16 Year old daughter doesn’t want to work 😢😕

[HeatherBlack1990]

PLEASE lovely girls ! I need your input 🙏🤝🫂
16 year old daughter has just been offered A CHANCE to come & help out in a busy office to give her something to do in the long Summer months
I know the employers & they are lovely 👍💕
Daughter can’t really be bothered 😕 AND expects ME to book & pay for dance schools and basically fund EVERYTHING all Summer long & BEYOND
It’s not so much the money - it’s that she has very little motivation 😢😞
I had my first job at 11 & worked part-time all through A Levels
Jess shows NO such motivation
ANY / ALL comments gratefully received 🙏🤝💕
Even the negative ones !!!

I agree too.

That’s what I did at that age. And jobs were easy to get then.

She’d be mad to turn down a job in the current climate. It will be great on her cv! Loads of kids would be desperate for it.

Shes obviously motivated for the things she wants to do. Can she either look for something in the dance field or be encouraged into this offer by showing her that earning will give her increased choice in her dancing lessons and activities. Don't make her do make her want to do.

I had four children oldest is 35 Monday , all my kids had a Saturday job at 13 ( when that was allowed) oldest at worked at Tesco stacking shelves he told them he’d become their manager they laughed but in his early 20’s he was !! All my kids paid for their own driving lessons passed at 17 then bought their own car etc , at uni both my girls worked 2 jobs . Fast forward my oldest is a homeowner with 3 children and very successful, daughter 34 high fuller in London who’s at the top of her game with 2 million pound house , daughter 32 teacher with own house second baby due soon , son 27 home owner who works hard and runs marathons all over the world . I love all my children and we have a fantastic relationship but I taught them if you want something in life you have to work for it . Recently a lady messaged me and offered me a free facial she worked for me when 14 on a Saturday and she loved it - she now has her own successful business

Is it your first day on the internet?

To be honest, working in an office all summer sounds boring AF!

Depends what the business is. And sometimes we have to do boring stuff, to earn the money to do fun or exciting stuff. In the next couple of years she might be wanting to go to festivals or on holiday with friends. Or to see stage shows, if she's really into dance. She'll need money to pay for all of it.

I don't think she should be expected to work. But neither can she expect you to fund everything. I had a Saturday job but still got pocket money. But I liked having a bit extra.

@HeatherBlack1990 you're welcome!

When I was 15 my father told me to get a job and buy clothes I wanted myself. Pretty grim, but I would encourage your DD to make the connection between working for money and the good things in life.

I call bullshit. One cannot have a mortgage until 18 because minors cannot legally take out loans.

What does that mean?

I actually find this really sad. 16 is not an adult. I hate the idea of kids all of a sudden being expected to pay rent and get jobs just because they've finished school.

I lived with my dad and siblings, he never told any of us we had to get a job. We were all allowed the summer after school to enjoy ourselves and prepare for starting college, he didnt give us an allowance or anything so we had to pay for things ourselves. Once at college we all got various jobs because we chose to. I was saving for a car so wanted a job to pay for it anyway. We were never charged rent, never forced to work and never told to move out. We're all successful adults now though who completed college and university, got jobs and moved out!

As long as you don't pay for absolutely everything she'll surely find her own motivation to work, like when she wants new clothes for college or to go out with friend etc. Let her find her own way! She'll get a job when she wants one and needs one.

I applied for and got a job to deliver leaflets (they don’t let children apply) and my daughter delivers them and gets the money. She’s 13

If anything happens to her on the job or she does anything on the job, like trip over and break someone's garden ornament, she's not covered by the employer's liability insurance because she's not the employee. We have all these rules, minimum ages for doing jobs, for a reason, and your daughter's safety is one of those reasons.

Reading these replies, make me realise why the teenagers now are so unmotivated and lazy.

It's from Monty Python when they are competing to have the hardest childhoods.

You were married and paying a mortgage at age 16??? You know that's not the norm, right? Teenagers are also allowed their fun and some freedom in between school years/college and exams before the working world beckons. Many 16 year olds want summer jobs, but not all are ready/need the money.

That's a rather sweeping generalisations isn't it? My DS worked p/t from 16. My DD wasn't ready at 16 plus it was the 1st covid lockdown. She worked at 19 plus a 12 month full time job as part of her degree when she was 20/21. So my teenagers/young adults certainly weren't lazy.

Does anyone else think that given the amount of emojis and the “please lovely girls” that the 16 year old has wrote this herself? I just can’t see a 30+ year old writing like this..

@Craftycariad you can’t get a mortgage at 16?

Exactly this! Kids at post 16 often tell each other about jobs anyway in places they are workjng. They don't always want their parents finding jobs for them. They work hard at school and need fowntime during the sumner hols. I know of parents who expected rent the day their DC (17/18) began apprenticeship jobs. I find it sad tbh.

People saying she's too young, she's old enough to vote now!What I would say OP is an office job might not be very tempting, maybe tell her if she can get another part time job that's fine. I waited tables as soon as I got my NI number at 15 and 9 months and I loved it, it was busy, sociable and full of lots of other young people. I work in an office type environment now but would've found office work very boring as a first job (not what I actually do, 16 year old me would've been over the moon, but we wouldn't allowance 16 year olds anywhere near that work -criminal justice).

ETA I didn't pay rent or for my food or basic necessities, my earned money was for my social life and my wants, it was great

There is no way a 16 year old says please lovely girls

Hmm. I got Saturday job at 16, had summer jobs when at college. 3 daughters all found work when 16 and still at school. Granddaughter got Saturday job at 16 (offered after work experience) and still works weekends whilst at 6th form.
Good experience, gained skills, had extra money. Win, win

No she's not. The voting age is 18.

Yup. So lying, or groomed by an older man into marrying him at 16, which is now illegal, and paying towards his mortgage.

An older man grooming you into marriage at 16 is not something that anyone should aspire to and disqualifies that poster from giving good advice on how to manage a teen daughter.

The representation of the people bill is already going through the motions for England, and 16 year olds can already vote in Scotland (holyrood and local elections) and Wales (Synedd and local elections)