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Original poster

Word for toddler girl private parts...

245 replies

Blessedbethefruitz · 13/10/2023 19:23

Weird question, sorry! Huge searchable history on here, I'm not a troll!

With ds it was easy - willy is freely used across the UK.

But I want dd 20 months to have a word to describe her vulva/vagina, for if she's hurt, needs a wee, has a uti etc. Right now she seems to think it's her bottom as I refer to changing her bottom/nappy. I don't want something ridiculous like flower, or something gross like minge or fanny. What's usual in your home/circles/region? She knows when she needs a 'wee wee' from copying her big brother. I could use that I suppose?

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tobee · 13/10/2023 20:58

I can't stand the twee words for genitals. But I find it fascinating that my no nonsense dm (who is 87) taught sex education at school (she worked in various pastoral care roles) in the 70s and 80s, and in those days , if a child used the correct terms it was a red flag, the child was using a precocious term only a dubious adult would have taught them.

tolerable · 13/10/2023 20:58

front bottom.

User56785 · 13/10/2023 20:59

mondaytosunday · 13/10/2023 20:37

My daughter used to call it her front bottom. She learned the correct words but that made more sense to her.

Yes, my dd calls her head 'elbow'. It makes much more sense to her. And even though she has learnt the correct word for apple it makes more sense to her to call it whiskey. I can't foresee any problems with this whatsoever.

There is no need for people to use the same words for anything. Not if using a different word makes more sense to them.

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SawX · 13/10/2023 21:00

YouAreBeingUnbearable · 13/10/2023 20:41

@Zola1 It seems really odd that someone in your position would say anything that may dissuade people from trying to protect their children, whether you think their reasoning is valid to your specific experience or not.

Maybe not ‘make or break’ but potentially helpful. I wouldn’t be putting any parent off doing all they can to raise a red flag sooner and more clearly if the worst was to happen.

I very very much doubt that person has really sat in court on child sex abuse cases. If they had they would certainly have seen how the defense pounce on any ambiguity in a child's testimony.

violetcuriosity · 13/10/2023 21:01

We use Vulva and Noonie in equal measure.

Iruineditall · 13/10/2023 21:01

weekschart · 13/10/2023 20:22

The absolute worst!

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You say that BUT that is what my (ASD) child has decided to call it - I’d far rather she understands her own anatomy in any way that works for her - that is what will safeguard her. Too many children know certain word s but don’t understand and can’t identify - great if they can but if they can’t it’s an issue, especially for children with SEN

Alltheyearround · 13/10/2023 21:01

Front Bottom makes me giggle. My ex and I used to name cottages we saw on country walks and one of them was nicknamed 'Front Bottom Cottage.'

It's actual name was Bottom Cottage which is almost as funny.

Our village ancestors were sometimes quite literal on the naming front.

Dares someone to name their cottage Vulva Cottage or Vagina Villas.

Sorry, I'll get my coat now.

Alltheyearround · 13/10/2023 21:03

No offence @Iruineditall just my sense of humour (I also have a SEN child so I know that we have to do what works).

Iruineditall · 13/10/2023 21:03

BodegaSushi · 13/10/2023 20:32

Thank you. I think a while ago a post went 'viral' about a kettle girl telling her teacher that her uncle touched her cookie and no one had a clue what she meant. It was a pile of made up shite but so many people ran with it and said nonsense like 'your child will be less likely to be abused if they know the correct words' 🤯

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I doubt it makes abuse less likely but may help to identify it sooner if a child can articulate what is happening, some names though are really just as explanatory as vulva or vagina though I think some posters are just being pedantic

AliasGrape · 13/10/2023 21:04

Ok I’m really baffled and several people have brought it up - what the hell is the connection between the use of the word vulva and Father bloody Christmas?

I use/ have taught my daughter the word vulva because that’s what that part of her body is called - same as I taught her arm/ knee/ nose/ chin etc.

In what possible way is that at odds with talking about Father Christmas? Is calling it a mini or a twinkle or whatever more magical somehow? More festive? Are you only allowed to leave carrots out for the reindeer if you refer to a foofoo?

And yes I use bum and tummy and other non medical terms where they exist and are universally understood (in our part of the world at least) but as this thread proves there isn’t one for vulva and vagina so might as well just use the actual words.

Iruineditall · 13/10/2023 21:04

Alltheyearround · 13/10/2023 21:01

Front Bottom makes me giggle. My ex and I used to name cottages we saw on country walks and one of them was nicknamed 'Front Bottom Cottage.'

It's actual name was Bottom Cottage which is almost as funny.

Our village ancestors were sometimes quite literal on the naming front.

Dares someone to name their cottage Vulva Cottage or Vagina Villas.

Sorry, I'll get my coat now.

😂

Mum2jenny · 13/10/2023 21:06

I’d use ‘girl bits’, a bit twee but understandable

HynieTheLaughingHyena · 13/10/2023 21:07

We use willy for boys, winkle for girls.

They know the proper terms as well. Just like they know boobies are really called "breasts" and their brother Tommy is really called Thomas.

stargirl1701 · 13/10/2023 21:08

We used vulva. Why not?

Tiredmum100 · 13/10/2023 21:08

GoodVibesHere · 13/10/2023 19:39

This is mumsnet where everyone tell you to say vulva.

In real life everyone I know says 'foof'. I mean for years and years it's been foof - even nurses and doctors will know what is meant. This is perhaps regional but c'mon it's better than vulva.

Like bum or bottom. Nobody says 'gluteus maximus' do they.

Even as adults we say foof or 'down there', e.g. if you needed to say 'I'm a bit sore down there' a Dr knows what you mean. Let's be real you wouldn't say my vulva is sore to a friend/Dr or whatever.

I dunno, I went to the GP about some itching. Especially around my clit, so I said exactly that. I'm not embarrassed, I needed it sorted.

blanketsmell · 13/10/2023 21:11

GoodVibesHere · 13/10/2023 19:48

I'd know, because it's a term that is used. In the same way you'd know what a boy meant by willy or winky.

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Ah right. Maybe it's regional? I've never heard it called that before.

MrsTerryPratchett · 13/10/2023 21:11

In what possible way is that at odds with talking about Father Christmas? Is calling it a mini or a twinkle or whatever more magical somehow? More festive? Are you only allowed to leave carrots out for the reindeer if you refer to a foofoo?

Proper lol @AliasGrape

pipindressup · 13/10/2023 21:14

Vulva can't be bothered to waist time thinking up silly names for a body part that has a name already.

blanketsmell · 13/10/2023 21:14

coxesorangepippin · 13/10/2023 19:57

V jay jay

Omg no

LondonQueen · 13/10/2023 21:14

Vulva and vagina, they're not bad words. Similarly, DS can use penis.

Tiredmum100 · 13/10/2023 21:17

Nothingbuttheglory · 13/10/2023 20:18

We used Willy for my son, will be using Minnie for our daughter.

The baby names thread is that way ->

🤣

Bluepolkadots42 · 13/10/2023 21:19

We always called it a Vulva with DD and she knows the outside is Vulva and inside is vagina. It did feel odd at first however it became normal for us v quickly. We chose to do this for reasons other PP have mentioned above. Weirdly I am currently struggling to refer to 1.5yo son's genitals as penis and keep forgetting and saying willy. Not sure why I'm finding it more difficult with him to use correct terminology.

ReadRum · 13/10/2023 21:20

Vulva, vagina, penis, testicles, anus. They don’t need a euphemism becomes there’s nothing ‘bad’ about them.
I started using the Latin terms when I lived in Germany as I couldn’t bring myself to talk to the gynaecologist about my ‘area of shame’, ‘sheath of shame’ or ‘shame lips’ (Schambereich, Schamscheide, Schamlippen), which are the ‘proper’ German names.

blanketsmell · 13/10/2023 21:21

Snugglemonkey · 13/10/2023 20:44

In the worst case scenario, they were sexually assaulted, it needs to be very clear what happened to them. There is also evidence that using correct terminology reduces shame around discussing sex, sexual pleasure, enhances connectedness to one's own body, confidence and body image.

Using euphemisms encourages the idea that talking about a vulva or vagina is wrong, shameful or dirty. Children may well feel it is rude to mention "private parts" and be discouraged from reporting inappropriate touches, or dodgy conversations predators may initiate with them.

Using correct words lays the foundation for healthy adult sexual functioning and the ability to communicate well with sexual partners.

The NSPCC has excellent advice on this topic, as do numerous child protection agencies.

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Thank you very much I shall read up.

Whalewatchers · 13/10/2023 21:22

If I had a girl I'd consider lilly as the female equivalent of willy.

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