Parents - Do you think people without children have missed out?

[Pshop55]

So this is for parents only! I want to know if you feel that people without children are missing out on a big experience/feelings/joy & ‘don’t know what they are missing’ and be honest! No one is judging just want honest answers as we have been talking about this tonight, obviously everyone’s answers are just their own opinion before anyone gets offended!!

They're missing out on all the love and joy of having your own child. That's it!

Having kids isn't for everyone.
Some people I know really value their freedom to travel and spend time and money in themselves.
I always wanted to be a mum so I know I would feel I was missing out of I did t have my children, but that's just me.

Yes I do, but if you don't want children it's probably best not to bring a child into the world.

Exactly this. It is such a joy. Nothing comes close.

Yes exactly this. I would say I understand why people don't have children more since having them. The climate crisis means we need people who don't want children because some people have 5+ and overall we need a falling population.

I think you are overcomplicating things. You could decide to have them and as you say live to regret it. Or you could decide not to have the or delay to long and miss the opportunity and regret it until the day you die. Perhaps you need to tackle your fears so you can make a more clear decision.

OP seems to feel they would rather not take the risk, which is fair enough. Luckily its not compulsory so it's better to not have them as, as OP says, there is no going back, and the consequences could be harmful to the child. The OP's question would be answered by me and many others as yes, because its obvious, but it's better not to have children and risk regretting it than have them when you are not sure and think you are missing out because the latter decidion means another, innocent person is affected. You have to make the illogical decision to have them despite the obvious pitfalls. If you don't want to do that, don't.

Pshop55 · 07/01/2024 18:24
@SouthLondonMum22 It's totally irrational, it also isn't very logical but I'm glad I took the leap of faith. So far it is easier than I expected but DS has only just turned 1 so long way to go yet!

She has a son.

@Angrycat2768 I think you are right, it does seem crazy that people can see it’s illogical and irrational but still want to take that risk, my brain just doesn’t work like that. You could say its all fear and that needs to be worked on but I would say that I can’t understand why the average person doesn’t have the same level of fear and concern I have, because it makes common sense. I think this is why the birth rate is dropping massively for millennials, one of the many reasons anyway.

A more "common" common sense approach would be to say that humans have reproduced for milennia, and in the vast majority of cases this has been a positive thing.

This by no means forces you to have children you're unsure about, but it should help explain why your level of scepticism on this is on the unusual side of the scale

A more common sense approach would be that it has been only very recently that women have been anle to access reliable contraception and legal abortion (and yes, not all women everywhere), so what human beings have done for millennia isn’t necessarily a good guide to whether an I distal human being should choose to have a child or not. My mother had no choice over her pregnancies, for instance. I can guarantee no one ever asked her if she wanted children.

I mean, every single one of our ancestors had at least one child, right? But that’s not any particular reason to replicate their decision.

The OP already has a son, so I find this level of navel gazing a bit odd and asking people to convince her to procreate, rather odd.

1. I have no kids
2. I am a man

Not sure where you got that from!

Probably from you writing this?

Pshop55 · 07/01/2024 18:24
@SouthLondonMum22 It's totally irrational, it also isn't very logical but I'm glad I took the leap of faith. So far it is easier than I expected but DS has only just turned 1 so long way to go yet!

This is the most baffling thread ever.

But if you are a man, I think you have posted many, many times under another name asking why you should have kids, and nobody has been able to convince you why, so don't!

I think there is a difference between someone who closes to be child free and those who desperately want a child and can't....or vice versa, those who don't want kids but accidentally have one...

Personally for me, I miss a few things I wanted to do...but the sacrifice for DD is very much worth it in my opinion. The things I wanted to do, have changed.

@SouthLondonMum22 said that not me!

What other name? Talk about jumping to conclusions!

@SouthLondonMum22 It's totally irrational, it also isn't very logical but I'm glad I took the leap of faith. So far it is easier than I expected but DS has only just turned 1 so long way to go yet

Do you plan to explain this?

Yes I do. I think people without children can live very fulfilling lives but I think being a parent is such a special thing and it's a unique kind of love. I would hate to have not experienced it. With that said, there are people with children I know who probably should never had kids...its not for everyone!

That's so sad to read 😔

It was a quote from @SouthLondonMum22 not me talking

I said that, OP didn't.

If you go back to that post, it's very clear that OP quoted it and was responding to it.

Thank you @SouthLondonMum22 I couldn’t agree more