Invitation says ‘No Presents’

[RetroRay]

Evenin’ all,
My daughter has been invited to her first birthday party. The invitation says ‘No presents’, but I feel a bit mean rocking up with nothing to unwrap at his party.
Would it be rude to turn up with a small gift despite being told not to?
Apologies for the pathetic question. I don’t want to offend the parents if there’s a specific reason they’ve asked for no gifts 😂

Stick a fiver in an envelope .. is usually what no presents means, where I come from..

Yep put some money in a card.

I’d feel really mean too OP, children love opening physical presents, especially young children. It’s such a shame so many adults seem to have forgotten that.

Cash as a child was beyond boring! So glad nobody we know does this, it’s very controlling and I’m certain it’s never the actual child’s idea.

I guess though that cash is the safest compromise to not feel mean or go against the parents’ wishes.

Of course it’s rude to ignore a polite request just because you’re uncomfortable with it! And rude to assume the child is going to be deprived. There are loads of good reasons for not doing presents at a kid’s party - the plastic, the environment, the storage needed at home, maybe the child is going to be spoiled enough by family, maybe they can’t or don’t want to carry it all home, maybe they’ve already got a hundred nerf guns etc.

I would gift something like bath bombs (they dissolve, so won't take up soace at home). I really feel for kids whose parents say no presents. How awful.

I would put £10 in a card.

Just follow the instructions, a card is enough, no money needed either. At least what I would mean if I said it! We tried a few times and only one single family once did just bring a card, others just ignored it and brought a present or gave money so I no longer bother trying! In any case, the children expect presents but it can be over the top, especially if lots of guests. I think sadly sone people avoid parties because of the presents, which is sad, it should be about having fun together, not material stuff!

How old is the child?

I would gift something like bath bombs (they dissolve, so won't take up soace at home). I really feel for kids whose parents say no presents. How awful.

Which part of 'No presents' are you struggling with?
There might be a reason why they asked for no presents.

I'm not struggling with it. I would still give a present. I would be thinking of the kid, not the parents.

He’s 4

Just turn up with a card! Not sure why you’d ignore their request?

Don't take any presents. The birthday child won't notice as they'll be charging around with friends. If it's a large party the parents won't thank you for taking a gift.

I learnt my lessons with my eldest child's first party. Asked for no presents when my younger child had a party. I simply didn't have the storage space for items, I had to keep the excessive presents in the car for weeks.

Give cash.

We got piles of plastic tat which kids didn't really use. I'd rather presents like colouring, bath bombs, clothes, something that gets used up basically. But you can't write that on an invite!

No presents means no presents. It isn't code for cash please. And if it is they should say that.

Put cash in a card but I would also feel bad when it's a 4 year old

But you don’t know the kid. He could get overwhelmed by ‘stuff’. He could have limiting health conditions you aren't aware of. Or he could have fusspot parents. You don’t know, so toe the line.

Is it a whole class party? They probably don’t want their child to be overwhelmed with 30 naff presents to open. Personally I wouldn’t not being a gift, I think the idea of a fiver is fine but I’ve never received it for my kids so I’m not sure it’s really the done thing here. I always try to do consumables for parties at that ages, stickers books, colouring books etc that get used and then they’re done so they don’t accumulate in homes as long as cheap toys.

Honestly 5 or 10 in a card.

The party is the main bit and im sure he will have presents from parents and family

My LB just turned 4 and in the nicest possible way, we’ve ended up with loads of junk we don’t need. Understandably people don’t spend a lot of money on kids friends’ birthdays so you end up with a pile of low value plastic rubbish. He also didn’t even notice the presents on the day, he was so excited to see his friends. We got them all out for him the next day but if we hadn’t he wouldn’t have noticed. Money in a card if you feel inclined, or just a card.

@DeskJotter , a set of bath bombs is pretty crap, and if I'd specified 'No presents', I'd be annoyed if my child had been given them. The message coming across from you would be your wish to give a present trumps everything else.
For all you know the child might have a skin condition that meant that the bath bombs were of no use.

Just do what the invitation asks.

Agree with this. Wish no presents was the norm! Everyone is far too materialistic now.

Don’t put cash in a card either. It’s quite clear.

Who gives a 4 year old a fucking bath bomb? Ridiculous