The Golden Rules of Parenting

[JustineMumsnet]

What would yours be? (We are just mulling this in the office) Mine would be not to say: No, NO NOO, oh alright then...

Haven't time to read all of this yet, but love the collective wisdom out there.

Have nothing to add, but I like 'pretend to be asleep'(was actually doing this at 5:45 am)

Tomorrow is Another Day.

patience - lots needed when u have kids

boundaries - no means no and following through with naughty step etc

praise when they r good

plenty of quality time with each child

always shut the stair gate or accidents may happen

be the boss dont let then rule the rost

r they really ill

try and listen

agree if silent usually bad news

stick to a routine so that the child knows what is happening and when

always shut doors

keep hot drinks out of reach and wires

try and remain sane

use a reward chart to reward good behaviuor then offer a reward when they get to the end

be strict @ bedtime as it is mummy and daddys quiet time

be very patient when theyr eating

Having glitter all over your house is a sign of being a good mum.

A toddler could get sticky in a padded cell.

The day you don't bring spare knickers is the day you'll need them.

Your child does not need to smell of washing powder (weirdly, I know some that do).

A carpet with a 'fleck' hides a multitude of stains.

Hug lots.

Hide your chocolate.

Sing loudly.

And dance around your kitchen at every opportunity.

Create a sense of fun, keep the mood happy.

Only say no when you really need to.

Having said no never be talked out of it.

Don't tell them one thing and do the opposite yourself. I'm always finding myself shouting at them to stop shouting. My daughter did say one, but you're shouting too and I've tried to say it in a normal voice from then.

dont sweat the small stuff.

Yakult every day for defense against tummy bugs.

Nothing to really add as there are so many fabulous pearls of wisdom here. I'm going to reuse one phrase though that I read on this thread; it's a life-saver: Benign Neglect.

Give them what they need; expect from them what they can give. (Marx knew a thing or two).

I'm with you all the way Le Queen, benign neglect seems to work.

Of course, as with most things, there is an art. I may look as though I'm engrossed in my book but really I can see what's what round corners and hear the grass grow

Without reading anyone else's response , I have to say that my dad's advice is the most useful: CONSISTENCY.

Exercising Benign Neglect theory during play involving glitter is a Mistake. My carpet attests to this (although by measures suggested earlier in the thread, the current state of my carpet indicates I am a FABulous mother. Smug pat on own back).

But LeQueen's rule #1 is never have glitter in the house, so she is safe to practise benign neglect.

I am the sad, muddled sort who embraces both glitter and benign neglect. It's me you need to feel slightly sorry for.

Haven't read the whole thread so apologies if these gave already been said but my golden rules are:

never leave spilt weetabix to clean up later. It sets like concrete and you'll need dome kind of wallpaper scraper to get it off.

1. It's only a phase. It will pass. Repeat as necessary.

1. Everything in moderation. Mcdonalds once in a while won't hurt.

1. Be consistent. Even when you're knackered and just want a quiet life.

5 if you've had a day where you haven't spent much time eith dcs, have 'mummy and xxx' time at bedtime, 5 mins where your attention is completely on them talking about anything they want. Dd1s current faves are what we've done today and what we're doing tomorrow.

'I fail to see why I should get uptight and anxious if they tell me they're bored,'

Absolutely-I tell them that mothers are a lot of things- but not entertainments manager. I am all for benign neglect-it is very good for them.

I've trotted this out on here before, but I love it, so I'll say it again:

An old African proverb says

Give your children but two things
One is roots
The other, wings.

I love that GivesHeadlessHorseman and will use it in the future!
DCs need a very secure loving base, but they also need freedom to make their own mistakes and parenting is a process of letting go gradually.

Remember always that EVERY moment with your child is precious een the tough ones