How to talk to my 16 year old and 13 year old daughters about how they smell ?

[LosAngelesMom]

I have two daughters, one 16 and one 13.
The 16 year old, has a really strong sweaty body odor. She does wear deodorant but it's not enough aware. By midday she smells.

My 13 year old isn't as bad, yet. Her deodorant can survive until the end of a school day.

The 16 year old's smell was at the same level as the 13 year old, when she was 13 years herself back then. So I need to warn the 13 year old about her possible future.

I want to be able to talk to them without creating some kind of complex. I am a fellow stinky girl who sweats a lot. I get so self-conscious and insecure about it. I don't want them to feel the way I do now.

Any tips ?

Is this some strange kink thing?

if not, you need to see a doctor because no-one that showers ‘at least’ twice a day and wears deodorant should be smelling. Sweating? Maybe. Not stinking

Teenagers might, but the weird thing is failing to accept it and realise that unhealthy suggestions like suppressing sweat overnight or with over use of antiperspirant is wrong and possibly dangerously unhealthy advice.

Mitchum roll on Deoderant and avoid wearing sweaty nylon clothing

We use Dettol soap and the both children have roll on deodorant and a body spray aerosol.

Clothes are washed with Dettol anti bac and clean shirts etc everyday.

I've always been very open with them from a young ish age and when they've moaned about showering said things like you don't want to be the smelly kid at school etc.

No they show and have food hygiene

Dove men’s shower gel is the only thing that works under my arms, then for a gentle but effective deodorant tea tree oil & water in a spray bottle and Wild deodorant on top.

Mitchum roll on (not so much the spray) is pretty good but you do need to hold your arms up for a few minutes to allow it to dry properly. I was a proper sweaty Betty when younger but the Mitchum stopped me from actually smelling. Good luck!

Ah that’s totally your problem. Deodorant is basically just perfume for underarms . They need to use anti perspirant.
i think most people would smell if they only used Deodorant.

No words, but support. My 13 yr old girl is the same. I feel like a cunt because I'm the one who tells her she stinks all the time. If you find a solution, let me know. We too, have tried everything. My DH is not concerned. Just attributes it to "puberty".

I think you may need to get a bit more hands on with the laundry for a while. Check what temperature and what laundry washing liquid/powder is being used.
It's important to shower oneself properly every day-but properly washing and cleaning clothing is equally vital. Laundering techniques are often overlooked-many smells linger in clothing fibres and can be re-activated by body heat.

Definitely anti-perspirant deodorant instead of simple deodorant. It’s a game-changer. I’m not particularly smelly but I bought a simple deodorant by mistake and my armpits were pretty pongy by the end of the day. Not the case with AP. You’re doing them a massive favour - buy some for each of them and say ‘loves you’re smelling quite fruity which is normal. I’ve discovered we need to change products. Please give this a try.’ Throw away the deodorant. As others have said it’s better you than their friends. Children can be cruel.

I had a friend at school who absolutely reeked of BO. It’s the main thing I remember about her and she got bullied for it. Please do something about your teens.

Driclor is amazingly effective for very heavy problem perspiration, but it's so strong that it is actually painful for most people. (It stopped me sleeping).

It doesn't sound like these girls are at that level, they just need to try a general antiperspirant like Sure or Right guard.

I was going to recommend Mitchum or a men's anti perspirant.

I have two teens, 14 and 16. The 16 doesn’t sweat much or smell and the 14 year old sweats ALOT and stinks, despite showering twice daily, deodorant and fresh clothes.

the difference between both of them is that ds is a real clean eater, loves his fruit, vegetables and salads. Dd is completely the opposite! It’s a daily battle keeping her away from sugar especially, and now she’s in a school with a canteen, she’s having chicken goujons and burgers for lunch every day which I’m trying to get her to cut back on.

I’m convinced the BO is to do with what they’re eating, you are what you eat.

As a sertraline girlie who is currently suffering with the sweat side effects (every year like clockwork!) heavily recommend Driclor. It helps to lesson sweating.

Make sure to put it on at night, just before bed, to completely dry underarms. I started with every night, but it is strong so may sting/irritate skin. Switch to every other night if that happens.

Buy some hibiscrub wash from boots or similar, show it to them and say "girls I bought this today for you both to use cos I've noticed your current wash/deodorant combo isn't working, we need to try other things". Matter of fact, not flowery but clear that you're all in it together and trying to help them.

A few things:
-Get rid of any clothes that still smell after washing. Think man made fabrics.
-Teach them to double wash. Go in first with a soap(bar) on something like a flannel or African Net Sponge (doesn’t trap bacteria), then rinse then wash with a nice shower gel.
-Change deodorants. I found Mitchum to be great.
-Glycolic Acid under the arms can help too. A few times a week on a cotton pad. For more “intimate” areas use WitchHazel but on the outside not in (external use only).

I have a friend who works in a hreast cancer unit. Advice is not to use aluminium based antiperspirant.

I don't think there is anything wrong with having a conversation with your daughters about this. My mum definitely would have told me if I smelled!
I recommend panoxyl wash - it's for acne but it's antibacterial and gets rid of the odour causing bacteria under your arms.

24/48 hour anti-perspirant. Anything else is just perfume.

I found out my male BF uses the same one as me because he sweats like a pig. He always smells good even if he's dripping!

‘You pong, love. Let’s see what we can do about it. I ponged at your age too- it’s not fun, is it?’

@LosAngelesMom it could be a medical condition, my mum showers and 5 mins after it she smells of bo, she went to the GP and she got medicated deodorant to use... Which was a big help for her. Might be worth a shot for the 3 of you.

Dettol soap, shower gel, glycolic acid on the pits. Works a charm

I would not use anti-perspirant. Get rid of all dirty cosmetics and look for non-toxic alternatives. Synthetic perfumes as well as other harmful chemical components may cause hormonal issues that, in turn, may be causing the problem to worsen. Natural products (for them and their clothing), dietary changes and correct hygiene: those would be my chosen areas of action. Good luck! I can understand the anxiety of not wanting to create a body issue to your girls 🙏

Having the conversation won't traumatise them, what may do though it friends starting to comment on it. Go about it in terms of it is a normal part of growing up and going through good hygiene practises and trying to find ani perspirant that works for them.