Thread 39 - Covid Cohort - Our Adult Children Now Post 18

[CinnamonOrangeCremeBrulee]

This is a support thread for our young adults post GCSEs 2020, regardless of their educational setting, and their results ( or life updates for those who went into work or have had results earlier). It is respectfully requested that all are supportive and helpful to each other. If you want to start a debate, e.g state vs private, uni vs employment please don't within this thread.

Some of us have been here since first thread back in yr10, some will be new. Everyone has been friendly and helpful in the past. Everyone is welcome. It is hoped this will continue. We were previously on the secondary board and then further education, now we shall be here in 'Parents of Adult Children' gulp

Our DS/DD may continue down various pathways ( employment, apprenticeships, higher ed). Be warned there might be lots of 'Uni Freshers' chat this time of year. My experience is that everyone is welcomed wherever, whatever their child is doing we have some in work, gap years , apprenticeships etc too. Lots of contributors with different experiences and always sympathy and support to be had !

Thanks for the new list and thread!

Both mine are adults now - feeling a bit lost I think. DD seems so much younger than DS did when he went off to uni, and that was in the pandemic! Think I'm trying to ignore the fact that she is off in 2.5 weeks 🥹

Thanks for the new thread. I'm just catching up with the last one. 2 weeks tomorrow ds2 moves to Sussex. Its fast approaching. He's finishing his full time summer job next Friday. So has a few days to pack. I've asked a hundred times for him to get all his clothes from all round his room into the wash so we can sort what he wants to pack. Plus write down what he needs stationary wise do we can get it and anything else he can think of. Of course he won't do any of it. He says when he's finished his job. But I'm working the Monday, Tues and weds of the week he goes, then we leave thurs early. So not a lot of time. Never mind...I'm not going to get stressed about it. He still hasn't heard from hsbc about the student account. I hope it gets done before he gets his loan.

Bedtime is when I'll miss DS, he tends to spend the evening lounging on our bed because we have a TV with Sky Sports in our room. I come up and potter about for a bit and have a good old chat before I go to bed and he goes off to do whatever (DH and DD are usually downstairs watching telly, we never all watch together, I tend to potter round the house in the evenings or in summer I sit out on the patio till bedtime). It will be strange going up to an empty bedroom. He's off a week on Sunday but we still haven't had moving in times or similar. Luckily it's only 90 mins drive so no overnight stops needed.

@Hattifatteners @scabby1 did your dc sort accommodation and get what they wanted?
Best shopping purchase yesterday was the huge bags from home bargains!!

DD & I left for a last minute holiday on the 19th, so I haven’t been able to keep up with the thread post results day. We got back late last night, and DS, who didn’t come away with us, went to the South of France this morning with a couple of his friends. He is away for a week and as far as I know he hasn’t done anything re preparation for Uni/shopping (but has kindly left me a mountain of washing to do! ).
@NCTDN and @Hattifatteners DS has got his first choice accommodation which is self catering at Hiatt Baker. He is delighted-given that he is the worlds fussiest eater, a catered place would have been tricky. How was about your two? (I’m sorry I haven’t had a chance to catch up on everyone’s news yet). Our paths only crossed briefly before he left for his holiday, so I don’t know whether he has been sent a list of things he needs to bring with him or not. He’s probably expecting me to sort out all his shopping for him whilst he’s away 😬

Thanks for the new fast moving thread and updated lists.

DD has only recently turned 18 so I’m still coming to terms with having an adult. Teenagery is such a good word and something I can’t definitely relate to at the moment. I have the week off and so far just seem to have been doing admin/jobs for the DC which when asked to do anything to help me complete tasks for them seems to be too much like hard work!

@Alsoplayspiccolo thinking of you with 2 leaving home this month, it must be doubly hard.

@icanbewhatiwant DD is still waiting to hear back from HSBC student account application too. Fingers crossed it happens soon.

*can not can’t

Dd is being so teenagery that she’s left the rest of us packing/sorting/moving whilst she meets a boy to explore whether he’s boyfriend material. Why today?!! Her room is a disaster but she’ll do it ‘later’ apparently!

I’m not sure I’ll notice much change when dd is at uni- she’s always out, and she’s just spent about 5/6 weeks of the summer holiday s away, but she’s excellent at keeping in touch and sending me videos and updates! So I’m expecting it will be more of the same once she’s at uni.

Thanks for the new thread @CinnamonOrangeCremeBrulee

I can’t believe how quickly time is going. DS is back from Leeds with a bad cough & terrifying tales….

He turns 19 in a couple of weeks… well & truly an adult (however he wasn’t being adulty when he left his phone in a field at Leeds!)

I'm glad I'm not the only one with a teenagery adult refusing to sort their room 😅

Mine needs a deadline to do stuff apparently, she has started. I am going to redecorate while she is gone as she shares with her sister so they have a lot of stuff.

I really want to use her room as my office so I'm not at the Kitchen table when I work from home..is that bad lol?

Also my sisters can come and stay .....but not whilst there is do much clutter . I'm sure will have to get the carpet cleaned...make up smudges everywhere.

Wow, the thread has moved onwards and upwards!

While dd unsurprisingly crashed and burned in her A-levels after not attending school for the whole of year 13, we are moving towards the future step by step. She has finally decided to pursue an ADHD diagnosis, and booked a driving lesson!

And, for her third positive step, she's going to cook us a vegan meal every Monday.

@Alsoplayspiccolo We have finally ordered the Mac for DD today, despite dire lead times that they suggested we have a delivery date of 14th Sept with Remtek

@NCTDN Yes. DD will be at Goldney Hall, self catering. I think it was one of her top choices. What about yours?

That sounds like a great plan @ZittiEBuoni - I particularly like the vegan cooking part of it.

Admin central here too - I got home from work half an hour ago having picked DD up from her college enrolment and looked at her timetable I remembered we need to get her a railcard as the offer on Martin Lewis expires tonight so just done that. Also transferred payments on DS’s hockey club from my card to his so he can pay his own club fees from now on (I’ll pay the membership, he can pay match fees and any extras).

I have earmarked DS’s bedroom for my brand new Lakeland heated airer in a bid to use the tumble dryer as little as possible this winter. He doesn’t know this, I’ve stashed it under the stairs for the moment. We were having a good declutter a couple of weeks ago but that seems to have stalled. Might take another day off work next week I think as we are all busy every day through to Sunday and then there’s only a week to go.

Hope today went well for DD cheninblanc

Goldney is dreamy @Hattifatteners . My cousin held his wedding reception there last year.

Great to hear from you @ZittiEBuoni positive steps sound great...and yes especially having a meal cooked 😋

Lovely to hear from you@ZittiEBuoni . Vegan meal sounds lovely, and a step forward, feel really mournful that we were also getting a weekly meal , but let it slip when adult ds moved back and flat out refused. Why did we let that go.

Lovely to hear from you @ZittiEBuoni and so glad that your dd is looking forward :-) Can I ask you - and any others on the thread with ds’s with or suspected ADHD what your key diagnosis triggers are? I suspect dd probably has adhd (& indeed, I wonder if I have!) but only just starting to feel it’s enough to potentially benefit feom
a diagnosis. Any thoughts/hints and tips on the diagnosis decision and process very much appreciated…

Brummies - booking slots open now!!

If anyone can figure out how to pay your DC's accommodation by DD do let me know. I am finding the instructions hard to follow. We are paying the accommodation and it doesn't seem to want to make that possible.

Good to hear from you @ZittiEBuoni I'm glad you have some good steps forward. The chance of us getting a meal cooked for us weekly though would be very slim!

@CinnamonOrangeCremeBrulee Nothing wrong with wanting to use their room while they are away, especially as you haven't got your own office space. DS is lucky in that he has a bedroom and his own study for the past 3 years, and he was horrified that DH may want the study back when he moved to uni!! We tried explaining that it really wasn't on for him to have two rooms when he didn't even live here! He is still not entirely happy about it...

Thanks for new thread

Birmingham peeps, the accommodation moving in booking slots are open now.

Sorry, Piggy,,I rushed over to post before I saw you’d already posted!