I have come to the conclusion that I am not a great parent and I don't really enjoy it

[pruners]

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Yeah - when my DD does role reversal. I will have given her a cause and effect ultimatum - e.g. if you don't put your shoes on then you won't be going on your playdate.

She'll then remember this type of threat and come out with

"if you don't let me paint then I'll never tidy up the mess I've made"

What the feck will she be like when she's a hormonal teenager if she's like this at four!!!

oh, don't set me off on noise

I am a loner by nature and find the constant attention seeking and general annoyance really hard most days

but love them to bits etc etc

re swimming/tumble tots etc pruni, well dd1 cannot do groups at all. She is very sensitive and quite odd imo (dh tells me off for saying she is odd, but she is!). She has to have routine and is very particular and gets VERY annoyed if things change.

Her teacher says she does not mix at school socially but is "so good and obedient" she is a pleasure, whereas I think she is too good and takes things literally so she doesn't do anything wrong and get upset, does that make sense?

I find dd1 runs about at parties chasing people OR will sit on my knee moaning about the noise so social things are a waste of time.

Have you read The Sensitive Child book?

xx

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I will post it to you if you like, I re read it from time to time and am always nodding going, yep yep yep at how much dd1 is described

oliveoil654 at hotmail dot co dot uk if you want it

I get up on work days at 6.30am so I can have 30 mins peace before waking up the house at 7am

and I cannot tell you have RESENTFULL I feel if anyone gets up before 7am and comes downstairs! I am dreadful

but I crave time to myself and do not get it

sigh

Interesting about the IVF thing Pruners.

My boys are IVF, took us 7 years total nightmare to get them during which I spent the entire time planning the perfect childhood and my amazing parenting skills . Came down to earth with a massive bump pretty much on day 1, the feeling that I'm constantly not good enough is often there and actually being a parent is a lot harder than I ever imagined.

Wouldn't have it any other way but you spend so long longing for a family you kind of miss out the preparing yourself for what it'll actually be like bit don't you. I've identified it's cause(the infertility rollercoaster) and acknowledge it and that really helps and my parenting confidence is now increasing although my total incompetance is there for all to see most days

Hope you've got some support re the trying again thing, some of the fertility sites have trying again chat rooms, could be useful.

dd is five and the tantrums and attitude at the moment are just terrible.

it annoys me that she has so much but thinks the fact i have cut her toenail is the end of the world!!

i want to show her the terrible things that other children suffer and that she is soooooooo lucky to be loved and cared for!!!!

sometimes i think i am just rubbish at it.

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