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Original poster

American XL Bully dog

243 replies

BettyALJF · 08/07/2024 02:27

My ex and I have two sons (7&9) and share them 50/50. His girlfriend has an American XL bully dog that now lives with them. I’ve had reservations about the dog as it’s massive but I can’t stop them having it and know all dogs are different etc. I asked my ex to never leave them unsupervised with the dog, which the boys tell me they are on a morning when they go down for breakfast and their dad and gf stay upstairs and god knows when else. I pick my sons up on Saturday afternoon and the boys tell me that my youngest has been bitten on the ear by the dog on Thursday. My ex didn’t tell me this had happened. Once we are home I look at the bite and it’s pierced the skin. I asked them what happened and he said he got on the sofa and the dog barked at him and got his ear. He said it hurt and bled a lot. They tell me they didn’t go to the drs to get it looked at. Obviously when the skins been broken it can cause an infection, so I ring 111 to ask what to do and they send me to the hospital to get it checked out due to it being a Saturday. The doctor cleans the cut and says they have to report it to the police. I let my ex know all this and he has a go at me saying he didn’t know what I was trying to do and that I should have contacted him to find out what happened. I basically think they’ve not taken him as they are worried what will happen to the dog, therefore not putting our son’s safety first.
Regardless of what happened, it’s pierced the skin and as his father he has a duty of care and he should’ve taken him to the doctors for it to be checked, cleaned and given anti biotics. It may have been an accident, but I don’t want to risk ‘a second offence’ which may be a lot worse next time. I’ve told the police I don’t want the dog in the house when the boys are there, I don’t trust them to put the boys safety first anymore. Would you do the same thing in my situation?

OP posts:
PartayyTyme · 08/07/2024 07:49

Have you reported it to the police?

I would hope the dog will be PTS now if it's a BB and bit a child?

DiscoBeat · 08/07/2024 07:49

As far as the dog is concerned that was just a warning. Make sure there isn't a next time and don't allow them back into the house until the dog is gone.

ShouldhavebeencalledAppollo · 08/07/2024 07:51

I have dogs. My kids were never left along with the dogs. Definitely not left to go downstairs while I stayed in bed.

My kids absolutely wouldn’t be going back to a house with XL bully, especially one that bit them and the father didn’t even bother seeking medical attention. And hadn’t had the dog removed he proved he wasn’t putting the kids interests above the dog.

He has proved he can not put the safety of his children above his girlfriends dog and that’s not ok.

user1984778379202 · 08/07/2024 07:52

It would be negligent of you to send your DC round there while the dog is there. Fortunately you don’t sound for a second like a negligent parent, so don’t stress for a second about keeping them from their dad - you would absolutely be doing the right thing. He’s the one prioritising a dangerous dog over his own sons.

JoJothegerbil · 08/07/2024 07:53

My DC would not be going back to the house until the dog situation is sorted. For me, sorted would be no dog. Your ex sounds irresponsible and clearly can't keep your DC safe.

Reugny · 08/07/2024 07:56

Devilrocknroller · 08/07/2024 04:01

It depends. It might have been a playful no aggressive intent accident from the dog. If that’s the case, I wouldn’t want to put the dog at risk of being put down. But if it was a territorial aggressive thing, that’s different. They need to supervise the dog more if it was a playful accident, but as usual the dog will suffer the consequences for having a bad owner

Are you ok?

The dog has bitten a child.

Any dog of any breed that bites a child should not be around children.

The owners are clearly irresponsible so it's up to the children's other parent to enforce this.

FinalCeleryScheme · 08/07/2024 07:57

TBH I’d want the dog got rid of, whatever sort of dog it was, before the kids could stay there. Biting a child or adult is goodbye dog time.

That it’s an XL Bully just makes it worse.

FancyBiscuitsLevel · 08/07/2024 07:57

I think I’d reply back to your ex that you didn’t need to know from him what had happened, your son was clear it hadnt been looked at by a doctor and you assume ex wasn’t being deliberately neglectful and just didn’t know dog bites that break the skin often need antibiotics due to their diet/teeth can cause infection. Obviously the doctor has to report to the police due to the dog breed, and it would be unreasonable to expect the children to lie to a doctor about what type of dog it is.

Then add that you’ll work with him for alternative access as obviously he won’t want the kids in the same house as the dog because he won’t want the kids in danger like that.

let him reply that you are over reacting or the dog is safe. Don’t answer the phone, make him type it out, take screen shots fast.

Hopefully the police will insist on the dog being destroyed. (Sadly lots of the restrictions on these dogs mean they are under excercised and bored, it’s making them more snappy, I wouldn’t want to be around one even more than before restrictions were put in place.)

WhatToDoNowEh · 08/07/2024 08:01

How dare you spoil his sex life over a silly dog! It’s so loving and was only being friendly!

bollocks to that - he’s a fucking idiot and has
now proven what comes first.

Lifesd · 08/07/2024 08:01

It would be a cold day in hell before my kids went back there. Stand firm for your sons sakes, Christ how could any responsible owner excuse this?! It’s lucky it was minor - next time it won’t be.

Ladyluckinred · 08/07/2024 08:02

OP, I’m sorry but this is an accident wanting to happen if the kids go back. I wouldn’t worry about pissing off your ex or his GF, they sound completely irresponsible! Hope your son’s okay.

Blankscreen · 08/07/2024 08:03

The thought of what could go wrong makes me sick.

The house is that dog's territory and every time your boys visit there they are entering that dog's space.

The reason they didn't take your son to the hospital is because they didn't want to have to explain what had happened.

You are absolutely right in refusing to send you sons there until the dog no longer lives there.

I wouldn't trust the ex saying that they will supervise and they won't be alone with the dog. It probably won't happen and even if he is present I doubt he'd be able to stop the dog anyway.

WestofaCrave · 08/07/2024 08:06

Not a cat's chance in hell would my kids ever wittingly be within a mile of one of those nasty ugly bastard things. I'd never ever forgive myself if something happened to one of them. They all need destroying.

MrsGhastlyCrumb · 08/07/2024 08:07

Wow. I'm crazy about dogs, but this is just crazy full stop. Imagine risking both the children and the dog like that for the sake of a lie in! Please report this to the police now, while the bite is still evident. Absolutely no way whatsoever children should be even entering that house until the dog has gone.

Useruserdoubleuser · 08/07/2024 08:09

Good grief. Your ex is appalling. Anyone would defend you refusing contact until this is sorted.
Why is he even lying in bed while his young children go down and get their own breakfast in the short time he gets to spend with them?

ShesRunningOutTheDoor · 08/07/2024 08:11

Do not send your children back there. Please do not.

MrsGhastlyCrumb · 08/07/2024 08:11

Bananalanacake · 08/07/2024 06:09

If the dog was a Pomeranian would things be better. I also would refuse to send the DC there until the dog is gone, I assume she has the necessary paperwork and all that.

A Pomeranian hardly poses the same physical risk. Also there has been a well documented behavioural issue with one of the biggest bloodlines for this breed, which makes them potentially very dangerous indeed.

My dog is a soppy lurcher, but we are extremely strict with our children about giving her space and picking up on her cues. I don't get the impression these people understand the risks at all.

SagePenguin · 08/07/2024 08:12

Blankscreen · 08/07/2024 08:03

The thought of what could go wrong makes me sick.

The house is that dog's territory and every time your boys visit there they are entering that dog's space.

The reason they didn't take your son to the hospital is because they didn't want to have to explain what had happened.

You are absolutely right in refusing to send you sons there until the dog no longer lives there.

I wouldn't trust the ex saying that they will supervise and they won't be alone with the dog. It probably won't happen and even if he is present I doubt he'd be able to stop the dog anyway.

Yes I'm feeling a bit queasy about this too. Keep your kids away @BettyALJF , and let your ex explain himself in court if necessary

Misthios · 08/07/2024 08:13

a playful no aggressive intent accident from the dog

It's a fecking exrta large pitbull. Playful my arse. How many attacks is it going to take to make people stop apologising for these mutant beasts?

Agree with everyone else - report the attack to the police and tell him he can of course see the children but not at the house with a dangerous animal. Hope your boy is OK.

U53rName · 08/07/2024 08:13

No no no no no no no.
You’ve already reported to the police—well done. Next step: social services. No way would I have my children in that home with that dog 50/50. DC is lucky their ear wasn’t bitten off, to be honest. Those dogs are killing machines. XH and GF can complain all they want—the safety and lives, quite frankly, of D.C. are more important than a GF’s irresponsible (possibly illegal) choice in pet.

TeamPolin · 08/07/2024 08:14

As far as the dog is concerned that was just a warning.

Agree totally with this. Do not let your kids back in the house until it's gone.

LakeTiticaca · 08/07/2024 08:16

I echo the pps. Those children should not be in 10 miles of that house with that dog, given the history of the breed. I would go to jail first. Report to police and show photos of the injury.
A playful nip today could be a fatal attack tomorrow

Reugny · 08/07/2024 08:19

U53rName · 08/07/2024 08:13

No no no no no no no.
You’ve already reported to the police—well done. Next step: social services. No way would I have my children in that home with that dog 50/50. DC is lucky their ear wasn’t bitten off, to be honest. Those dogs are killing machines. XH and GF can complain all they want—the safety and lives, quite frankly, of D.C. are more important than a GF’s irresponsible (possibly illegal) choice in pet.

Why do SS need to be informed by the OP? What powers do they have over dangerous dogs?

Anyway hopefully the boys, like normal children, have told everyone including people at their school of their visit to hospital and the reason why.

ShouldhavebeencalledAppollo · 08/07/2024 08:22

Reugny · 08/07/2024 08:19

Why do SS need to be informed by the OP? What powers do they have over dangerous dogs?

Anyway hopefully the boys, like normal children, have told everyone including people at their school of their visit to hospital and the reason why.

Show quote history

SS isn’t for the dog.

It’s for the fact that the children’s father keeps putting them in a Risky position and didn’t seek medical treatment for a child that needed it, I would presume.

MotherJessAndKittens · 08/07/2024 08:24

Even owners have been mauled to death. Dog would have to be gone before I would let kids back. I would report it to the police too so it keeps paperwork right if the Dad kicks off. At least get their opinion and your rights.