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Is this normal? Jools Oliver avoids playdates because she worries about whether the other mums at their school drive safely and stap their children in

174 replies

onceinalifetime · 01/09/2008 11:17

Interview with Jools Oliver (doesn't want to be in the public eye but launching new book ).

Anyone else this paranoid?

"Jools admits to being a 'total control freak' as a mother, to the point where she avoids play dates for her girls because she worries about whether the other mums at their school 'drive safely and strap their children in'.

She screams with laughter when I mention the hand wash (which has the antibacterial strength to resist MRSA) in her downstairs loo, acknowledging that she is very 'overprotective' of her girls, which sometimes causes friction between her and Jamie.

'I find it hard to let go, even when Jamie has them. He always tells me to stop phoning him to check on them ? I drive him mad! I never bother him when he's at work, but when he has the kids I will ring to say, "Have you eaten yet, because it's one o'clock?" or, "Don't get Daisy's new dress muddy."

'We took them to Disneyland in Paris and Jamie insisted on taking them on rides they weren't tall enough to go on and I said, "I hate you for this."

'But I know they need the balance. They need Jamie to give them some germs, some mud and some danger,' she says, with a resigned expression on her face.

Jools is blessed with an openness and an honesty that, at times, makes you feel as protective towards her as she is to her family. She worries terribly about how she will cope as her children grow older.

No matter how she protects them now and attempts to instil in them sound values (she is a stickler for 'good manners', making the girls write thank-you letters for birthday presents, and always 'minding their Ps and Qs'), she is aware of the dangers of the teenage years.

'Keeping your virginity is important; it's part of growing up properly. I am not religious, but that is one of my main concerns for my girls ? no drugs, no smoking, and please don't have sex, girls, until you are?well, old enough. I don't mean you have to be married, but I just don't want any abortions. It's not that I disagree with those things, it's just that I want them to do what I did, really.'

But the worries of bringing her two daughters safely to adulthood haven't put Jools or Jamie off the idea of extending their family."

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NotAnOtter · 01/09/2008 11:19

i am very similar to this!

zippitippitoes · 01/09/2008 11:20

she sounds neurotic to me

RubyRioja · 01/09/2008 11:22

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maidamess · 01/09/2008 11:22

Weirdo. She will habve 2 very rebellious teenage girls on hers hands in a few years if she doesn't let them take some risks now.

And people like that over protect for they fear for themselves, not for their children.

NotAnOtter · 01/09/2008 11:22

good enough description zippi

DrNortherner · 01/09/2008 11:22

Oh I can't bear her. Why should she be in the public eye just cause she is married to a TV chef? She acts like she the only person to be a mother ffs.

ellideb · 01/09/2008 11:22

I love Jools and think she is great. A real 'traditional' mother who obviously adores her two girls. I read her 1st book- minus 9 to 1 and it was a good read.

onceinalifetime · 01/09/2008 11:23

Also meant to say that living in Hampstead, what the hell are they doing driving to and from playdates anyway?

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Overmydeadbody · 01/09/2008 11:23

she does sound rather neurotic in some respects.

In others I agree with her, I always make DS write thank you letters for everything.

I don't worry about playdates or call up to check up on DS when he's staying with other people.

traceybath · 01/09/2008 11:24

In her pregnancy book she said that she didn't let them eat the food at parties and took healthy snacks instead.

That'll make them fit in then.

Having said that i do think she's rather lovely and seems a lot more hands on than most celeb mums.

geekgirl · 01/09/2008 11:24

the stuff about not letting them get muddy really grates

children are meant to get muddy FFS

hf128219 · 01/09/2008 11:24

Germs are good for children.
Agree re car seats/rides at Disneyland.

Avoiding play dates - can't she take the girls herself?

SoupDragon · 01/09/2008 11:24

I think she sounds fairly normal. She's neurotic but knows this and is happy to admit it. I think it's only a problem if the person thinks they are being reasonable.

DrNortherner · 01/09/2008 11:24

Well I make my ds write thankyiou notes too, but I don't think anyone else gives a jot to be honest.

WHI CARES?

Overmydeadbody · 01/09/2008 11:24

ellideb aren't most of us 'traditional mothers' though?

What makes her so special or different? Nothing. D list celebritydom gone mad.

DrNortherner · 01/09/2008 11:25

She is not a celeb.

onceinalifetime · 01/09/2008 11:26

Agree re manners etc and worrying in general but avoiding playdates seems ridiculous to me.

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tiggerlovestobounce · 01/09/2008 11:28

I dont understand the thing about the playdates.
She does sound quite neurotic. I thought that mud and dirt was good for kids?

southeastastra · 01/09/2008 11:30

i started to read that article but got bored half way through. i did wonder though what is her name? Jools isn't a real name is it and why use Jools on the book

ForeverOptimistic · 01/09/2008 11:30

She is over the top. The girls have never had an ice cream and she still takes their own food to parties. You have to lighten up at some point.

escape · 01/09/2008 11:31

Not at all normal to deny your kids playdates due to your own neuroses.

Or taking your own food to parties 9unless allergies etc)

She seems a nice enough woman, but these things are not normal , no.

I can't imagine hampstead birthday parties being full of fruit shoots and greggs finest can you?

DrNortherner · 01/09/2008 11:32

Julie or Julia I would guess.

OrmIrian · 01/09/2008 11:32

Bugger me! How do she cope with life? I can't be doing with all that. Sorry.

Bumperlicious · 01/09/2008 11:35

Well congratulations for her for being so hands on. However I am sat at home mumsnetting being creative with DD and no-one offering me a book deal!

BreeVanderCampLGJ · 01/09/2008 11:35

She needs to have a muckmagnet boy next time, that will sort out a lot of that nonsense.

One wonders would she have the time to be quite so nutty, if she were struggling to make ends meet and worrying about fuel bills.