The Golden Rules of Parenting

[JustineMumsnet]

What would yours be? (We are just mulling this in the office) Mine would be not to say: No, NO NOO, oh alright then...

in 2 minds about letting them see you cry. yes, they need to see it's okay and normal, but it does seem to upset/confuse them, so I suppose save it for when it's something serious, not just because you're knackered and they won't stop bickering (it stopped them bickering though!)

Don't always be on the last minute when leaving the house for an appt. Someone will always play up and you will end up shouting and throwing punches.

Tell them what they should be doing rather than what they shouldn't i.e. instead of saying don't run, say walk.

whooosh Bribery rules...... No,No,No it's not Bribery its an incentive... it sounds better at the school gate. 'I haven't bribed Johnny with the lastest Wii...... I have given Johnny a Wii as an incentive... to pass his exams' see how much better it sounds.

Enjoy every moment, rather than wishing it away (can't wait til you can walk/talk/feed yourself/go to school/leave home)

It'll be gone in a flash.

IMoveTheStarsForNoOne So true last year I wished he was at school and now I remember this time last year we had been making biscuits all month together. No time after school. Weekends packed with stuff that used to happen in the week
Plan to make some tomorrow. I won't even start now to get ahead. Your posted has guided me. We will make a mess together and enjoy.

never get drawn into competitive chat. ime children develop at their own rates and nothing much that you do will make a scrap of difference. some will speak/sleep/walk/potty train earlier than others and some will be good/bad eaters. it's the luck of the draw and you'll end up eating your words with subsequent children.

a chocolate button is a trusty weapon

Golden rules of parenting - and yours our?

Oh no!

deleting So true. Will also lose you an opportunity to join a babysitting circle!

Buy the best vacuum cleaner you can afford.

Don't stress about the mess. You will miss all the toys around the place when they have grown too old to play with them.

Do you know, I really don't think I will miss the mess or the toys. Honestly.

Say "yes" as often as possible, but when you say "no", mean it! That and bugger the housework, as my darling dh says, "never mind, it'll be dark soon!" (although this probably only works at this time of year.... less convincing in June )

When about to lose your patience, put yourself in their shoes

Listen carefully to what they say, even when they are tiny. And don't hear just what you want to hear

Always check the oven is empty of toys before switching it on

Laugh with them. This evening when I said I'm just going to walk the dogs my DS2 just looked up at said 'goodbye mum' (its his job!) Also, one for lone parents - MUM is in charge IN THIS HOUSE!!! My kids are 101% confident that when there is a problem mum will sort it - I think that is why they havent really suffered with Dad leaving. As far as they can remember mum has always sorted everything for as long as they have ever known

Never tell your DCs that "Mummy knows everything" then answer "I don't know" when bombarded by questions such as "why are there nasty people in the world mummy?" or "why DO dogs sniff each other's bottoms?" etc etc because you will be met with "but you said you know everything Mummy".........

Two rules:

1. You cannot spoil anybody (children included) with love. If what they want is a cuddle, your company, to be carried...say yes. If they want chocolate, think about it.

2. Whaterver I am doing... if they want to speak, listen

Two of mine bicker and fight constantly over toys. I've realised there's no point shouting from the sidelines to play nicely and share etc etc. you have to get involved and play with them and that way you can see the problem coming and divert it before the scratching and pinching starts. Not always possible, but does work and at least a small part of the day can be fight-free.

Tell your DC frequently: "Nothing you can do could make me love you more. Nothing you can do could make me love you less." And mean it.

Definitely to treat them with respect and admit when you are wrong.

Tell them you love them every day.

Perfect the scary eyed, low voice for moments when nothing else will do. Beats shouting, mine quiver when I use it!

Never hit your children, never get a divorce, never have any boys.

New mum here so a rule for when they are babies: Repeat to self regularly 'one day I will get some sleep'

Be on their side

Speak to them how you would like to be spoken to

Be prepared to model everything

Give them enough love and hugs and kisses to see them through adolescence when you will probably no longer be permitted to, and maybe adulthood as well when they might just decide that you were rubbish and they no longer want anything to do with you!

katnkittens Yep! the scary eyed,low voice one works in this house and being sent to the corner. It means I don't feel the need to smack him. The corner works really well as it give you calming down time, also cleaning up time and if you are wrong it give you time to say sorry.

Have no illusions that you're in charge.
Always ask yourself - 'does it really matter'?

People that have immaculate houses and immaculate children are not normal