My daydreaming scares my toddler?

[4EyesandBigThighs]

Anyone else’s kids get absolutely panicked when they spot you ‘zoning out’ - I can feel when I’m doing it, and my semi conscious knows when she’s watch me and starts to cry and tell me to stop it but it still takes me a few seconds to come out of it. I just tell her I’m ‘thinking’ as I don’t think she’ll understand daydreaming. But I find it bizarre that we staring blankly at one spot makes her so panicked?!

Hmm, do you zone out a lot? I hardly ever do that, how unresponsive are you?

And how long are you unresponsive for? Is she trying and unable to get your attention? Can see why that's scary for a toddler.

'A few seconds' is subjective I think.

Honestly this doesn't sound normal op. Your spells of zoning out must be extreme/prolonged for a toddler to not only notice but become panicked by it.

I would be makkng an appointment with gp. It sounds a bit like a type of seizure.

That sounds scary. Have you been checked for your absences?

How do other adults describe it? Have you always done it?

OP please get some help.

You shouldn't be zoning out when in charge of a small child for many reasons.

There was an article I read a while back on dreaming due to knowing someone else who does this and sleeps a lot. It has screwed up his life and health.

I agree, something doesn't seem right. It would be a good idea to get checked out for epilepsy.

Have you taken medical advice about this? This does not sound normal. I would be concerned that it is a form of epilepsy.

Absence seizures are often mistaken for day dreaming. Particularly dangerous if they happen whilst crossing the road or driving. I'd get checked out OP.

Are you talking about when you’re so knackered you have little microsleeps? I remember this from uni, I would shudder awake in a lecture. Not had it until I had a baby and didn’t sleep for ages, think it’s your body forcing yourself awake.

If your toddler is noticing it sounds like an absence seizure. Have you ever had medical advice? It's not 'normal' to daydream / zone out to that extent

I’m in my own head a lot and get locked on to things (ASD) but what you describe sounds quite unusual?

Sorry I just see I've automatically assumed toddler re the not understanding daydreaming, how old is she?

Just to add a different perspective - I zone out all the time, eyes unfocused, can still hear everything around. Just very deep in thought/kind of just ...unhook myself from being completely immersed in everything around me for a minute. I could see how that would be confusing/a bit scary to a kid!

(What I mean to say is it's definitely, 100% not me having seizures - so don't worry too much if the comments seem terrifying!)

Most of us daydream but it doesn't take time to come out of a daydream, it's immediate if something or someone needs attention.

It’s definitely not medical, it might be anxiety related though- I’ve never really given it much thought tbh. - like a PP said, I can hear everything that’s going on around me, and I know that I’m zoned out. - it’s not really when she’s trying to get my attention as if she comes up to me or says ‘mummy’ then I come out of it and give her attention - it’s more when she’s sat across the room playing and she just so happens to catch me staring into space and immediately starts panicking and shouting ‘stop it mummy, don’t!’ 🥲

You need to get an urgent gp appointment and discuss this further. You are putting your child in danger both in your home and when out and about. I am surprised that no one else has spotted this already if it is so evident to a small child.

You must look quite scary for her to react like that. Do you blink whilst you're doing it? How fast do you come round?

@BellatrixLestrangesHeatedCurlers quite fast I’m not ‘stuck’ like it and I’m completely aware when I’m doing it, I’m just sort of.. deep in thought? 😂 it’s usually when I am thinking about something specifically. I don’t blink while I do it. DP knows when I’m doing it and he’s not concerned, nor am I.. It’s in no way a danger - it’s not really involuntary.. I wouldn’t just start staring into space while doing something else like cooking, cleaning, talking ect. It’s definitely just a thought thing as it only happens when I’m sat quietly and thinking of something. Like I’ve just done it when think about what to reply to all of this.

but I repeat.. not a danger. Not a seizure. Nothing to worry about. I just don’t get why DD is so frightened of it 😂 maybe it’s the blank stare and no blinking probably does look a bit creepy? 😅

You say it takes you a "few seconds" to come out of it. That's a long time for a toddler so I'm not surprised it's scary for her.
It's not normal OP

I get what you mean! So occasionally you get lost in thought and are thinking about something. I think that’s totally normal! When my DH is wfh I’ll go up and he is staring blankly out the window and then he types something, stares a bit
more, types something. He’s obviously thinking about what he’s doing! When im
writing for work I’ll do the same. And yes, when my dd is playing and im
sat there on the sofa supervising with my cup of tea, my mind will wander onto other things: what to cook, what I need to pack for a trip, what the ending of the book I’m reading will be.. and I probably do appear glazed over!
Its fine to be dreamy as long as you are noticing anything dangerous happening!
As for your toddler being scared..well tbh
id probably just reply “im just thinking about xyz”. Kids don’t get being thoughtful when they are toddlers! She’ll understand when she’s older, my older dc always wander round daydreaming,I generally have to yell, very loudly, 3 or more times
to get them to listen to me. Stuck in their own world!

Sorry I agree with others - zoning out to the point of having a blank stare and no blinking sounds unusual. I have ADHD and daydream a lot but that doesn't happen to me and my children have not been worried.

It might be worth just mentioning it to a GP to see what they think?

That's odd, OP. I mean, don't you find it odd that barely anyone elsenon here can relate to this? I sometimes pause when I'm very tired and trying to concentrate whilst thinking about multiple things all at once & sift through them but that's rare and not zoning out as such. I have only ever seen my toddler concerned when I've accidentally hurt my foot/wrist at home and that was because he noticed I was in pain. They don't normally react this way unless it's really obvious something isn't right IME. Don't you think you're minimising this?