How old to tuck child in and leave them alone to fall asleep?

[Weddingbells6]

I have a 7 year old, small night light and Tonie box in their bedroom. Since they were born I have laid on the floor for 20-40 minutes each night either reading to them or singing nursery rhymes etc while they fall asleep or are almost asleep and I feel ready to claw some of that time back for myself.

What age did you start tucking yours in and saying I love you etc and then leaving them to fall asleep on their own? I’m feeling a bit guilty. I supervise brushing teeth and toileting first obviously.

Thanks

4 months!

Since I stopped breastfeeding... Around 16 months?! 7 is absolutely mad.

Same here. After a story and a cuddle I have always left them to fall asleep by themselves. If they are unsettled for any reason I'll go back to them, but they are now almost 8 and 11 and fall asleep without any fuss

Currently lying on the floor while my 3 year old falls asleep. My DH can leave her to fall asleep by herself, with me she just follows me about so it's been quicker and easier to lie here. I take her up at 8 and she's usually asleep by half past. I can handle that, if it was much longer more often (tonight she's ill so she's getting a pass 🤣) I'd be more inclined to try and get her to "grow out" of it.

Just before 2 years old when he stopped breastfeeding. Before that he was breastfed to sleep in a chair in his room and then put to bed.

I could never sit on the floor and wait for my child to sleep. He's tucked in after a few bedtime stories and I hot foot it out of there to enjoy my evening.

Since dd was born 🙈😂

I never hung about once she was cuddled up in bed.

At 7 they are definitely old enough to kiss goodnight and leave to it.

Okay so I’ve been a mug hahaha. I don’t feel bad anymore so thanks!

Since about 3, basically when they stopped falling asleep during stories. I’d leave the room and potter around and go in if needed but I made it clear that it was bedtime now and I had things to do.

Also, those staying in your childs room, do you not find it keeps them awake? Surely you being there distracts them? When mine were toddlers no way would they have rolled over and gone to sleep if i was there they'd have found it too much fun to watch me, check if i was awake, reach out and touch me, try and talk to me etc!! No chance

But I get this with my 3 year old. We chit chat while I brush his teeth and he gets into his jammies. Then we read up to 3 or 4 stories and have a wee cuddle.

You don't need to sit on the floor by their bed holding their hand until they fall asleep to have these nice moments before bed.

Left mine from being a baby to fall asleep by themselves.

From the start! Bath, story, bed.

We had four under six though so no chance of taking time to lie on bedroom floors. Especially since my husband worked nights for a proportion of time so I was spread quite thin!

4 months

Mine would have been exactly the same!

He still sometimes gets over excited when we read the bedtime stories he'd be a hyperactive mess if I didn't leave the room at all.

I put them both onto their cots awake. I didn't feed them to sleep. They had a nightlight and I read a story when I thought they would enjoy it. But no staying on the floor!

I think it's different for every child. I have friends whose babies fell asleep by themselves practically since birth and others who would cry until they were sick if their parents tried that.

My husband has been leaving my dc to fall asleep since 18mo and still does, although dc would rather he stayed.

I used to breastfeed to sleep, then had a phase of being able to leave dc to fall asleep alone from about 2-2.75yrs. But then dc got separation anxiety, was sleepwalking and constantly getting out of bed and coming downstairs. So for the last year I've been staying in the room until dc is asleep (I don't interact, I read my phone on a chair. Tbh I quite like it).

About 3 or 4 for our DC. I think DS2 was the earliest at about 2. I used to stay until they were asleep when they were little. I am glad that I did - lovely memories.

I think you're fine at 7 :)

6/7 months with both of mine!

Solidarity here OP, nearly 7 year old and I’m in bed with her until she falls asleep, often it’s not until 9 or later! I think it really does depend on the child, she’s always been high needs, clingy, doesn’t go downstairs by herself etc and quite controlling at times (‘mummy you have to do this..on repeat etc until I just relent) I often just fall asleep with her and then that’s my evening gone. Once you get into habits like this for a while I think it’s hard to break, especially as they get older and can just get out of bed to find you / shout for you etc!

I think it's different for every child. I have friends whose babies fell asleep by themselves practically since birth and others who would cry until they were sick if their parents tried that.

Yes, but lying on their bedroom gloor every night until they are 7 seems pretty extreme!

Yep it is! I’m one of those (per my note above) and it just sort of becomes a habit and you then realise you haven’t had an evening on your own at a reasonable time for years..

First born, about 2 years old. Second born, about 7 months. Neither involved leaving them to cry. They both just got to the point they were happy to fall asleep on their own, but at very different ages

5/6 months old with all of mine. Never, ever stayed in the room with any of them. I don't have the patience!

This! Can’t believe so many are doing this! My DC’s have always gone to sleep alone at night since they were babies old enough to. Both have gone through phases of up and down stairs/being called back for several cuddles but we’ve never laid with them until they fall asleep. We need our evenings! Never left them to cry either, tried that out of desperation with DC2 once, I broke and went in to cuddle him and never tried it again.

Honestly- I don’t really remember, but every child is different, and you have to do what’s right for you. I think we moved to ‘I’ll be right outside’ at a year, maybe? to ‘check you in a minute’ then gradually they forgot about the checks. And from us reading to them to them reading by themselves for 15 mins or so, by 7 or 8. Just gradual change, and as they start having sleepovers they will see others routines, they will get there.