Do mum's prefer sons?

[emilytankengine]

A few things have happened in my life and recently that makes me wonder??

I adore both my DD and my DS BUT i have to admit my DD is too much like me and i can see conflict in the years ahead! I dreaded having a daughter for this reason! I know mine and my mums relationship struggled because we were so similar!

I think a DS relates to a mother in a different way to the way he relates to the father. I also think a DD relates in a different way to mother and father.

I think the relationship and how it works is driven by the child and not the parent.

I have said it before but a DS eventually finds a life partner like his mother and I suspect a DD finds a life partner like her Dad.

I do not tink parents really express a preference for DD or DS. However I think DD prefers Dad and DS prefers Mum.

No evidence but just my feeling.

I definitely wanted a girl, not a boy. Always did, since childhood.

But I am glad that my DD has (step)brothers!

Crikey abetadad my DH is nothing like my dad!

Interesting theory but...

I expect it only works if you think the parent of the opposite sex is fabbo. If you see them as a flawed individual then maybe you look for a partner who doesn't display the same flaws...

Don't agree with that at all ABetaDad.

I picked someone soooo unlike my dad and DH picked me and i am nothing like his mother thank god.

It was a deliberate act on my part.

Well, my mum definitely prefers her only son but that may be because he is so much younger than my sister and I. He is 20 and it annoys me that she does everything for him (inc. buying his clothes!) while at that age I had left home and was supporting myself.

KingRolo my mum still does everything for my brother too and he is 36 She loves him running home to mummy when he can't cope with life. Sad way to live imo.

abetadad is going to be in for a shocker when his DD starts bringing her boyfriends home I suspect

I mean my dad is very nice, but he is a bit alpha-male and although a good earner (supposedly something women look for) he can have a bit of a short fuse and has a tendancy to think that everything should go his way and that he is always right. I later found out that he had had affairs when we were young as well.

DH is definitely not a high earning alpha type, he has something I value more, he is kind and loving and faithful and a committed, patient and loving father.

Disagree with abetadad.

My parents definitely expressed a preference for my brother too ABetaDad so that's wrong too.

You obviously grew up in a home where there was no blatent favouritism by either parent.

No, my dh is nothing life my father, at all. Couldn't be more different tbh.

agal very true.

And all the siblings married people like their parents as well

My mother does. Her four daughters are as nothing alongside her one son (last born, they kept going until they got a boy).

I adore my son and daughters equally.

I have one of each and certainly dont prefer one over the other - i prefer certain stages some days like yesterday i was not liking my dd whos 6's teenage stage but loving my ds toddler needyness as he keeps asking for kisses and cuddles and hes so darn cute. Today i also love my dd who wants to be grown up and do stuff for me. I am a bit oober soppy with my ds but its odd times as i know hes my last baby and hes growing up so quick plus we never thought we would have another and then it happened and hes here (wrecking everything in sight lol!)

I have two sons and two daughters. I feel blessed everyday and love them all the same. There are times you love them and not like them but how anyone could decide who to give more loving to I dont understand. They are grown up now and waiting for grandchildren. Remember they are only your's on loan for a very short time. Enjoy while you can

I actually feel very sorry for my brother. He has no life skills,no life really....

My mum likes it because she hates living alone with my dad She buys his love/time etc with a new motorbike or looks after his dc in order to keep in with him iyswim?

I am nothing like my parents thank god. I will never have favourites.

I always felt my mum had the son favouring thing going on - when my brother left home to live with his girlfriend i heard her crying at night and she went out and bought a pet budgie (really!) - when i said i was moving in with dh my mum was chuffed and helped me move out asap !

Ach well at least we know we will never behave like the daft mums eh?

My mum does. Always has. Been a rolly-eye joke between myself and my sisters that it's sooooo obvious.
We were out at a family meal for my mum's birthday last night and it was a surprise to her that my bro was there (he lives far away).
As we sat down she reached for his hand and was gazing adoringly at him and i said (half jokingly) 'If i'm ever like that with my ds please shoot me!' as it was just so soppy and gushy and she is NEVER like that with anyone else.
She just turned to me and said 'oh you will be - it's just mothers and sons'
I just answered that i have 2 children (1 boy 1 girl) and would never treat them with so much obvous favouritism but was actually quite offended that she just thinks it's inevitable and the norm really.

My parents favoured my brothers so much - it has caused alot of bad feelings in my family.

I have one of each, and I do worry that I favour my ds. Thing is, he has been much easier. But I relate to my dd better.
Its tricky.

I do know that I seem to expect more from my ds, and I don't know if this is because he is the eldest, or because he is male.

BTW, my Mum thinks ALL males are superior.
Last time she came to visit (from Canada) all we heard from her was "oooh, lets do whatever Mr. Purpleduck wants to do / what ever is easiest for him", and "Oooh, Mr Purpleduck, what do YOU think?"

He got teased just a bit by the rest of us

"I have said it before but a DS eventually finds a life partner like his mother."

That's a very dangerous course of action. My DP did just that when he was young and naïve. By 35 he was desperate to get away from both his mother and his wife...

My late Grandmother openly admitted to preferring my brother over all her other GC, which was galling as I was the one who looked after her/drove her everywhere etc.
My other Grandmother favours (and admits to it) my eldest half-brother as he looks most like my Father (an only).
I am the only girl, so am neither very unlikeable or simply the wrong sex, I am preferring the latter option

I have two boys, and will never let anyone openly express a preference for either of them, it is very hurtful

Lizzy my GPs had a terrible problem, especially my v old fashioned GP.

Naturally boys were superior in his eyes.

Unfortunately his boy GC was into bird-spotting, music, art, never learnt to drive (an essential male art) and never moved out of home.

While his female GC drove, liked a drink, had a decent job, was independent and could beat him at complicated card games.

He found it all terribly difficult

Funny thing is, I favoured my (late) Grandfather anyway....

Oh an either in my previous post.