Do you think it's rude when people don't send thank you cards after a children't party you have been to and given a gift?

[TartWithAHeart]

I do - because I always want to know a) that they received the gift and that it did not get lost in all the confusion and b) that they liked it.

in fact last place we stayed

we bought flowers, 2 bottles prosseco, paid for chinese
I cleaned house, did a load of washing and cleaned out their tumble dryer (don't ask)
and have just sent them first series of House on DVD .. because they don't get House in Eire

I don't send thank you cards if staying at close friends/immediate families houses. I will often email after to say thanks and that we had a good time, and obviously say thanks on leaving.

If I was staying in someone's home I didn't know well, or even going for a meal at someone's house I didn't know well, I would make sure they had a thank you - either email or card/etter, depending on what was most appropriate for that person.

Oh yes, and we always take plenty of wine/beer and often flowers too.

No - tend not to for classmates/friends parties - a verbal thank you is sufficient imo. I do always get the DC's to write and thank relatives though - ours live many miles away, so they can't see them to thank them.

No I dont think it rude, as to be honest it is something I always want to do but never get the chance. I take all the notes of who gave what and then...... well time goes by. I do feel bad usually and try to say a thankyou at the school gates but its just peoples hectic lifestyles I think!!

No! God, I wouldn't know what to do with one if I got one! What a stilted, contrived thing to do after a child's party -I thought they were for middle class Christmases!

I think you should write them/say thank you in person later if the child has opened them after they have gone.

Personally, I find it rude to open presents later. I want to see the look on someone's face if I have bought them a present (and a thank you there and then). Hate the idea that they are all saved up for a big open-all-my-presents session and 'what did we get then' listing (in an Organised Mum diary I would guess ).

you spend £5 - £10 on a present .. as the kids get older you buy in advance, stocking up, and save money and hassle per birthday

I spend about £200 per kids' party and cater in general for about 18 kids

who owes who the thank you note?

Christ no.. it could go on forever.. "thank you for the gift"... "thank you for the thank you note.."..... "thank you for thanking us for the thank you note.."

Just give the present gladly... and move on! Or don't bother.

I quite appreciate a thank you from absent nieces and similar.. a phone call is fine.

well, when I give a present and I don't see The Grand Opening, I imagine a look of delight and awe on the child's face. Sure beats the usually look of avid greed and eventual ennui.

I'm too hassled to notice if I GET thank yous.

But the done thing around here (an ordinary working to middle class state school) is to give them, so we do.

And I did a little photo of dd at the party with a caption "thanks for coming to my party", on the PC for dd to write on the back if she can be *rsed. I only had 2 pieces of paper left and couldn't get out to the shops.

I'd prefer to open presents at the time. But there was no way we could open presents in a cafe at closing time, and how would the one child who didn't bring one have felt?

No. Just another piece of paper that I would have to throw out.

We do make our own little labels with our child's picture on it, the age etc. and wrap it around a Kit Kat or another suitable sized chocolate bar.

Gawd. I couldn't care less.

I send them though, because I know other people care very much...

No it's not rude. Might be if the present was from a close friend or relative that you didn't see on the day but generally the child says thankyou when the present is handed over during the party. I think that's enough.

mummymagic - woudl you really let the child open the presents on the day with other children arriving and all the excitement! I always keep presents until after for DS to open - mainly to avoid tantrums/present wars.

I can see from reading the posts that most people think it's not rude to not send a thnak you card for receiving a pressie from someone.

I still can't help thinking it's a bit rude though - particularly with a child who we don't know so well and have made the effort to go and get a present for them, and when the opportunities for thanking in person are limited.

I know that the thanks it implied in the going away present (and I always give really good useful ones - not cheap tat that breaks in 5 seconds and a bit of squidged cake)but I would feel guilty if I didn't then send a personal thank you for their present.

And DS is always well chuffed when he gets anything in the post addressed to him and likes to know that the child enjoyed the present he gave them.

Yes, very rude not to.

Two lines is enough. "Thank you for the present I really liked it." Just an email is enough. It teaches children good manners.

If we can do it, so can everyone else!