Does everyone track their children?

[CaNGCNk]

Is everyone tracking their child now? I had a few people surprised on another group because I said I don’t agree with tracking my children. In school they were talking about. I can see the appeal for a younger child a toddler maybe or a child thats a runner. But are we all just tracking our school age children now? (even if that doesn’t apply)

No.

17, 17 and 12. 17 year olds didn’t get a phone till the end of Y9 (aged 14), 12 year olds didn’t doesn’t have a phone. They all get the bus to school and college.

my husband and I don’t track each other either

That’s interesting- I too worked with DA survivors and we’d discuss having someone knowing where you are as part of safety planning. I think abusive men will install covert trackers, but I know what you mean, the boiled frog normalising, “I thought you’d gone to Tescos, why didn’t you say you’d popped in to see your mum?”

I always think ‘tracking’ makes it sound so negative, as if you’re are sitting there watching their dots move around the map and making notes of the time.

It’s location sharing and if you go in and look, you can see where they are in that particular moment.

Which sounds so much less dramatic.

I don’t have kids but I do have the I-phone find my friend shared with DH. Mostly
it works if he is picking me up I can check where he is. If he was picking me up at work
i’d check where he was before going outside if it’s pissing down. I can’t think of any other time I could be arsed to check. He does check on me sometimes when I go to my further away office as it’s a 2 hour double train journey. If I don’t text to say I’ve arrived he will check I’m at work. Oh, he’s also used it when I got absolutely hammered at a leaving do and called him making absolutely no sense whatsoever and he was worried I wouldn’t get home so he followed my progress onto the train and that I was travelling on the right line.

i worked with a woman who spent all day tracking her other half and her son. The son was because he was truanting so she’d check he was at school, fair enough. The weird part was she’d spend all day glued to her husbands location. He was usually on his day off during the week and she watch him on life 360 obsessively. She’d mention ‘oh he’s at B&Q he must be getting paint…’ Everytime I looked over her, phone screen was on life 360 and I could see her husband’s photo…

I had life 360 with my DW for a while after she came out of hospital, honestly it stressed me out out as she always,forgot to take her phone so disabled it.
My kids are older, tbh it would have been helpful with my DD when she was a teenager but wasn't available then.

I don't and I don't intend to. For one, my kids probably won't have a smartphone until later teenage years.

Secondly, I feel like it would create a false sense of security being able to see them, and possibly impact on their learning to be independent.

Me DH, DD and DS all track each other’s phones.

All with consent.

Life 360

I have 10 people on mine! Is that weird?

No - none of us wanted our every move tracked .

No. In this house we don't track anyone.

It is tracking. You can call it location sharing if it makes you feel better. But it is tracking.

No, no tracking. My one rule when they are out is if I message, they need to reply.

Many, many people have said to me that as they are paying for the phone, they have the right to track.

I believe in the right to privacy

It’s the same thing - tracking the location of where someone is.

No, never tracked either of mine and wouldn't.

People should be aware that if a child is tracked they are probably more receptive to a partner tracking them and wouldn't consider this out of the norm.

My oldest DD is in year 7 and absolutely has tracking on her phone. I almost got her a dumb phone but didn’t just for this.

It’s for peace of mind and I don’t believe it’s giving them anxiety as previous poster said. I think that’s social media, group chats etc.

This is one of those totally polarising questions where lots of people feel tracking is an invasion of their human rights and the rest feel it is a useful tool, with very little common ground. Everyone doesn't, to answer the question. The only thing more contentious is whether to give your child a smart phone or not.

We have find my iPhone and use it in pretty dull ways and I fully accept it might be less use than expected in an emergency. Like all technology, I think the problem is the human users not the actual app. WhatsApp can be a great way to make plans with friends or a vehicle for bullying depending on how it is used. Find my iPhone can reassure me DD14 or DH52 have safely cycled where they are going now and then or a way to stalk someone and invade their privacy. There are definitely people I wouldn't want to have access to my location but DD and DH are welcome to it.

Yes. My kids, particularly my daughter, felt comfort that I could see when she was home in her digs when she was away at Uni. My son travelled Europe by himself and it told us where he was and in which country so again he was happy with this. They also can track us. Never used in a big brother way.

We’re all on life 360 and daughter, her friends and her cousins are on it too (ranging from 18-24).

It’s mainly for convenience, not to snoop.

My DCs are at uni. We can all track each other - have done for years. DCs use Snapchat so they can always see where their friends are, so for them it’s totally normal.

It is interesting that most of those who use it, feel the need to point out that it isnt to snoop or control...

Luckily I am not a party to constant surveillance. DH and I share locations. That is all. So, the impact on me is presumably zero.

I did check where he was today because he was picking me up from the station and I wanted to know how long I was likely to wait. I can’t remember when the previous occasion was.

I can view DS1’s location through his parental control app which also allows me to set screen time, permissions etc.
He was only just 11 when he started walking to high school which was the first time really he had been left alone (apart from walking to scouts which is about 2 mins from the house) so I wanted to have that reassurance.
He’s in Y8 now and does meet his friends of a weekend so I think it’s useful to be able to keep an eye on his whereabouts. He is happy with it.

I think it’s ok to track school age kids (although I didn’t personally) but I think it’s wrong to track them when they are university age. I believe that could be psychologically quite damaging to them.
They need to be independent, free of parental control and masters of their own destiny!
If my (young adult) child needs me to know where they are they can ring me.

They can all see each other on Snapchat. It’s normal for them.