Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Parties/celebrations

Whether you're planning a birthday or a hen do, you'll find plenty of ideas for your celebration on our Party forum.

Original poster

Do you think it's rude when people don't send thank you cards after a children't party you have been to and given a gift?

68 replies

TartWithAHeart · 26/09/2007 16:04

I do - because I always want to know a) that they received the gift and that it did not get lost in all the confusion and b) that they liked it.

OP posts:
Tinker · 26/09/2007 16:05

no

niceglasses · 26/09/2007 16:06

I don't think its rude no - I'm always flabbergasted pple are organised enough to send out thank yous for kids parties. I'm just not that kinda on top of things so it would never strike me as rude.

We had a party last Saturday for a kid in DS2s class......the thank yous were handed out 1st thing Monday. My God.

magnolia74 · 26/09/2007 16:07

god no, I have 5 kids inc a set of twins. last year my twins had about 50 kids between them I really would not be able to write 50 thank you notes.

HuwEdwards · 26/09/2007 16:08

no, don't give a fig (although I do send them) mainly because life is soo busy and I can see how easy it is to overlook/just not bother

Theclosetpagan · 26/09/2007 16:09

I must admit I'd try to make sure Thank You cards went out from my DS.

However, I wouldn't be offended if he didn't get a Thank You note from a child whose party he had been to.

Original poster
TartWithAHeart · 26/09/2007 16:09

Blimey, I can see your point when there are so many children.

OP posts:
fryalot · 26/09/2007 16:10

This is something that I often forget to do tbh. I know I should, I intend to and then something happens and I only seem to remember about it at 3.00 am

meemar · 26/09/2007 16:10

no

Original poster
TartWithAHeart · 26/09/2007 16:12

I always send them, within days of the party. DS can have up to 20 presents, but I still do. I do it on the computer and personalise each one. Perhaps I'm mad.

OP posts:
BonyM · 26/09/2007 16:12

No - but I do think it is rude if the gift is not acknowledged at all ( ie. face to face/phone/email - or even text at a push).

Always did thank you cards until dd1 started going to big parties with nursery and then school friends (ie. up to 20 children, sometimes more). Nobody else did thank-you cards so I stopped as well (eventually!).

Still do them for dd2 (2.5) though as her parties (all two of them have been much much smaller.

LadyMacbeth · 26/09/2007 16:13

I think it's nice to receive a card. But I also wouldn't hold it against someone if they didn't send one. A verbal thank you is sufficient. I would endeavour to thank verbally at least.

MorocconOil · 26/09/2007 16:13

I know it's good manners but I just haven't got time. I always get the DC to send thank-you cards to relatives at christmas though.

Alambil · 26/09/2007 16:14

I'm going to send out thank you cards, whether they be bought notelets or printed from home otherwise, how else will the parents know the parcels were received/appreciated?

DS went to a party last Sunday and I've had nothing - not even a thank you as the present was handed over; just a "put it in THIS bag"... !

Now, THAT was rude!

Marina · 26/09/2007 16:14

I'm with you closetpagan, we do tend to send out thank you cards, because presents do get lost in the melee and aren't opened at the time.
But I accept that not everyone sends cards. Nice to have some sort of acknowledgment though - text, e-mail, quick verbal exchange at school gates

pyjamaqueen · 26/09/2007 16:15

Yes - it's really quick to do a nice thank you card on the computer and change the name of the present for each person.

I agree with BonyM, as long as they say thanks, doesn't matter what format.

Most irritating 'thank you' was when one mother said 'thanks for the gift. He tore the paper off everything and I don't know who gave him what.'

Marina · 26/09/2007 16:16

She was being honest though pyjamaqueen

PestoMonster · 26/09/2007 16:17

I think it's nice when people do do it (and I always make sure the dds do theirs), but I don't expect it. If we get one then I am pleasantly surprised, but I wouldn't think any less of them if we didn't.

majorstress · 26/09/2007 16:21

ok what do I do about the one kid who didn't give a gift - fine with me - but did it actually get lost in the kerfuffle?

Maybe a generic Thanks for coming to my party will do? and covers the worst case too

But she will compare it to the child who was dragged to the shops on the bus instead of attending the first hour of games , to buy a £29.99 encyclopedia. He got there in time for cake, poor kid! Silly mum, I prefer child A's approach, don't you>

Original poster
TartWithAHeart · 26/09/2007 16:28

Even if a child didn't give a gift, i think it is polite to say thank you for coming to my party.

I think it is important to make time to say thanks. It doesn't take that long surely?

OP posts:
robin3 · 26/09/2007 16:28

I think when the kids are old enough to write thank yous they should write and send them. In the early years it adds work for the parents and communicates little to the children but when they're old enough to understand then they should send thank you's and they should write them. It's not much to ask them to do when they've had a party and presents and none of the cost or hassle.

Original poster
TartWithAHeart · 26/09/2007 16:30

And when DS opens his pressies, DH and I make sure we know and he knows who gave him what. He will be 4 next month and still remembers gifts from 2nd birthday - it is about showing people that you care.

OP posts:
newgirl · 27/09/2007 19:08

i said thank you to the mums in person - good excuse to talk about something other than the weather

saves paper too

Gobbledigook · 27/09/2007 19:09

I don't think it's rude. Everyone does it here but I hardly ever do. Ds will say thank you as it's given and I think that's sufficient. I haven't got time to fiff and faff with blardy cards.

Bink · 27/09/2007 19:17

I have a double standard: not rude if other people don't thank me (though a rueful moment of wishing I knew whether present had gone down well); VERY VERY VERY rude if I don't do it.

kinki · 27/09/2007 19:46

Same as Bink. Though I was a little disappointed that ds wasn't thanked for his 'girlfriend's' present who's party he couldn't go to, but who he wanted to deliver a present to. She wasn't in, so we put it through the letterbox with a note (in the summer holidays). We haven't had as much as an acknowledgement from them that they received it. We see them every day. (Yes, it was the right house). This I think is rude.