me to come back if my mood had not lifted but now I feel utterly out on a limb, I so don't want to sound like I'm playing the violin but I dont have much support in rl
My Mother is dead six years, my father has Alzheimers, my sister suffers with Schizophrenia and my one other sister may as well live on the other side of the world as regards to how close we are.
I do have some friends but of late I feel totally isolated, they seem to be either distant or very immersed in their own woes, God I really don't want to sound like a moaning minny but i feel utterly alone.
I keep thinking tomorrow will be a better day and I'm trying really hard as I have two adorable children but overall I just feel very down and no matter what i do my mood is very low. I'm a lapsed catholic, yes loads of Irish catholic guilt to keep me giong for an eternity.
I'm a single parent and although my financial situation is ok, [I have an ex who supports me but is very controlling] I just feel very lonely, trapped and in despair. I know there are people in worse off situations and I should be grateful, [more catholic guilt]
I just feel so empty and am tired of putting on a brave face. So without this turning into a saga i would really aprreciate any prayers. I say the serenity prayer every night and am just hoping that these horrible low despairing feelings will pass.
My prayers are offered for everyone else here and my apolgies for going on so much. I know I've rambled on a bit and a lot of this could be construed as self pity but I'm speaking as someone who feels spiritually broken.