Dog had 'red mist' moment and bit DH, AIBU to think that with training this won't happen again?

[Antalya1]

We are a family with DS17 & DS20. About 4 weeks ago we got a rescue dog, he's about 2 ish and a cross between a shitsu and a yorkshire terrier we think. He's a little thing and has been an absolute joy and has brought a lovely new dynamic to our family.

As I was at home more of less for the first 3 weeks the dog has bonded with me and then next I suppose with DS20, we both have spent a lot of time playing and just generally being loving with him.
DS17 is indifferent and DH has been pretty loving also. We all take responsibility for feeding and walks.

As he was so shy and frightened when we first got him, we allowed him into our bed and he's just sort of stayed there.

When I'm working from home, he cuddles up and spends the day with me.

Over the last 10 days or so, the dog has been growling sometimes at DH, especially when DH comes near me, tries to stroke him, or DH tries to get in bed.

This evening I was sat in bed doing some work and DH came up to the bedroom, the dog started growling at DH so I told DH to pick him up and put him out of the room until he stopped. DH picked him up and the growling got much worse and the dog seemed as though he was going to bite DH, so DH dropped him, the dog sprang at DH and seemed to have a 'red mist' moment, jumping up and bit him, breaking the skin 4 times on his legs and stomach.

We were all really shocked. DH is OK and has been to be checked out but is really shaken and upset and talking about getting rid of the dog.

I'm devasteted, first that the dog who is incredibly loving mostly would do this to DH and also really frightened that DH will insist that we take the dog to a dog and cats home.

I've been in tears tonight thinking about this but I know that if there's a chance that he would do this again then there would be no choice. I've persuaded DH to wait until I can get in touch with a dog behavioural expert tomorrow and I'm pinning my hopes that there is something that they can do...AIBU to think about keeping my dog and that there is something we can do to stop this happening again?

I agree that all this alpha dog pack stuff has been thoroughly discredited - read In Defence of Dogs.

Mine both sleep under my duvet and have no difficulty in knowing who is in charge - I am.

I also agree that telling your husband to pick up the dog was not a good idea. Growling is a warning.

Personally, if I had a dog that bit a human without clear mitigating factors, such as being attacked by the human, I would have that dog destroyed. I would not want to run the risk of a dog attacking anyone else, particularly a child, as the consequences could be death or serious disfigurement.

But if you can't bear to consider that option, you must urgently get professional advice from someone who is not still following old fashioned and discredited theories of dog behaviour.

And keep it away from small children, but that goes without saying for any responsible dog owner.

Seasicksal - it was a jack Russell that killed a baby fairly recently. Even little dogs have very sharp teeth.

While I don't blame the dog at all, I do think the final decision needs to be your DH's. Hopefully he will realise what went wrong and be prepared to work with you to correct the issues but he was the one who was bitten (4 times? That's a lot) and if he's not happy to continue sharing his home with the dog then I wouldn't blame him

Op, did this dog bite multiple times? Because if it did then I think I'd be returning it to the rescue centre. I love dogs, have two of my own, but I wouldn't want to have a dog that attacked family members (or anyone, really) in my home. I wouldn't be able to relax or enjoy owning that dog. You and your DH dealt badly with this situation, and the dog might need a more experienced home.

'Animals are unimportant'. I hate this .

I think this dog has had a rough time but I'm with you, OP, in thinking he deserves a second chance. Get in touch with a good behaviourist and I bet you'll be sorted in a few months. Best of luck.

the dog was growling at your husband and you got your husband to pick him up huge mistake you should have dealt with it and told it off, this is why he got bitten he felt threatened by your husband, I dont think 4 weeks is long enough to trust a rescue dog took mine weeks and weeks to feel secure infact months, first I wouldnt let the dog snuggle up to you all the time let it sit on the floor as well, talk to the rescue you got it from and ask for advice , I dont know what you should do with the dog but i do think the dog warned you it was unhappy

To the dog experts can I ask something?

Would it make a difference if it was just one bite or a sustained attack?

My dsis dog bit her dh last week but it was just the once, she was devastated because my family mostly subscribe to the "if if bites, get rid" school of thought.

I maintain that it was the circumstances and it was just the once. But four bites on leg and stomach sounds infinitely worse!

OP what did you do when the dog attacked?

fwiw our dog bit and was unsecure for a few months after we got him you need to give them space to settle in and speak to a behaviourist

It wouldn't make a difference to me if one bite or sustained attack. I wouldn't want that dog in my home, around my child or her visiting friends.

My staffy has her own crate where she will go for some rest and I keep a very close eye on the chihuahua around children as he reacts badly to teasing as he can't get away so easily.

So I try to avoid putting them in stressful situations where they might think a bite was only way out - but if they did bite, absent any pretty huge mitigation, I would not keep them.

OP - get in touch with the rescue you got him from, they usually work with behaviourists who offer reduced rates for owners of rescue dogs.

If you get no joy there, go to your vet and ask for a referral to a behaviourist as they will know of a properly qualified one.

The only thing anyone on here can do is guess at why your dog reacted how he did and whether it's a trainable issue or not, if you get a full assessment, then you and your DH will know whether it's feasible to keep him and work with him or not.

Hi Luke's new bed came today so do you want that single bed back or should I see if anyone else needs it? I've no room to even store it but it's a shame to throw it cause it's perfect!

OMG!!!! I'm MNing on my phone and accidentally posted a text to my sister

Er. Don't mind me. As you were.

maybe you should have spent the 4 weeks training it instead of babying it.

Why would you pick a dog up at all, let alone a snarling dog. They may be small but its still a dog, not a toy. Why would you let it sleep on your bed??

Your dog thinks it owns you

Yes which is why dogs shouldn't be unsupervised with small children.

But in a house full of adults this type of dog biting is a small issue.

Hahahaha. Don't put the doggie in Luke's bed!

I only got to the point in your post where you say

As he was so shy and frightened when we first got him, we allowed him into our bed and he's just sort of stayed there.

When I'm working from home, he cuddles up and spends the day with me.

And I didn't need a crystal ball to know what was coming next.

This dog didn't just turn, it gave you 10 days of warnings. I actually feel really sorry for this poor little dog.
As been mentioned in a previous post try you tube Victoria Stilwell (I think that's how you spell her name) Its me or the Dog series. If I remember rightly there are at least a couple of episodes that deal directly with a female bonding with the dog or dogs in the household and the dog turning on other family members if they come too close.

Definitely not the dogs fault. Also it is not just rescue dogs that bite.

If it's your fault for not observing the signs then having an animal that will attack like that if you get the signs wrong is not safe for you or for others. Even if you and DH were willing to take the chance it would be irresponsible unless you can be sure every postman, meter reader or visitor is trained to know how to be safe with it.

get in touch with the rescue you got him from, they usually work with behaviourists who offer reduced rates for owners of rescue dogs.

this and if it a dogs trust dog you get free behaviourist advice and support if it wasn't for the behaviourist we wouldnt have stuck it out with our dog who was nipping and biting.

You have a nervous rescue, clearly not a lot of dog understanding and it has fairly predictable cocked up. BUT retrain yourselves, your dog and you will all feel better...I think this type of situation is very avoidable and it is certainly very easy to keep others around your dog safe whilst you are being trained together.

I have had lots of rescues and most with a history of aggression to people or dogs and they have all settled really well. 4 weeks in is nothing, you keep their world small, predictable and limited in choices whilst you instigate feeds/ walks and training then slowly let our animal have more space and choice. For a nervy dog a whole house can be too much...

Good luck with it, dog stuff is simple though not necessarily intuitive but with a decent reward based system you can achieve much

what 34DD said I think that is what i meant when i said put the dog on the floor he sees your bed as his bed and a place of safety your husband intruded on his space you need to be clear to your dog what is yours and what is his,