Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 ··· 10 11

Original poster

Is is wrong to go on holiday without your child?

258 replies

GinFizz3489 · 12/04/2024 13:22

I have a 3 year old and as you can imagine he is full on!

We took him abroad last year on holiday and it was nice but I didn't really feel like I got a holiday, more just parenting in a new location. Myself and my husband didn't really get to enjoy nice meals together or kick back with a few cocktails.

We are going away a family holiday abroad again this year and have chosen somewhere really geared towards kids entertainment etc.

I mentioned to my husband about maybe booking a holiday next year abroad for just the two of us to actually get a break. However this would mean we couldn't have a family holiday abroad.

Is this wrong? Should I just suck it up and accept this is my life as a parent and that I won't have many years of taking my son abroad? Or do we take some time for us?

While we are away my son's grandparents said they would take him away either abroad or somewhere in Britain so he isn't missing out.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

converseandjeans · 12/04/2024 16:48

I think it depends on how much time you have with him rest of the year. If he is full time nursery & you don't have much down time with him it's a shame for him to miss out. But if you're always with him, going out to do stuff then it's not such a big deal.

I do feel sorry for kids who are in nursery 48 weeks a year & then get sent to kids club on holiday too.

Personally I think they're only little for a short time & you can go away without him when he's older anyway.

Could you compromise & a long weekend away to start with?

converseandjeans · 12/04/2024 16:50

@GinFizz3489

Sorry didn't see you post about working part time & term time only. It sounds like you're always doing stuff with him & so I can't see that it would be a bad idea for him to get used to staying with grandparents?

Starsandflowers · 12/04/2024 17:39

Of course it's not wrong! Especially at that age.. he gets to go to grandparents and be fussed over abd do child centred activities.. while you abd DH do something he would find very boring.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

3 year olds Families

seasaltbarbie · 15/04/2024 11:23

It’s not wrong no but everyone is different so only you can decide how you feel. I have a 3 year old and a baby and there’s not a chance I’d leave the country for a week without them. I just wouldn’t enjoy it at all.

Stompythedinosaur · 15/04/2024 11:30

I think a week is a long time to be away from a young child tbh.

I don't think there's anything wrong with having a break, but personally I wouldn't leave him for that long. It's also a bit tricky prioritising your finances for you to have a holiday so he doesn't get one.

I don't think it's wrong, but I wouldn't do it.

JRM17 · 15/04/2024 11:39

This is a very contentious topic that I have very strong opinions on. My cousin leaves her children with grandparents every year (her 2 DDs are 10 and 5) and this makes me feel physically sick that they would do this. I could never imagine leaving my DS7 at home while I went on holiday, you can't choose to be a parent then fob your child off on other people so you can galavant IMHO it is just wrong.

noonesayscheese · 15/04/2024 11:40

Maybe just 4 nights somewhere. Your son won't even remember this when he's older.

BrickSnail · 15/04/2024 12:15

I don't think it's wrong, I'd love to do it but wouldn't have the balls.

I'd definitely start small with a weekend though and see how it goes.

Are your kids old enough to use the holiday club facilities yet cos that's a game changer when you can drop them somewhere for a few hours each day

Osakagirl · 15/04/2024 12:24

I'm not sure how much kids of that age really enjoy big holidays tbh. Mine loved pottering around at their granny's place or going to somewhere like Devon. They hated heat, wanted familiar food etc. If you could have a short break to recharge you'll enjoy it more and it will be good for your relationship with your DH as well.

Bertielong3 · 15/04/2024 12:25

This reply has been withdrawn

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

EmmaM84 · 15/04/2024 12:29

Would you consider a holiday with child and grandparents? We've done this the past few holidays as luckily we get on great with my parents. It means there's other adults there to share the load and you can arrange to have couple time just the 2 of you.

1plus1equalswindow · 15/04/2024 12:46

If he's "full on" you need to tell him to be less so. I think kids prefer time with parents, even if they're being ignored. You don't need to put that much effort in making things fun for them. But they will feel it if they're being fobbed off to someone else.

Honestly, all I would think/talk about would be DC so it's best just to have them with us anyhow.

Last year, my mother had her first holiday without kids. I was so glad for her. She's in her 80's. so not saying it should be that extreme, but 3 is a bit young.

headayche · 15/04/2024 12:53

A long weekend away sounds fine, though I personally have never done it. I wouldn't holiday away from my children however.

For me, holidays are about making sure my children have the most enjoyable time they can. I holidayed before them and I'll holiday again for me when they're grown.

stayathomer · 15/04/2024 12:55

My parents did this once or twice when we were young, they’d go abroad for a week, then when they got home we’d go on a caravan holiday. I think it was a money thing as there’s four kids, but it worked fine, we got to spend time with my Aunty which we loved

bingboo121 · 15/04/2024 12:56

Thats sad..a break for you is being away from your little 3 year old. Is he in nursery as well otherwise? How little time is he actually having with his parents if you both work and he is in nursery and on your holidays you opt to stay away from him

bingboo121 · 15/04/2024 12:59

Imo holidays are family holidays when kids are little, i dont get people ho have children and are still me me me

Kosenrufugirl · 15/04/2024 13:04

I used to work as a healthcare assistant in various wards of our local hospital. I got very used to hearing old people asking me the variation of "Is my son/daughter coming to visit today?". Go on holiday without your child if you must. Just bear in mind you reap what you sow

Sayingitstraight · 15/04/2024 13:09

DH and I have weekends away and leave the kids with GP, it's bliss. I wouldn't however sacrifice our annual family holiday for it, if we couldn't afford to do both we would have our family holiday only.

Blanketison · 15/04/2024 13:12

I wouldn’t want to miss out on a whole holiday with DC. A long weekend, great… but you don’t get many summers where they want to be with you OP… I’d enjoy it while you can… lots of time for those sorts of holidays when he’s a bit older/left home!

ButterflyKu · 15/04/2024 13:14

I have two toddlers and I’d be QUICK to go on holiday without them. They’ll be fine

StMarieforme · 15/04/2024 13:28

Not at all! You're allowed to be a couple as well as parents 😊

Charlie2121 · 15/04/2024 13:36

I have a DS who is also 3. I can’t imagine not wanting to be part of his holidays at this age.

We have no family support so have to do everything with him but other than the obvious logistical issues that causes from time to time I consider it an absolute blessing.

We are not young parents so always struggle to understand what so many others claim they need a rest from their child. I want more of him not less!

Flaskfan · 15/04/2024 13:48

We had 2 of them by the time dc1 was 3, so there's no way my parents (that's all we had) could have taken them both for a week.

We've only ever had 1 holiday a year, so it would have to be a family one. They weren't always easy, and it did feel fraught at times, but there were lots of laughs. I did miss our pre kid holidays, but the kids (now teens) look back fondly on the ones they can remember. We just accepted that holidays changed for a few years and now we're at a point where we're pretty much headed towards the end of family holidays.

StopStartStop · 15/04/2024 13:50

Of course it's wrong, Meghan but it doesn't stop you doing it.

VJBR · 15/04/2024 13:52

Nothing wrong with having a break just with your husband but if it means you can't have a family holiday then that is different. It seems a shame that your child has to miss out on a family holiday because you want a break from him, and then giving your parents the responsibility of providing him with a holiday.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 ··· 10 11

Swipe left for the next trending thread