Why we move babies to their own room?

[FurBabyMum02]

My son is 10 months old, he wakes usually 2-3 times a night, breastfeed and straight back to sleep. I've been thinking about moving him to his own room but I guess I'm not really sure why so am looking for some opinions, what changed when you moved your babies? Is it just a society thing that I feel like I should be doing?

He will start nursery in about a month so I'm thinking if we don't do it now before he starts we will be waiting another few months as I would want him to settle into nursery before having another big change.

So far I'm at, pros-
-personal space back
-can get into bed normally rather than climbing in from the bottom (cot next to bed and no space either side at the mo)
-there's a rocking chair in his room to feed in rather than perching on the end of the bed
-possibility of better sleep but totally unknown
-the cat often comes to see us in the night and wakes us up but waking baby is different as he needs resettling, wouldn't wake him in his own room

Cons-
-would have to go into his room to feed and resettle (but I get out of bed anyway so what's a couple of steps down the hall)
-possibility of worse sleep but totally unknown
-separation anxiety on my part, will I sleep worse not being able to just pear over and know he's ok

I still feel he's so tiny, should he be becoming more separated by now and given his independence a little more and own space or not? Opinions gratefully recieved.

My main reasons for both mine were that it got to the point where we were waking our DC up when we came to bed, when DH got up early for work and even just moving about if we were restless.
Some people have quite strong opinions that if you keep them in your own room for too long they get reliant on you being there at night but to me if that means they sleep better then I don’t have an issue with that. I do suspect that if you wait until they’re over 1 then it’s gets harder as they recognise they’re in a different room and aren’t happy.
Also I have to admit I liked having the space back in my room and being able to read a book or go on my phone before bed without disturbing DC.

For me, I was able to sleep better once I moved them to their own room (around 6 months). By that stage they were making all sorts of little noises, and sometimes more, that didn't necessarily mean they needed me that instant - but I would still alert to them. So we were both more settled through the night in fact, as I didn't disturb them thinking they needed me either.

But it is a very individual thing and I wouldn't necessarily change something that is working just because I thought I was meant to.

The only opinion that matters is yours. How do you want to do things?

Mine went naturally into their own room when they were ready, that is how I wanted to do it. 10 months is still very young, IMO.

I moved DD to her own room at about 13months. The night wakings were killing me, I was so tired, back at work and I knew she was waking for comfort not food. There was protests (mild) on the first night for a few minutes, even less on the 2nd and 3rd and after that, she slept all night and so did I. It was amazing!

Do you not feed laying down? Its a game changer.

I moved both my girls into their own beds around 22 months but still often one of us slept with them. I’m crap with lack of sleep and this way we got more sleeps and the kids were happy. A 10 month old doesn’t need independence from his parents over night so don’t worry about that.

I guess for me it's just that you have to do it sometime. If you do it at 10 months, he won't really be aware of the difference. If you leave it for a few months, an 18-month toddler will definitely be aware and is likely to kick up a big fuss at bedtime!

I didnt move DC 1 or 2 until 19 months, I was breastfeeding and it was easier to have them next to me so I'd wake when they started to stir than have to wait until I heard them fully awake through a monitor.

Both of them went into their own rooms with no issue, I'll do the same for DC3 who is currently 4 months

@AntarcticTern

I guess for me it's just that you have to do it sometime. If you do it at 10 months, he won't really be aware of the difference. If you leave it for a few months, an 18-month toddler will definitely be aware and is likely to kick up a big fuss at bedtime!

This. It's much easier to do when they aren't aware of their surroundings.

We just slept a lot better, as did DS when he moved at 7 months. I was co sleeping but we'd got to the point where he was moving a lot, whacking me etc and I just wanted my own space. And was desperate to establish some better sleep before returning to work. We also did some gentle sleep training and got rid of the night feed gradually. We are currently on holiday and all in the same room and we wake him up when we go to bed and he wakes us up when he's moving around/stirring etc. I also got sick of having to climb round the bedside cot (which he never slept in, he always ended up in with me). I don't think it matters though, do what suits you. This is all you can ever do with babies as long as you have some basic safety precautions etc in place.

I guess for me it's just that you have to do it sometime hmm, we didn't. They did it themselves with zero drama.

We moved Ds around 12 months.
That was went I decided I was going to stop all overnight feeds.
So from then I fed last thing in his bedroom, overnight only water if he woke, and then first thing in our room. Gradually dropped breastfeeds over the next 6 months.

Now at almost 2, he’s in own room, goes to sleep in there, and usually joins us to co sleep sometime between 3-6am still.

I moved my DTs at 8 weeks as they’d outgrown their next to me crib. They used to keep each other awake by kicking and fighting (well, as much as 8 week old babies can do!) and none of us were happy sleeping.

Probably pure coincidence, but they started sleeping in their own cots but shared room. 5 hour stretch initially, then a few weeks later the whole night. They’d sleep through the other twin waking up, it was glorious once I’d figured out that they were actually sleeping and I’d not passed out due to exhaustion and left them starving It was terrifying initially, but they were right next door, we had angelcare sensor monitor things, and they were absolutely fine. I started sleeping better as I wasn’t scared of rolling out of bed and crushing them, or a dog climbing in with them (which never happened, it was just a fear!) and I felt like I’d reclaimed a tiny bit of my life just for me.

It’s totally against all guidelines, I’m not encouraging it for anyone else, but it worked really well for us.

My 20 month old is still in with us (well to be fair mostly in with me, DH quite often sleeps in the other room which is also his office).

For us it was purely practical, when I was pregnant I’d imagined the beautifully decorated nursery that I’d move baby into at 6 months as I just thought that’s what you did. But then lockdown happened and decorating plans went by the wayside, DH had to work from home with all his piles of equipment that have taken up our entire second bedroom, and DD would only sleep when cosleeping well beyond 6 months. We managed to get her into her cot for at least most of the night once she turned one, but still in our room and to be honest I like having her there. She sleeps better these days but I still find it easier just to be able to shush her from the bed than have to get up and go into her and if she’s ill or really teething I can just bring her into bed with me. I love that ‘hi mama’ is the first thing I hear in the morning.

We are currently finally sorting out the second bedroom for us to move into, hopefully leaving her settled in the room she’s used to, but I’m not in any rush really.

Moved my first at about 2 I think, my second was later, probably 3. Years, that is. Basically when they were both ready and asking for their own room

I can't sleep with any noise at all so
In order for me to function properly I need sleep! We all slept better in separate rooms.

Personally I slept much, much better once my children moved out of our room. And it was something I desperately needed!! I moved them as soon as was compatible with the advice at the time (and to be honest, with my second it may have been slightly sooner). But it will be different for everyone. You don't have to!

We did it around 7 months. Very noisy babies, and a snoring husband meant we would all wake each other up!! The babies slept through 12 hours so we all had much better sleep. Just now need to try and move the husband to his own room so I can finally get some peace!!

Space was a big factor - DD’s cot did fit in our room, but not well, it blocked a chest of drawers so was very inconvenient.

We were also waking her up when we went to bed - she was over 6 months so we’d put her to bed then go downstairs, and then end up waking her later. So it wasn’t working for any of us.

I moved mine into their own rooms at 8 weeks, 2 weeks and 4 weeks respectively. They were in the bedroom next door, no monitors needed, slept beautifully. If they cried I heard them.

I might be weird but I can’t imagine anything worse than having a baby in my bedroom with me for 10 months or more! How do you have sex/read a book/get a good night’s sleep?

We still have our lo in cot in our room at 13 months, sleeping well except when ill.
We were going to do nursery first, she's been mostly ill ever since, by the time that stops she'll probably be teething again! Aiming to move before 18 months on advice received here not to leave it too late. But we love having her in our room, she doesn't need to cry if she needs us, we don't have to get up if we want to check on her.
Do what works for you, but do factor in the nursery bugs, there may be a lot of noisy snotty breathing and wakes for calpol/nappies/tlc for a while after starting nursery.

I didn't move DD until 15 months, she didn't sleep in a cot until 9 months though.
It worked for us, I was BF and wanted her close to me all the time. They are little for such a short time, I am in no rush.

We've never had any sleep drama though, just taken her lead. At 2.5 she rarely needs to sleep with me, only when ill and rarely wake at night. She is a night owl and doesn't go to sleep very early but sleeps in late. I believe in trusting your instincts with this.

Moved DC1 at 8 months and DC2 at 10 months. They were getting too big for Next To Me plus I wanted to do some sleep training. At both points, it was the right time for me as the lack of sleep was getting to me and I was close to losing my mind. It was so nice to be able to have some downtime before bed, simple stuff like apply face cream and read a book without worrying about waking the baby. With DC2, he actually prefers his own bed now rather than co-sleeping with me. We wanted to reduce night feeds too and encourage them to sleep through the night. If you are planning to keep on breastfeeding during the night, might be best to wait until later?

Once we converted the cot bed to a toddler bed, whenever DC1 woke up in the middle of the night, she always ran to our room and we coslept. DC1 currently sleeping with me now as she’s scared of the dark and DC2 now has her room. Once DC2 is old enough, we are hoping they can share a room.

I've just moved my daughter at 9months because she had outgrown her next to me crib and starting to pull herself up so was worried about safety. However, I've also got a double mattress on her bedroom floor and I'm sleeping in there with her.

I breastfeed and partially co-sleep and it just all means we get plenty of sleep. I wasn't ready to leave her completely on her own yet so this is a compromise. We couldn't fit another bigger cot in our room and it felt like a better way to get her used to sleeping in her own room rather than ours. It's early days but it's working well. It feels like we've got our space back. Me and DH can sit in bed and watch tv together for a bit without having to worry about disturbing her. When im ready to sleep I hop into her room. My plan is to start leaving her until her first wake up around 3am but I'm in no rush to leave her completely.

My priority is us all getting plenty of sleep and not battling to get her to sleep/back to sleep every night when she wakes when I've got an easy solution which works. But I know this doesn't work for everyone and I think that's what influences peoples decisions.

I have always kept mine until at least two years old. Ds2 was born when my twins were 12months so I had all three in my room. A cot bed for twins and a space saver cot for ds.
I just like having them in with me when they are little and don’t see the need to move them.

I think it was a sign of wealth and status historically that people were able to not live in one room altogether?

I've moved mine into her own room but have gone with her in a single bed next to the cotbed. This is because my husband was moaning at how quiet we have to be when we get in bed/roll over/want to use the ensuite in the night etc so we don't disturb her and how loud the pink noise is for her. She's 9 months. I expect I'll stay with her until she's a toddler!