there are many threads here preaching a 'holier than thou' message, and I want to say.........

[Psychomum5]

......I am not perfect, I am not the greatest mum ever (altho I really would like to be able to say I am), and I am also not the best person to ask for advice on feeding kiddies the 'perfect' diet........

there are many threads here stating how we feed our DC's, treat out DC's, raise our DC's, and for the most part we all agree....

but surely.....(and I speak a lot for myself here)

sometimes we also LIE!!!



I have my standards, and 75% of the time I try to stick to them, but 25% of the time I either fail, or take my time remembering and so parenting cana be a little slack in these periods.

BUT

when there are threads here, I give advice and sometimes realise that I have 'twisted' the truth somewhat in my favour......

I don;t give my kiddies as much veg as I claim at times....or at least...I find I offer said veg, just they refuse it and it ends in the bin. (Altho that is not the post I would add at times)'

I offer fruit each day....only 3 of them eat with any enjoyment, and the other 2 have suplements.

I give them chocolate every day, and icecream, and pudding (well, that comes under the icecream TBH), they have crisps too most days...........

I have smacked them (altho sinse being here more, I haven;t and even DD1 said the other day that she can;t remember me ever smacking altho I still threaten it for the 'count to three' threat. It works, as I have never got to 3...!

I even allow a take-away each week.....

Oh, and as for chicken.....no idea where it comes from, altho that will be changing soon as the taste is definatley different as I have tested

and...............I drive to school......

please tell me I haven't confessed all and am now going to be pelted with stones....

[franke]

Drive to school - check
sweeties most days - check
crap meat occasionally - check
smacked ds once, okay twice - check
take aways - check

I guess I'm going straight to hell with you psycho - wanna lift?

[Psychomum5]

only on the promise of wine on the way.

at the rate of this thread tho, we'll need a mahooooosive bus to get us there!!!!

[PeatBog]

VS, my dd usually gets clean tights every 3 days. I mean, they don't really have cheesy feet yet, do they?

They always get fish fingers and chips on Fridays.

We walk to school, but I drive to pick them up (because obviously they're too tired to walk/scooter home)

Sometimes we are too rushed forget to brush teeth before school.

They get 2 jelly babies after lunch every day

Can't think of anything else but feel free with the rotten tomatoes

[Joolyjoolyjoo]

Oh wow- can I join??

dd1 came home from nursery and informed me quite firmly that chocolate croissants were NOT considered a healthy breakfast

We drive to nursery, even though it is a 15 min walk away, cos I am always running late

I sometimes give them sweets just so I can have peace

despite my best efforts, they still would choose chicken nuggets over anything I would cook them

and I often shout at them . And last night I threatened to re-home one of them if they didn't play nicely, and asked them to choose which of them was going (I can hear all the child psychologists out there taking a sharp inward breath!!)

[NorthernLurker]

Jooly - did one volunteer? That's when you really want to worry.....

[OrmIrian]

Gawd! I've given up lying on MN psycho Then again no-one would read my posts and think I was.

[princessmel]

Ok I'll join in

My children have Mc Donalds sometimes.

Ds had a fanta on holiday last week.

They have bisciuts in my bed while watching Toon-attic at the weekend. The biscuits stop them from being hungry and making me get up to do breakfast till 9 ish.

Dh buys The Sun.

But we walk to school, don't have froot shoots, eat fruit and veg, get lots of exercise, are a happy NORMAL family.

[Mercy]

lol at this thread - I could be here all afternoon listing everything I do 'wrong'

The worst one for me though is leaving your child to play with only the tv for company while I spend nearly an hour on MN (ie, now )

[Joolyjoolyjoo]

Northernlurker- NO (phew!!) they both started crying and saying they didn't want either of them to go!!

Not as bad as my mum- she told me if I was very naughty, the angels would come and take her away!!!!! She even had a song about a wee girl who didn't appreciate her mum and the angels came and took her away!! Used to have me sobbing!!

[carmenelectra]

Lol at Victoriansqualour and the two cans of lager(it wouldnt be funny if it were wine). Hope you had a fag hanging out your gob too.

When i was 21 wks preg with ds2 we went to Tunisia and id just gone past the sicky stage and fancied alcohol again so i would have a nice big beer at lunchtime and a couple of glasses of wine with my dinner. I did look preg. si must have got plenty of tuts, im sure.

And princess, my dp has The Star. The Sun is ok!

[NorthernLurker]

Jooly - that reminds me of when my big two were much smaller and we were playing a chasing tyoe game - I said to dd1 'I'll eat you up' (where the wild things are anyone?) Dd2 started crying and wailed 'don't eat my sister. I NEED her!'

[carmenelectra]

I tell my 3 yr old nephew that i might eat my ds2 up for dinner as hes so fat and yummy and he made me laugh by saying, dead serious "But you wont have a baby anymore if you eat him!"

I must stop saying this, cos i watched a programme about a cannibal in Japan and it was said that his family always used to jokily tell him they were gonna eat him when he was little. It does worry me.

[talkingmongoose]

Baby had not been bathed for a week, and smells a bit musty.

[donbean]

ahhh how fucking refreshing!

mine have been in front of the telly all day today.
had crisps after dinner.
didnt go to bed till 10 last night...and slept out.

i drive to school.
do not give 5 portions a day.
do not make them clean theor teeth every day.
(6 out of 7)
i shout banshee style at them when im due my period.

i tell them there is a naughty childrens home up the road.........

im not even going to counter balance this posting with a "BUT" we do this that and the other.....i am going to leave my confessions at that.
sound like a bastard of a parent.....i most certainly am not, but im not going to tell you all why, cos i know.

[talkingmongoose]

Oh, and she ate a sausage yesterday. Was quality sausage, though. Waitrose.

[NorthernLurker]

Carmen - I think we all joke threaten to eat to eat our gorgeous offspring - thankfully it really doesn't scar them for life - but eeeek! nevertheless!

Musty baby is ok - it's when they smell of cheese that you need to get down to it!

[NorthernLurker]

donbean - you'll have to work harder than that! Crisps after dinner - got to get them in before breakfast really

[Psychomum5]

oh this is getting better and better

I too do the banshee style screaming when period is due

and DD1 tells the others off in a style that makes me cringe, especially when I realise that she sounds JUST LIKE ME

BUT

this A.M I got lots of pressies and cards talling me I am the best mummy ever, so I must be doing something fairly ok

[carmenelectra]

Im just worried when ds1 cooks and eats someone he has met off the internet when he is older, he blames it on the fact i threatened to eat him and his poor baby brother on toast when he was a child

[donbean]

ok, got one....

hot dog sausages

OUT OF THE TIN.

Ha,

[Psychomum5]

imagine the scar's that 'boysontoast' will emotionally pass on then....

[NorthernLurker]

we had those at half term - I see your hot dogs and raise you the fact that I haven't bought my children any new knickers for about three years and they are reliant on the charity of relatives and the trusty old Disney Princess ones we had when dd1 was 5.

That's 'trusty' though - not 'crusty' - just to be clear

[carmenelectra]

Second hand knickers really is scraping the barrel.

[donbean]

ok,
i raise your trusty crusty old charity knickers,

i bring to the table a christmas present...second hand book given to my ds.
i wrapped it and gave it to my nephew....


THE SHAME.

The kid loved the book tho, my ds wasnt bothered and it looked like new.

[donbean]

you are all disgusted are n't you.....

HA, TRIUMPH