Is this normal? Jools Oliver avoids playdates because she worries about whether the other mums at their school drive safely and stap their children in

[onceinalifetime]

Interview with Jools Oliver (doesn't want to be in the public eye but launching new book ).

Anyone else this paranoid?

"Jools admits to being a 'total control freak' as a mother, to the point where she avoids play dates for her girls because she worries about whether the other mums at their school 'drive safely and strap their children in'.

She screams with laughter when I mention the hand wash (which has the antibacterial strength to resist MRSA) in her downstairs loo, acknowledging that she is very 'overprotective' of her girls, which sometimes causes friction between her and Jamie.

'I find it hard to let go, even when Jamie has them. He always tells me to stop phoning him to check on them ? I drive him mad! I never bother him when he's at work, but when he has the kids I will ring to say, "Have you eaten yet, because it's one o'clock?" or, "Don't get Daisy's new dress muddy."

'We took them to Disneyland in Paris and Jamie insisted on taking them on rides they weren't tall enough to go on and I said, "I hate you for this."

'But I know they need the balance. They need Jamie to give them some germs, some mud and some danger,' she says, with a resigned expression on her face.

Jools is blessed with an openness and an honesty that, at times, makes you feel as protective towards her as she is to her family. She worries terribly about how she will cope as her children grow older.

No matter how she protects them now and attempts to instil in them sound values (she is a stickler for 'good manners', making the girls write thank-you letters for birthday presents, and always 'minding their Ps and Qs'), she is aware of the dangers of the teenage years.

'Keeping your virginity is important; it's part of growing up properly. I am not religious, but that is one of my main concerns for my girls ? no drugs, no smoking, and please don't have sex, girls, until you are?well, old enough. I don't mean you have to be married, but I just don't want any abortions. It's not that I disagree with those things, it's just that I want them to do what I did, really.'

But the worries of bringing her two daughters safely to adulthood haven't put Jools or Jamie off the idea of extending their family."

if Daisy's dress isn't allowed to get muddy why did she put it on Daisy? Why not save it for best and shrinkwrap Daisy instead.

We also have unreasonable and groundless fears about our children (if we are normal). I do let mine go on playdates though

@ Kewcumber

lol at Kew

went to a "play date" with some lovely MNers last week - DS (2.9) ate crisps, crisps hoolahoops and crisps (won't kill him for one day and he had a ball). Jools would have been hyperventilating in the corner presumably.

(ponders whether there is a business opportunity in Shrink-wrapping children)

Think avoiding playdates very sad for her little girls and taking food to parties is just plain rude.
Being a control freak about anything is problematic, being thus way inclined in respect of people is wrong.
Children are just little peaople and deserve not to be 'controlled' at every turn. How would she like it if someone acted that way towards her?

She is a very privileged person, insanely wealthy and has landed on her feet on every level. She will always have people desperate to be her and her families friends.
You have to realise the PR did a great job on them both to seem like "ordinary" people after that whole 15 restaurant docu but in fact they are very removed from reality. Her views in the article confirm this.

acterlyh, he shouldn't be taking them on rides if they're under the height, and he shouldn't be allowed to either. So I don't mind that TBH

juliette

She is totally neurotic.
You can't control whether another parent straps in, allows them to eat ....
But to prevent friendships/playdates becasue of this is ......
very very odd.

I bet the other moms at her DDs school will be a bit when they see that.

Although her image is very down to earth, it comes across as snobbery to not trust fellow parents to drive safely or strap children in. Still can't figure out why they would be driving in Hampstead - those who do are usually in whopping 4x4s with safety bars and their precious darlings would be perfectly safe if they rolled the car over in the high street. Reminds me of a sketch Victoria Wood did about 4x4 driving mummies skidding on Ribena spillages.

she carries on like this her children will pay the price. It is HER problem not theirs and so she should get help to control her neuroses.

I think if most of us talked about parenting to a journalist we would end up sounding barking mad tbh

I have had things I have said to a journalist written up in the most po-faced manner which looked very dodgy when not in the context of a conversation

any kind of off-the-cuff or offguard chatty remark can make you look like a bunny boiler

nobboid

what has seatbelts in someone elses car got to do with playdates ?

Am I the only one who drops and collects their kid when they play at someone elses house ? In fact, I know I'm not, none of DD's friends expect to be collected or dropped off if they come to play at ours.

I admit that certain mothers I know drive like maniacs.

I hate this kind of behaviour towards your own children.

Yet it seems acceptable for the parent to laugh it off as 'just their little neuroses'.

Not on here maybe, but in RL certainly.

Agree with everyone that she sounds a tad neurotic. She has been incredibly lucky with the wealth that her DH has generated. Did anyone read the article because she gave the interview to promote her new childrens' book "Dotty and Bluebell". The new book seems like a pile of wank.

And so I arrange it that I drive my own kids.

Does anyone here drive other peoples children around in their cars without proper car seats? I wouldn't dream of doing so. All the mums she has turned down for playdates are going to feel pretty insulted.

I don't know whether it's normal, but she's clearly doing her very best for her children.

Anyone calling her names for being worried about her kids is a nasty person IMO!

oh, i can't bear her. All of this 'i am just a normal mum' crap. You are very, very priviledged, love. And if you don't want to be in the spotlight, don't appear on your husband's telly programmes and don't write any books. put something back if you want something esle to do.

She is setting the bar very high here in what is only a promotional interview for her madonna-esque book.Risky to say your dh will never have an affair and you know this as fact. And highly daft to set up your kids life as some kind of enid blyton idyll when a large % of celebs kids keep the priory open!Complete head in the clouds nonsense esp the bit about a single parent in a tower block being able to do similar

sorry, not an answer to the op: i agree she sounds neurotic, but can't get that excited about it tbh