What to do when all grandparents want to be called the same name??

[Fluffyted]

Hi,

We're due to have our first baby in January.

We had a family get together on the weekend with my family & my in-laws.
The topic came up about what all the grandparents wanted to be called - both my dad & FIL want to be called Grampy and both my mum & MIL want to be called Nanna.

So now I feel like we are in a little predicament as calling them all the same name is surely going to be confusing for a child?

My MIL & FIL already have a grandchild (our nephew) so they've been called Grampy & Nanna for years already - so want to keep that the same with their next grandchild.

Since we told everyone we were expecting, my mum originally said she wanted to be called Nanny & my dad said "he didn't care" (in a nice way, just he wasn't bothered) so I thought great, we don't have to worry!
🙈

So, anyway that conversation went down like a lead balloon with everyone just awkwardly looking at each other before the subject got changed.

I only had 1 grandparent growing up l, as all my others had passed away before I was born, so I didn't have an issue with naming grandparents.

My partner thinks we should just call my mum "Nanna X" & my Dad "Grampy X" and his parents "Nanna & Grampy" as that's what they are called by our nephew.

I suggested this to my mum - she hates the idea and just wants to be called Nanna.
My MIL is also firmly against the idea of being called Nanna X.

So, what do people normally do in this situation?
I know it's hardly a big issue or problem but I thought I'd ask and hopefully get some help!

I had Nana/Grandad Dadssurname and Nana/Grandad Mumsmaidenname but obv never to their face.
My dad chose to be Grampy and it was a lovely soft name for him.

or one of them can be Horrible Grandma?

Gran and Grandad Smith, and Gran and Grandad Jones, surely. Perfectly normal.

I call both my grandmothers Nan! When speaking about them with e.g. my parents and need to differentiate between them, they are “nanny a” or “nanny b” (surnames) which is also how their numbers are saved in my phone 😂 I was never confused as a child!

The kids will likely make up their own variations or the oldest will come up with something like Nanna Nose because of the one time she had a bit of coffee foam on her nose and it will stick for eternity. :D

My mum also wanted to be a Nana, but MIL was already Nana to our niece and nephew, so DM chose a different name.

She chose a non-English one (e.g. 'Oma') though we don't have any affiliation to that country (probably cultural appropriation).

Haven't read the thread but have any of them considered your child may want to call them something different? My DD calls her grandparents similar names, and nothing like what my parents actually wanted to be called. My mother found it very confusing at first but now she rolls with it. I wonder if your child may do the same and grandparents better be prepared to be called something odd instead!

Ha - one of my friends has a 'Horrible Grandma'. to be fair, horrible grandma did try to steal away their eldest child by volunteering 5 days a week childcare, then coaching said child to say he'd like to move to hers permanently. And then when my friend objected to having her child nicked, grandma disinherited her!

I called both my grans Granny, I'm sure there was probably confusion for my parents but I wasn't aware of it

You/they just call them Nanna and Grampy when you are speaking to them and they are present and, if you are speaking about them and it is not obvious who you are talking about, you call them Nanna/Grampy + name. It can be a nickname instead of a name eg one of my grandmothers was known as Granny name of her cat, the other was Granny mispronunciation of the place she lived 😂.

I had 2 nanny and grandads growing up and it wasn't confusing at all. My mum and dad would just say "we are going to nanny x's" but I always just called them nanny/grandad to their faces. In my experience children often call you what they want anyway (my 1 year old calls me "me" not mummy) so it's a non-issue.

Both my sets of grandparents were Grandma and Grandad and there was never any issues.

If children are spending a lot time with grandparents a version of what they are called will evolve. Example Grandpa often as child starts to speak may just say Pa if they are together a, lot Grandpa and Grandma will start using Pa too
Anyhow don't think you will be able control this for long once child is speaking so go with whatever grand parents want for now, no need to think into it too much.

We had nana redcar and nana blue car.The colours of the cars they drove 🤣

We had this. We initially had Granny and Grandad first names, and Granny and Grandad town names to distinguish (town name G&G were dead against first names). Over time, we saw one set several times a week, and the other set a few times a year, so naturally one set became just 'granny and grandad'

Growing up I had nanny a and grandad b and then another set of grandparents were nanny c and grandad d but then I had a grandpa e and granny f too.

Even now, my dc have their grandma, their grandad, then there's nanny and grandad a

Surely this a non issue. To their faces they are nanna/grampy. Then when they aren't there you just tag their name on so the kids know which one you are referring to?

I had this growing up, it turned into Nanna Trains, as she lived by trains etc.

Both my mum and Mil wanted to be called grandma. Unfortunately they both had the same first name. Our kids worked it out- they called them big grandma and little grandma.

Now I'm a grandma- I'm grandma Avery, there is grandma X and (great) grandma Y. No problem!

We had Grandma Jenny and Grandma Julie. No probs at all.

Our kids just named them what they could say and it stuck.

So we have a dodo and a papa.

Then we have to granny's. But they are identified as granny with the papa and granny with the 🦤

We had Nanny Elsie and Nanny Mary. Same for grandpas. (Charles and Peter. Not grandpa Elsie)

Never under the Nanny Smith and Nanny Jones, way too formal for us!

Growing up in Yorkshire in the 1970s, it was Grandad and grandma as the only choices. The surname was appended for clarity. I never got confused. When I was actually in their physical presence I just used grandma/grandad and dropped the surname.

I had so many grandparents growing up because of great grandparents and step grandparents they were all just Nanny (first name) and Grandad (first name). I don’t see why they have to have different names.

Call them what they want then when you are saying we're going to Nanna's and Grandad add their first name like Nanna Joan and Grandad Pete.