Sick children in playgrounds/classes

[HJA87]

Went to a forest school class on Friday with my 2 and bar maybe one child, every single other child there was ill. I’m talking looking generally unwell, green snot down the nose, coughing and sneezing a lot. Overheard a conversation between two parents about how everyone’s been ill in their households the last week and they had to cancel meetings at work etc. Spent the whole time there on edge trying to keep my toddlers away from the obviously ill ones. Then at the end of the class heard a parent saying,” let’s go home, you’re not feeling well, are you.” Why do people do this and ruin it for everyone else? And please don’t say the usual “ if we never went out when I’ll we would never be out at all”. End of a cold or an absolutely unavoidable outing- I can understand but taking your child to a toddler group in the very infectious beginning phase when they’re sneezing all over everyone is just plain selfish. I’ve noticed this is worse in the UK than any other county I’ve been to. There seems to be a myth about building up immunity where actually, back to back infections have the opposite effect. Immunity builds up during the period of recovery which is why doctors recommend rest when unwell. Seeing clearly unwell toddlers, often in inappropriate clothing playing outdoors in the cold is just sad and isn’t doing them any good in terms of health whilst also
exposing everyone else there.

People are quick to say- if you’re vulnerable, you should be the one who stays home. So your poor child with asthma should stay at home permanently just because some entitled parent doesn’t want their child to miss out on one class (when they are clearly v infectious).

Agree.

I was a “lockdown” mum with four. I adopted two just before lockdown and went on to have another two. Nobody had any immunity and it was absolute hell. My mental health is still shit.

however, the worst bugs we had came from kids that should NEVER have been out. Dumped at nursery, parent turns off phone, child throws up. One child being sent home and mother then bringing her back, twice, in an attempt to let them take part in Xmas activities. One refused, one in a church where the child sat shivering on a bench. She then of course arrived at the village party.

one giving a chest infection to an entire class at toddlers. One with RSV taking out a baby group.

I don’t get it at all. I accept I do have health anxiety as a result of the bugs, but I want mine to rest and recover.

I work in child care, runny nose, standard. From august to June. My issue is the nasty bugs, the sickness, the ones needing antibiotics and the child not being at home.

kids are brilliant as well. I was sick last night miss. Everywhere. Two hours after arriving at nursery.

My child is also well past toddler stage and is very rarely ill, so I’m not sure you’re right about that …

I have a really simple solution:
Stay at home

You don't have to judge others and post on MN that way

YABVU

And judgey

Yea trust me, I would judge you if I saw your kid streaming with a cold in a public space. I wish you would stay at home more. I suspect you don’t because your can’t be bothered to entertain your sick child yourself.

There are definately 2 types of people.

1. Any chance of illness must be avoided at all costs
2. Common bugs are around us all, you just carry on with normal life unless its serious

You OP are the first opinion and I do mean this kindly, you may have some health anxiety if you feel this strongly about it.

You’re probably one of those parents who don’t even notice your children’s cold anymore as you’re so used to them being poorly. I know the type.

Why do you need to be so nasty to everyone on this thread? It’s painting a pretty clear picture of what you’re like as a person.

Someone tells you that you shouldn’t be so judgmental about something you have barely any information on and you leap to some shitty comment about them being a bad parent who “can’t be bothered to entertain your sick child”.

Sometimes you don’t know it’s serious until you’ve passed it on to someone else. A mild illness for one person can turn into something more serious for another (due to age for example).

I agree with you in principle. Clearly sick kids have no place being at nursery/toddler groups/whatever.

I think it’s really hard to judge with some kids though. It’s easy with DS1. He will be poorly for 48 hours before rapidly getting better and no symptoms inbetween. Clearly I wouldn’t take him out and about in the 2 days he was sick.

DS2 on the other hand, never gets properly poorly but stuff seems to linger for longer, despite him being overall ‘well’. His nose has been producing snot near solidly from October to March (something DS1 never did). It’s a lot harder to judge with him when it’s reasonable vs unreasonable to take him out. He also can be grumpy for a whole host of toddler reasons, not just cos he’s ill.

Fingers crossed your kids didn’t get ill today.

Most people on here have no clue on this topic if they think being permanently ill normal. What a miserable way to spend your childhood being poorly all the time. Poor kids.

I did say, I understand when it’s most likely past the very infectious phase. I’m extra annoyed at the moment as my vulnerable grandad is coming to stay with us next week and I would hate for us to give him something.

No one is saying being permanently ill is normal! You either have such extreme anxiety around this or you’re being totally obtuse.

A toddler with a runny nose or a cough while running around playing is normal and does not mean they are ill.

Now you’re on a rant about some fictions child’s “miserable childhood”. Get a grip.

I don’t really know how you can tell which children were snotty and cranky because they were in the middle of an illness, which were snotty and cranky because they were at the tail end of an illness and which are just snotty, cranky toddlers all of the time. Some toddlers would never leave the house if you had to wait for the day they weren’t snotty and cranky! My DN is always snotty and looks rashy and red eyed too but he has a lot of food intolerances/ allergies as well as eczema and asthma which cause this, you’d probably see him and assume he’s ill but unfortunately he just has to deal with that most of the time and he won’t be the only toddler like this. It’s great that you obviously have toddlers who get a cold, recover quickly and retain no symptoms a week later but not every toddler is like this and some will still have coughs or snotty noses weeks later. You’ve judged all of those toddlers as being unwell but if it was literally 90% of the class it seems far more likely you’re just a bad judge of what a normal disposition is like in toddlers, it’s not the same as in adults!

A common cold is hardly a serious illness. Ot should not stop anyone going out and enjoying the first bit of spring sunshine we are having.

Kids will catch their fair share of colds etc from general life like going to a supermarket or travelling. They shouldn’t needlessly be exposed to it at completely optional group gatherings where it’s almost certain you will spread the virus through sneezing and snot. I also witnessed a child there who asked the mum for a tissue and the mum said she didn’t have one- so for tue rest of the class that child was wiping the nose with their hand and then touching shared items. For my 1 year old every cold is at least 2 sleepless nights as he obviously can’t blow his nose so gets congested when led flat in the cot. Yes there are ways to help with congestion but none of it is very effective especially in the night.

How is having a runny nose and a cold not being ill? NHS states that colds are infectious until the symptoms stopped. So runny nose=still ill.

This. I’m not keeping a DC with a cold home because some people have health anxiety.

Selfish. It’s not health anxiety, it’s common sense.

Tbf I agree in principle, theres nothing I hate more than a cold.

Realistically I'd never leave the house and I cannot be stuck in the house all day with a grumpy sick toddler, for both our MH we need to get out although i do try and take him outdoors rather than places like soft play and I'd never take him out if V&D. However colds in the uk through sept-june is unfortunately just what's normal with young kids in nursery/school. I wouldnt be able to hold down a job if I was off looking after my child every time he had a cold- so I'm not going to give up my job, stop my kids going to nursery/school and affect the way we live or our life plan because you dont want your kid catching a cold. Sorry but get over it or dont go out but essentially no the majority of people cant just stay at home every time their kid has the sniffles 🙃 you live in lala land if you think any differently. Maybe the UK seems worse because of attitude of stiff upper lip and get on with things but the country would grind to a halt if we all stayed home with kids everytime they got sick.

Good luck when your kids go to school.

It’s truly mental that you claim to have more just one baby and don’t understand that young children have coughs and runny noses because they are young children and have undeveloped airways, and struggle to blow their nose.

If you think every 2 year old with a runny nose or who does a cough in your presence is infections with someone you must live a very tense life.

Closed space very ill child wrong to bring in, same child outdoors I wouldn't mind unless chicken pox.

I agree OP!
If the kids need fresh air, take them to the park, but not to a playgroup or a museum. As a side note I also don’t understand why some children are left with snot all over the face, just wipe it down!

Well mine don’t have runny noses or coughs unless they have a cold so no I dont think that’s normal (unless an allergy or similar).