Am I wrong for not taking 3 year old to hospital?

[sugaryouth1]

I know the title seems bad but here's the background

My daughter is 3. She's been ill non stop for about 6 weeks. Low fever, chesty cough, cold symptoms. She's just been diagnosed with slapped cheek as well. So she has a bright red face and a rash.
I took her back to the doctor today because nursery sent her home as she had a new rash. It is just the slapped cheek as the rash can come and go. But nursery have said she needs to see a doctor or she can't come back.

Anyway we went to the doctor and she was really condescending. Told me I've been to the doctor 4 times this month and that maybe she's okay and I'm not. It really upset me to be honest. Anyway she listened to her chest and said she could hear a crackle but she didn't want to give her any more antibiotics as she's had a couple already. Fine. I'm not the sort of parent that demands antibiotics. .they want her to go to the hospitals CAT unit to see a paediatrician.

I have some issues.

1. I can't get there without a taxi. I cannot afford a taxi. Its almost 20 quid and it's money I don't have. The public transport is few and fair between

1. I don't think she needs to. She's currently running around my house absolutely mental and destroying it and the idea of sitting there and waiting for 10 plus hours like last time fills me with dread

1. Again the last time she was there she caught covid and flu making her even more poorly and meaning she missed nursery and I missed work

Don't get me wrong, if she was sick I'd of course take her. Am I going to get into trouble for not taking her? Is there anything else I can be doing? I usually will always listen to the doctor and of course If she was sick I'd take her. I just don't know what to do

No idea why they'd think this was a you problem then. Your child has clearly been very ill. Best of luck op

Wow this thread is unnecessarily nasty.

OP you’ll be fine to take her tomorrow assuming she stays fairly well in herself.

If you are in a position to get down there early tomorrow I’d do that and hopefully avoid a long wait.

I have the means to get my children to hospital easily enough and unless it was urgent I’d think twice about going late afternoon knowing I’d probably end up there for hours and hours with a tired child.

Sounds rough, op. I have a 3.7 year old and a 14 month old and by god, I think we've had one week where we've all not been sick since the middle of January. I'm done in. Sympathies as I know how it is.

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OP I don't understand why people are giving you grief. You are absolutely doing your best. I completely sympathise with your situation. I'm sure going tomorrow will be fine. Do ask at the hospital if you need to go more frequently if there is a volunteer ambulance service that takes outpatients to and from the hospital and if you can register. You have really had a bad time with your DD. I hope she improves after tomorrow. Ignore all the comments from people who think you are under some obligation to make friends and contacts, I would have had no on either when my children were small. Lots of people are in your situation. You are doing well managing to work and look after your DC on your own. It must be so worrying coping with it all alone, and then you come on here for some support and get all this criticism!
Look after yourself, I know you are taking good care of your DD.

It sounds like she could do with checking out to make sure she doesn't need to go into the list for tonsils out or other potential treatment.

But it also doesn't sound like the GP was concerned enough that it has to be tonight.

You are monitoring her carefully. That's what I'd do in your circumstances given she is currently well.

The recurrence of illness should be investigated to check for potential causes and presumably the GP thinks the hospital is better placed to do this. Her immediate health appears stable.

Ok that sounds pretty unfortunate. Your closest safety net will probably be nursery contacts, especially the parents of your daughter's friends. There must be a Whatsapp group of some sort. Ask the teacher which children she plays with most often and try to make a few play dates with those kids so you get to know the parents. If you don't actually live rurally and probably in close proximity to the other families, then it really won't be a big issue for someone to drive you to hospital or lend money for cab fare.

FB mum groups are also an option, although it seems a bit riskier to rely on total strangers. However some people seem genuinely kind and you reach a bigger pool of contacts.

OP, if my LO was unwell but generally ok in terms of awake and perky especially if they've also eaten as you had mentioned in a previous post I too would wait till the morning as it is probably not a medical emergency. It usually means the waiting times will be a lot shorter too. Good luck. Sorry for all the mean comments x

All the best for the morning and I hope you both get a good sleep tonight

Ah it's tough when your wee one is unwell and you're on your own with them.

Did the GP say she had to go immediately? Unless they did, I'd say tomorrow is absolutely fine. Even the hospital transport tomorrow night would be fine. It doesn't sound like a serious issue (although I'm just basing that off what you've said) so I can't imagine it's time critical you getting her seen at the CAT unit.

Not going to give you any advice on whether you should take her but just offering solidarity. I also have a three year old who since January has had two separate stomach bugs, tonsillitis, an ear infection and another undefined lurgy that caused a 40 degree fever and a non blanching rash. With the things that needed antibiotics I must have taken her 3/4 times before we got antibiotics and we’ve been to the hospital twice on advice from the GP. It is so hard and stressful. Hope it all passes soon

A pre-paid season ticket for the bus will not pay for a taxi.

Not everyone can afford a naice house in a well-connected area. Especially when working a NMW job.

Your post doesn't solve OP's immediate problem, so what did you plan to achieve other than kick her whilst she's down?

In case anyone is wondering we are at the hospital now

Good luck OP your doing a great job x

Great news OP - hope all goes well and you get some answers

great news OP! Best of luck today. I'm glad you got through the night and hope you are well looked after at the hospital.

Good luck. Be firm and advocate for your daughter. Don't get fobbed off.

Hope all goes well

Aww that's good love. You've done what you can and now it's the drs turn to get her on the mend. I hope little dd feels better soon xxx

I'm sorry last night was another tough parenting night on your own. You deserve a wee break. Feel better soon and be kind to yourself xxx

Hope they can sort out the wee one!

We are home. She has a chest Infectjon. 2 weeks of antibiotics. Referral for a chest x ray in 5 days and had some bloods done

@sugaryouth1 just wanted to pop on with support. I hope she is feeling better soon. Please give yourself a break, you sound like a lovely mum.

Glad she got sorted.
I know its v hard being so broke and isolated
Try if you can to make some connections, i know i would be gutted if there was a young mum up the road from me fretting over her baby for the want of a lift. Id give a spin in a heartbeat but not if i dont know.
There are kind people out there.

Many folk would you just need to reach out @sugaryouth1