To hate the phrase "No Thank you"

[Wishingplenty]

I really hate the phrase "No Thank you" often said to a very young child, usually in a high pitched condescending tone, often when said child just wants to interact in a friendly manner with whoever is saying it's child.
Case in point, my 10 month old baby who has just started crawling, crawled up to a child about 3 and wanted to look at her boots. Mother of said child says loudly in a really high pitched condescending to tone oh "No Thank you" to my baby son.
Why say this to a baby? and why are you teaching your toddler to be totally unpleasant to a much younger child?
I have encountered this a few times to varying degrees with other children and just find it so utterly rude and nasty and most of all completely unnecessary!

I don't say it to children in particular; but I do prefer it to a flat, often rude, "no".

My child says no thank you to anything she doesn’t want to do. She’s 10 and it’s very polite but impolite at the same time.

This!!!

it’s a god damn BABY GROUP!!!! 3yr old at a baby group not the other way round. These are open groups to allow babies to gain basic skills and touch and feel because we all need to learn.

what would you rather she said? Not sure how else you could word it without being rude …..

If people are saying this to you/your baby repeatedly you are the issue here. People on the whole are very welcoming of babies I find, certainly other parents and I’ve never had people shoo mine away so I’m guessing yours is a bit too handsy/grabby and you aren’t quick enough to intervene.

What would you rather? Get lost? Go away?

If this was at a mother and toddler group - and why else is a 10-mth-old crawling on the floor?- then the mother was rude to the OP. The children are there to interact. I would be offended - and have never, never had this happen in such a group (mind, times change and alas, manners!).
Correct response: 'isn't he crawling well, how old is he, they're so curious at that age, aren't they?'
If that is not your response to a baby crawling up to your child in a child-friendly social setting then don't go there.

She was teaching you boundaries although l think she could have been a bit kinder.

She was rude. It's a toddler group.

Why was she at a toddler group if she doesn't want her child to interact with other children?

If you truly believe this is cruelty or bullying you absolutely have no concept of what that actually is. It's perfectly okay and actually very responsible to teach your child 1. To respect people's boundaries whether you agree with them or not and 2. To say No when someone is doing something that makes you feel uncomfortable.

It's a baby group! Can't believe the responses here, surely the whole point is to encourage exploration and interaction.

Why would you go to something like this if you had this attitude to inquisitive babies?

I absolutely agree! This is what’s wrong with the world today raising children who can’t play or socialise! Ridiculous

Baby/toddler groups aren’t a free for all though. We have no idea what the toddler was doing, maybe they were already playing and felt annoyed at having their shoes grabbed.

Both children have to want to interact.

YABU

@housethatbuiltme babies can understand tone.

@Mummy3Plus1 it's a shame when an inquisitive baby makes people feel uncomfortable, especially at a baby group.

Bang on! Some people just can't see how problematic their children can be to others! That I find ruder than "no thank you"!

@MoonWoman69 is a curious baby at a baby group where everyone is on the floor wanting to look at another child's shoes really "problematic"? This is how babies learn.

If I were the parent of the 3 year old I would be more interested in teaching my child how to safely and happily interact with babies and children younger than themselves than wading in negatively.

There are so many reasons a child could feel uncomfortable at a baby group, including SEN. Respecting boundaries and encouraging children to learn saying No is okay, is actually a fundamental part of safeguarding. The reasons why they said no is absolutely irrelevant, it is not cruel nor bullying.

@Wishingplenty who doesn’t want a baby crawling up to them? Everyone loves a baby! Myself and my children would be absolutely thrilled to entertain your lovely inquisitive baby! Xx

Interacting with other children and learning to socialise is why I took mine to groups . There was no reason the other mum of the toddler couldn’t have been a bit more polite. Miserable buggers .

Agree with you, it's horrible and am surprised (shouldn't be really) at the replies you have had.

@Mummy3Plus1 if it has to be done it can be done in a nicer way, without being dismissive or abrupt.

People on the whole are very welcoming of babies I find,

I thought this too until I read this thread! Apparently they're sticky 'orrible things that are comparable to dogs and everybody seems to have raised children that like to kick them 😱