Graham, Gloria and Gossip! Religion Chat thread (part 4)

[nickelbabe]

I know we've not officially finished the last one, but I wanted to get the link in before we ran out of room!

Everyone welcome - the aim of this thread is to generally chat about church life, or just gossip in general!
You don't have to be a regular church-goer, nor do you have to know what we're going on about!
It's not about debate, it's just about chatting
:)

Have a wonderful party, MHD. I am so glad that you are well enough to enjoy it.

Nickel - I wanted a rara skirt back in the 80s, but decided they were only for the really skinny. My sister had one (and the body to go with it) .

Off to have a girlie evening with some friends tonight. We loosely call it a 'Book Club' (and we do read/discuss a book... for some of the time!) but it's more about meeting up and having a good chat and a glass or two of wine! Have to get up at 6.00 tomorrow to get back to take dd2 to church where she is making her debut as a server. She's very excited. Must remember to check no labels/chewing gum/worse on the bottom of her shoes as she will spend most of the Eucharistic Prayer section kneeling at the front....

Hope it all goes well for your DD tomorrow TUO at checking her shoes!

I had a rara skirt but I was only about 8 at the time. I used to save up all my pocket money/christmas and birthday money to buy clothes and shoes that my Mum wouldn't get for me - Pixie boots, rara skirt, reversible sweatshirt with dogs on it...

Newlark, do you mind me asking where in the SE. I'm essex you see

Good Luck for today TUO and hope you had a brilliant night mhd - you deserve some real relaxation and happiness.

nickel it's a kind of counter melody/ electric guitar riff (but thank you!) that I can't breathe in, not surprisingly since it's written for something that doesn't need breathing.... maybe I should learn to play electric guitar... hmmm... now there's a thought but actually I do not practise the instruments that are already in this house enough so I don't need any further excuses.
Busy day today, hope everyone has a positive Sunday a bit of a chance for some stillness too.

Quick hello from me!

MHD - hope you had a great time celebrating 80s style!

TUO - hope you had a good evening too and all goes well for DD2 this morning!

Hope everyone else is having a good weekend. I'm hoping to get to Church this morning if only DS would hurry up and eat his breakfast and stop spilling his milk!!

Just got back from church and unfortunately wasn't a very positive experience this morning! The first song was in Russian which I don't speak, then DH is away so I was on my own with the three DCs. DD1 was fine and sat with the other children but DD2 (2yo) and DS(4yo) were with me and were not up for sitting still. There was no Sunday school so I ended up standing out at the back for most of it .

I'm sure it'll be better next week

Hope it was better for you all!

Oh Milly , sorry for your experience this morning. I'm impressed you made it there at all tbh!

We did get to church in the end. It was a lovely service with a baby being baptised. DS only went running off twice . I have to say, I'm a bit worried how I'm going to cope on my own with 2! (Big respect to Milly and others that do 2 or more by themselves at church already!)

Bother! Typed a long reply and then MN crashed and I lost it...

Oh well... Just to say that dd did brilliantly and was so happy afterwards... I think if she could she'd have stayed for the next service and done it all over again!

We did have a little nervous giggle when she was introduced as "This is TinyUnheardOf: she's new to boating" , but during the service she was so composed and still. I was very proud; especially when she held the book for the Gospel reading (though she did ruin the effect a teeny bit by very obviously trying to read upside-down over the top...!). Everyone (including both priests and the head server) said she'd done really well. The head server acted as thurifer and sort of steered her around, but next time she will have a better idea of what to do and will need less guidance.

She does smell rather strongly of incense, though!

SES - glad you got there and had a good service.

Milly - respect... three LOs and songs in Russian! Wow!

Well done TinyTUO! Not sure about the smelling of incense though - it makes me sneeze!

Thanks for your encouraging words about church with small DCs. I do struggle with it a bit as the church here is very much that in the service everyone (including toddlers) should behave 'appropriately'. I think it's also compounded by the fact that my fluency in Romanian is still at the stage where I have to actively listen and really concentrate to understand properly and that's impossible while trying to manage the DCs. It's getting better though and will surely be easier as they get older

When my dcs were 4, 2 and 0, I gave up on church temporarily. (The service was 5:30pm on Sunday, which was a working day - dh was rarely there as it generally clashed with meetings and, lasting for an hour and a half as it did, it clashed with food, bath and bed for my LOs.) So a friend with similar-aged dcs and I ran our own Sunday school, usually just for our dcs, although others came from time to time.

It's such a difficult stage, isn't it? When they were 7, 5, 3 and 0 I did go to church, but regularly came away vowing never to go back... I only went so that they would get the impression from early on that this is something that's important. I tried to make it fun for them, too, but that was often no more than theory...!

Different church, different country now - and morning services to enjoy. This morning, the older 3 (8, 6 and 4 now) all went to Sunday school and the 1yo sat happily with her toys next to me. I feel like I'm coming out of the end of a long, long tunnel! Yay!

Oh, was also going to say: presume you have something more nourishing spiritually during the week, Milly - a prayer group, or something? I think those are a lifeline during such seasons of our lives.

Hello- am new here.

Couldn't resist posting as was smiling at TinyUnheardOf's new boatgirl. My older two love a bit of boating if they get the chance. I like sniffing their hair afterwards!

(Hope it's ok me just jumping in like this. A bit about me- I've got four children aged 8, nearly 7, 4 and 2. My husband is in the last year of his curacy, so we're looking for a move hopefully this summer. Church/worship style is, I suppose, high church anglican- bells 'n' smells- but we're also Greenbelters.)

TUO - well done to your DD for her first day as a server. :)

Scary listening to you all talking about having (too many) DCs in the services! So far, DD is a little angel during the service, but then she's 5 weeks old today, and they don't do much at that age, so...
She did start mithering during the anthem yesterday. One of the women at church starting rocking the pram while we were singing - without my permission! - and I couldn't do anything about it, because I was on the other side of the aisle. I was fuming (probably a bit of an over-reaction, but she didn't even bother looking at me in a way to see if it was alright or anything just started rocking her! How does she know she's not one of those that doesn't like sideways rocking? She might have ended up making her scream in the middle of the anthem!
Everyone else asks if they can hold her, etc.
(am aware I sound a little PFB - it's mainly because I don't really like the woman)

That sounds tough, lost . I'm inspired by my friend (the one who covered the shop when I had DD), because she was in the choir with all of hers as newborns. And of course, that meant that she was also there with a baby and 2 older boys (thankfully a creche for the older 2).
It gives me faith that I can cope with it (feeding especially) as she comes with us.
Everyone is being lovely about it - one thing I was worried about was feeding in front of everyone, but I've only had positive comments (and me looking all funny walking around with my cassock half draped around me because the child is making me cold with me having to be naked at the waist! )

and it's surprising how many people don't even notice what we're doing! some have even thought I was just cuddling her asleep.

Welcome to the Thread marmiteandhoney :)
Finally got someone else on my side!
Too many HCers were joining the thread for my liking

Thank you
I feel like I've joined the dark side (have always been on The Other Place aka BC).
I went to watch my six year old singing at evensong last night. He was funny. He's a fidget, and fidgets in time with the music .

awww, bless! At least he fidgets in time with the music - our Junior Choristers can't even manage that, and they're Nine

Attilla - I'm further south than you :)

It's ok when it's just his head going, but then his shoulders start bopping, and I could see his fingers conducting enthusiastically, too! He managed to sing pretty much all of the psalm, though, and didn't disgrace me in the anthem even though it was mostly solo alto and tenor men singing with lots of boy-hanging-about time.

ooh, which anthem? :)

I can't remember off the top of my head. Just off to the toddler service/club. Will see if there are any service sheets hanging around, and get back to you :)

Welcome marmite! What area of the country are you (and where did dh train - nosy emoticon as my dh finished his curacy last year) Hope you find the right next place for you at the right time :)

oooh nickel, re with bf that cold feeling having to lift up tops, I found a way round that (had winter newborns too), wore a v big low cut vest top which could stay tucked into your jeans or leggings or whatever and you just had to pull it down under the boob iyswim when you pull your over top up as it was big enough so that tummy area stays covered and toasty - much better! Give it a go! (does that make sense??)

TUO - aw at tiny! :)

Agreed with all re small ones in church. I remember it being such hard work esp when ds was around 18 months and going through clingy phase, he wouldn't go in the creche without me or dh so one of us always ended up going in with him, we hardly got into a service for around a year I think, dd was better for this but as for all age services at that age - well, aaagh!!! I sympathise muchly with all of you going through it and all I can say is...it does get better - honestly!! And some churches are much better than others at tolerating it and actively welcoming young families, making them feel welcome and having play areas, toy sacks etc - wish they all did this, it's how it should be...but don't get me going!

Really enjoyed my party and had plenty of energy. Soooo happy the IVs have worked so well this time, jsut praying for a continuation - never want to feel that way again - but know I will...however making the most of now.

We're in NE London (the Chelmsford diocese bit). My dh trained at Westcott- where were you?

I agree with vest top under normal top for warmer breastfeeding. Layers is the way to go. Isaac (my older son, who's nearly 7) was a January baby and it was quite a snowy winter. I thought I was going to get frostbitten nipples!

For my sanity, I set up an area at the back of church for services. When we came it was not exactly the most small-child-friendly church, so I'm not able to leave a kids' corner out, but even with the hassle of moving furniture every Sunday morning, it's worth it! I print off colouring sheets off the internet that fit with the readings, and bring playmobil people etc. and set up a 'telling the story' table. I put a rug on the floor with baby toys, and have a craft activity which I get out in the sermon. We light a candle at the intercessions, and have biscuits in the eucharistic prayer :) Sometimes it's just me and Elijah (my youngest- the others are in Sunday school); at other times it gets really well used. I do make sure though that people are aware that I've set the activities up for them to do with their children, and that I'm only in charge of mine.

Nearly three years down the line, and the parishioners will now smile at little ones toddling around rather than tutting .

Nickel- according to the sheet it was: 'Ascribe unto the Lord' by Travers.

That sounds brilliant, marmite (and slightly scarily organised and energetic :) ). Very good too that it's helping to change attitudes...

Are you hoping to stay in London next year? Do you get any say in where you go or are you just sent?

Hi and welcome Marmite! I'm on the smells'n'bells side too!

I didn't start going to church till my two were 8 and 10, so missed out the difficult toddler period. But I have found the church I go to surprisingly (because a lot of people would assume that a cathedral would be stuffy and uptight) open and welcoming. What you've done with your children's corner sounds fab. (You need to look at the thread on here that's called something like 'questions about CofE for the clueless' and be reassuring... I've tried, but don't have enough experience to do it properly!)

DD2 is still buzzing from her boating today, bless her!

Well, some people seem to have the kind of children who'll sit still and quietly look at a book.

Mine don't.

The first few weeks we were here I found it impossible. I had them corralled in a pew, but being outnumbered 4 to 1 (they were a lot younger then) meant that even if I did manage to get one or two quiet and either watching what was going on, or listening, or failing that doing something non-distracting, the others would be squirming their way under the pews, or hitting each other with hassocks, or demanding biscuit time.

Providing 'stuff' for them to do, and space to do it in, meant that I could actually listen to the service and join in with it (I'm good at colouring pictures while singing psalms :) ), and they probably make less of a disturbance now, to be honest.

Yes, I think we'd like to stay this end of the diocese if the right place comes up. Alex (dh) gets a fair bit of say this time- it's much more like 'real world' jobs, rather than the curacy where the bishop says, 'I suggest you go here', and if you say no thanks, bish, he's under no obligation to give you anywhere else.