Is my husband's behavior toward my son cause for concern?

[KiwiRefuge]

Apologies in advance for any breaches of etiquette. I'm new to the forum.

I spent the weekend at my parents' place with our 6 mo son to give my husband a bit of space to get some projects done. When we got back, I was doing some stuff in the kitchen while my husband watched the baby, who has a cold and is extra fussy. I let my husband know he could interrupt me if he needed to and that I was happy to take the baby if the crying was getting too much.

When the baby couldn't be soothed, my husband started cursing at him and became tearful with frustration. I offered to step in but he declined. The baby went from fussing to crying at which point my husband shook him a bit (not a serious head-flopping-back-and-forth shake, more like the way you might shake someone's shoulders to 'snap them out' of something.) At that point I took the baby from him and he went upstairs.

My husband is going to have a difficult week at work so I'm considering just getting an AirBnB with the baby to give him some additional space. But I tend to be a pretty catastrophic thinker and don't want to make things worse by overreacting.

If any additional context helps, this is not the first time I've been scared by how my husband handles the baby and we've had a few conversations about it. He'll go long stretches where he'll seem okay, but then something happens and he'll have an extreme reaction out of the blue.

Again, just wondering if I'm overreacting and if staying someplace else for a few days will only make things worse. Thanks in advance for the advice.

And do you know what... If you don't get away from this man your baby would be better off without either of you.
By staying with him you're enabling your husband and condoning his violence.
If something happened to your baby you would be just as responsible as he is.

Morning.
We're just bobbing on here to say that we're so sorry to hear you're going through this, OP.
We hope you don't mind, but when these threads are flagged to us we like to link to our web-guides, which we hope may be helpful. If you'd like to, please do feel free to take a look at our Domestic Violence page.
Very best wishes from all at MNHQ

Has op been back? Almost 200 replies and everyone is saying get baby away from the dh. Hope you act on this @KiwiRefuge

But he needs to be '100 per cent there' if by that you mean 'capable of looking after a baby without resorting to violence'. A single loss of temper can have fatal results. And think about the life you might have if you were not tiptoeing around an angry aggressive man-would it not be much calmer and more pleasant?

OP would be good to know you and baby are safe.

No she hasn’t, it’s very concerning.

OP, please take into account that should any injury occur to your child in future, they will want to know if you were aware of any previous incidents. You need to protect your child, and staying with him could well be seen as failing to do so.

I hope the op came to her senses and has now called the police and had him removed from the home.