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Original poster

leaving 5 week old , is it to soon?

133 replies

lockdownmummax · 10/02/2023 20:33

My son is 5 weeks 2 days old tomorrow, me and my partner have arranged to go out for Valentine's Day tomorrow, have dinner booked for 5pm and then crazy golf booked for 7pm, planning on going for 1 or 2 cocktails after and to be home for 10ish,
my partners mum is coming over to our house to watch baby and toddler , she is staying the night and will sleep in room with baby and me and my partner will sleep in the other room,
Am I being crazy for doing this?
With my first I actually never had a night out until she was over 1 year old ( covid times)
I'm not going to get drunk just a cocktail or two, and plan on enjoying the nights sleep but if baby is unsettled I will be in the next room, part of me thinks I'm crazy for going out to soon and the other part of me thinks it's only for an evening and I will be in the next room from him through the night?

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mynameiscalypso · 10/02/2023 20:36

I think it's fine. I'm just impressed you have the energy for dinner, crazy golf and cocktails when you have a newborn baby!

onlyoneoftheregimentinstep · 10/02/2023 20:37

Go for it!

Original poster
lockdownmummax · 10/02/2023 20:38

@mynameiscalypso
If someone suggested dinner crazy golf and cocktails to me 2 weeks ago I would have cried just at the thought of it lol,
first 3 weeks where extremely hard, baby was hardly sleeping at night, dr prescribed baby gaviscon which has helped him lots but me and my partner do 1 night each for the night feeds now it has helped us both massively we where like zombies before we tried doing 1 night each lol

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DragonbornMum · 10/02/2023 20:45

Assuming from your post that you're not breastfeeding, so nothing you've described sounds like a bad idea. If you feel ready to leave the baby then it's not crazy at all. Enjoy your night out!

qwertyy1234 · 10/02/2023 23:20

DH & I a similar thing when my baby was around 4 weeks old to celebrate our first wedding anniversary - go for it

Isthisexpected · 11/02/2023 00:09

Personally I think this is so selfish. The fourth trimester is all about baby adjusting to being outside of the womb and not having your comforting smell, touch and heartbeat at all times. To plan to go out for an hour, fine. But the whole evening and then sleep in a different room and drinking alcohol, it's like you both want a night off from being baby's parents already. You've just had a baby! I am flabbergasted at how insignificant baby's needs are to you.

SpinningFloppa · 11/02/2023 00:13

I wouldn’t have done it personally but that’s just me! and I was bf so wouldn’t have been able to

lyla12 · 11/02/2023 00:15

This is not selfish at all, some people are very over dramatic. Go and enjoy yourself x

UsingChangeofName · 11/02/2023 00:18

Tad over dramatic there @Isthisexpected

I mean, at just 5 weeks I think the meal would probably have been enough for me, as I don't do well on lack of sleep, so wouldn't be ready for a full night out like that with a tiny baby, but we are all different, and your baby will be fine.

IneedcoffeeinanIV · 11/02/2023 00:21

It isn't selfish at all. It's one evening and your baby is with your Partners Mum who I'm assuming your more than happy for her to look after your little ones.

Enjoy the time together! Smile

Nosleepforthismum · 11/02/2023 00:22

Isthisexpected · 11/02/2023 00:09

Personally I think this is so selfish. The fourth trimester is all about baby adjusting to being outside of the womb and not having your comforting smell, touch and heartbeat at all times. To plan to go out for an hour, fine. But the whole evening and then sleep in a different room and drinking alcohol, it's like you both want a night off from being baby's parents already. You've just had a baby! I am flabbergasted at how insignificant baby's needs are to you.

Oh get a grip.

OP, have a wonderful time and I hope you enjoy those well deserved cocktails and a good nights sleep!

converseandjeans · 11/02/2023 00:28

@Isthisexpected

Golly that's judgmental!! It's fine OP. I went out for pizza when DD was 3 weeks old with some friends & swim & lunch at a nice hotel the week after. I think I went into town for Christmas drinks when DS must have been 6 weeks.

I think you do what makes you happy. Mine always settled ok & I think that it's good for them to get used to different people settling them down.

N4ish · 11/02/2023 00:32

I wouldn’t have left my baby for so long at that age but only you can know what’s right for you and your baby.

crimsonlake · 11/02/2023 00:35

I would still be at the stage of obsessively looking at my new baby, but of course it's up up you,

kitcat15 · 11/02/2023 00:36

Isthisexpected · 11/02/2023 00:09

Personally I think this is so selfish. The fourth trimester is all about baby adjusting to being outside of the womb and not having your comforting smell, touch and heartbeat at all times. To plan to go out for an hour, fine. But the whole evening and then sleep in a different room and drinking alcohol, it's like you both want a night off from being baby's parents already. You've just had a baby! I am flabbergasted at how insignificant baby's needs are to you.

OMG🙄…. Ignore this OP and enjoy your date night…..my DD went out to a wedding when her baby was 6 days old ( I looked after my GD) …… we had the baby overnight….. all was well….no separation anxiety dramas 🙄

Guavafish1 · 11/02/2023 00:36

Enjoy it!

kitcat15 · 11/02/2023 00:39

lyla12 · 11/02/2023 00:15

This is not selfish at all, some people are very over dramatic. Go and enjoy yourself x

I think some people are just jealous they never get out themselves….so they make out they are ‘earth mother’……and are hugely judgemental …… it’s pathetic really

Adrelaxzz · 11/02/2023 00:39

I wouldn't leave them overnight that is massively weird behaviour. However for a few hours with the proviso you would come home if needed would be grand.

lyla12 · 11/02/2023 00:46

My mum took my baby for a few hours when she was a few days old as I had a terrible labour and my partner and I had hardly slept a wink over they few days, she then had her over night when she was 4 weeks old. The judgement from some people is terrible. It honestly doesn't make you any better of a mother because you don't want anyone having your child

TheFormidableMrsC · 11/02/2023 00:47

Marvellous! Have a fab time!

TheFormidableMrsC · 11/02/2023 00:48

Isthisexpected · 11/02/2023 00:09

Personally I think this is so selfish. The fourth trimester is all about baby adjusting to being outside of the womb and not having your comforting smell, touch and heartbeat at all times. To plan to go out for an hour, fine. But the whole evening and then sleep in a different room and drinking alcohol, it's like you both want a night off from being baby's parents already. You've just had a baby! I am flabbergasted at how insignificant baby's needs are to you.

Oh get a bloody grip 🙄

PinkPantherPaws · 11/02/2023 00:48

Personally I wouldn't have left them at 5 weeks for that long and I feel it's unfair on the baby. Clearly many disagree though as shown on this thread, so you'll never get a consensus if that's what you're looking for.

As for the poster whose dd left her baby overnight with her at 6 days old to go to a wedding...sheesh. That's hardly something to be proud of and pretty crappy parenting whatever way you look at it. I can't imagine why you'd support anyone to leave their days old newborn overnight just to go on a jolly. Poor baby.

TheFormidableMrsC · 11/02/2023 00:50

PinkPantherPaws · 11/02/2023 00:48

Personally I wouldn't have left them at 5 weeks for that long and I feel it's unfair on the baby. Clearly many disagree though as shown on this thread, so you'll never get a consensus if that's what you're looking for.

As for the poster whose dd left her baby overnight with her at 6 days old to go to a wedding...sheesh. That's hardly something to be proud of and pretty crappy parenting whatever way you look at it. I can't imagine why you'd support anyone to leave their days old newborn overnight just to go on a jolly. Poor baby.

Again, get a grip.

PinkPantherPaws · 11/02/2023 00:55

Again, get a grip

Eloquent, well thought out point there @TheFormidableMrsC 😂

No grips needed here...i stand by my post. Feel free to disagree and hand your own newborn off on overnights to all and sundry at less than a week old. I'm comfortable in my views that that's shitty though.

afinishedkiss · 11/02/2023 01:18

Isthisexpected · 11/02/2023 00:09

Personally I think this is so selfish. The fourth trimester is all about baby adjusting to being outside of the womb and not having your comforting smell, touch and heartbeat at all times. To plan to go out for an hour, fine. But the whole evening and then sleep in a different room and drinking alcohol, it's like you both want a night off from being baby's parents already. You've just had a baby! I am flabbergasted at how insignificant baby's needs are to you.

You mad scone.