Should we pay?!

[Mumlife80]

Ok...so need some advice plz...I was watching my sisters two boys...age 10..and 7...i have a lively 3 yr old and while they were eating at the table my 3 yr old knocked the 7yr olds glasses onto the tiled floor breaking the frame under one of the lens...the cost to repair them is £75 and my partner is steadfast against paying for them while i think we should...my sister i think is expecting us to pay for them...what would you do??...my partner believes that because i was doing her a favour looking after her boys that should warrant not paying...also that our boy is only 3 and didnt know better...he thinks my sister is out of order expecting us to pay!! What do you all think? Thanks

I have sympathy OP as my 2yo DD is obsessed with glasses, and I can see her doing this.

I would absolutely offer to pay if she broke someone's glasses doing it. Although, conversely, if I were on the receiving end and a siblings' child broke my glasses, I wouldn't accept payment.

I think you need to pay. That said I’m surprised at the cost my 10 yo is very happy with the free glasses despite me offering to pay for more expensive ones. Optician says they will replace for free within reason.

all babies are- but they learn never to touch - and by two your child should know that, and certainly by three.

Of course you pay!

And it's not much of an 'accident'. Your 3 yo should know better.

If you are doing too much 'childcare' deal with that separately.

Your DP doesn't sound nice at all.

Mine had NHS glasses and the opticians would replace them when broken. In your situation I would pay to replace them but would ask if we could ask if the cost would be covered by the NHS.

My son has had glasses from the age of 3 he's now 15 he's had numberous repairs. I've never once paid for them to be fixed. She's having you on. I wouldn't do her any favours again.

Absolutely you should pay. Your child is 3 and should know that grabbing at someone's face is not ok

If you babysit too much, then I can understand the frustration but its a separate issue

From the NHS web site

Children under 16 are entitled to an NHS optical repair or replacement voucher. This voucher helps towards the cost of replacing or repairing your child's glasses or contact lenses if they lose or damage them.

The value of your voucher will depend on which part of your glasses needs to be repaired or replaced. This could be:

• one lens
• both lenses
• the front of the frame
• the side of the frame
• the whole frame

Your optician can tell you how much your NHS optical voucher is worth.

I've never had to pay for repairs to my DS glasses so I'd certainly want to check the costs.....

My child does know that, but shockingly - like basically every 2 year old I've every met - isn't a perfect little angel. She's learning, just like OP's 3 year old is. And like I said... I'd offer pay if she caused any dam6. So hoik your judgey pants up elsewhere.

Yes you should pay. Your child was actually quite naughty, it’s not like he’s 18 months old. He broke them and It’s in no way your nephew’s fault. You should definitely pay. I can’t believe your husband thinks you shouldn’t.

To disown your sister and her kids over £75 would be ridiculous. Your DH is massively over reacting.

NHS children's glasses - free repairs.

Of course you should pay if they can't be fixed for free - your child's poor behaviour under your (clearly inadequate) supervision led to the glasses being broken. Your sister is blameless, your nephew is blameless, they are not responsible - you and your son are.

Your 'D'H sounds petty, tight and frankly vindictive trying to punish your sister for expecting you to pay for the damage your son did. I'd be having very strong words with your 'D'H if I was you.

Can you clarify whether these are nhs glasses, when my children were younger like everyone else I never had to pay for any repairs

On balance I think you need to pay but I slightly agree with your husband, I'd your child might do something similar in the future it's too big a risk for you when youre providing free childcare, if would be ridiculous if you had to keep paying out

You should definitely offer to pay, it wasn’t an accident. Even though 3 yr old may not have “known” it wasn’t ok, it’s your responsibility to offer.

My kids have broken their glasses numerous times….. the NHS give kids a voucher for one pair of free glasses and lenses per year, but that only covers the range of “free” NHS glasses. You can choose more expensive frames, but then you pay the extra on top of what the NHS will pay, so £75 is possible.
when they break, NHS will do free repair or replacement, but only up to the value of the original voucher, so if you paid £75 “top up fee” originally, you’d have to pay the same again for a replacement. Not sure how it would work with just replacing the lenses though, as mine have always broken the frames.

My son is forever getting his glasses broken. We have had them repaired numerous times and they had to be completely replaced once. We have never had to pay for this. Or the original glasses (apart from a tenner for a scratch resistant coating).

Tell her she should've gone to Specsavers

sorry, but this is absolutely non negotiable. I have raised more than my fair share of babies - they were not allowed to touch my glasses, and they knew that. Don't make excuses. A two year old should know some very basic hard and fast rules.

But surely it's better for them to teach their child to behave, rather than stopping having their nephews over?

Well I think you should pay, but I think £75 is unreasonable - I just paid £35 total for x2 brand new pairs of children's glasses in specsavers. And I've had childrens frames fixed for free under Nhs.

😳

Bloody hell you've jumped to some conclusions there.

Literally need ten sets of eyes and hands with three year old. Parenting isn't inadequate because an accident happened. Think you've been a bit harsh on the husband too given you don't know him and he may have his reasons for saying what he's said.

But if their child broke a £75 pair of glasses, then they should replace a £75 pair of glasses! Like for like!

If it wasn't your nephew but one of your children's friends on a playmate would you offer to pay up? I think you would.

If your 3 year old is in the habit of ripping peoples glasses off you need to nip that in the bud RIGHT NOW. He could have pulled anybody’s glasses off, and then you should have paid anyway.

it was not an accident.

He thinks it’s funny, the jokes on you, pay up.

My DH is blind as a bat without his glasses. Your partner should check what these things cost, £75 is cheap.

Yikes! Me and DH wear glasses and our children have known since babyhood never ever to touch them let alone grab them and throw them, wtf! You are massively downplaying your 3 year olds actions.