Help! Don't understand how toddler can do a full day out without a pushchair

[Rosebud1302]

Hi all,

I have a real internal conflict in my head about the whole pushchair situation. I know, silly thing to worry about in the grand scheme of life but I'm struggling with it.

My son is nearly 3 and a half. Now obviously for shorter trips he walks, goes on his bike etc. That is all fine. But I am really struggling with how he is meant to cope with full days out without it. He simply won't manage walking all day. I know this for a fact! I mean, I even struggle as an adult but I don't understand what that transition period is between being young enough to have a pushchair and being old enough to cope with a full day out is?

When I say full days out I mean a visit to a city using trains/buses to get there and back, walking round visiting place, then getting home and walking from the station to home. Or a full day at the zoo which again will mean public transport, a walk to and from home and walking round a zoo.

I just don't understand how he will manage that but also I feel like everyone will judge me if I bring a pushchair. I don't have a younger child so there isn't a buggy board etc.

Can anyone let me know what they did for full days out when their kids were his age? Carrying him isn't an option for more than a few minutes due to a bad back. I also don't want to just not go out with him because I adore taking him out and he loves it too. But the tired tantrums if I made him walk all day wouldn't be fun!

Thank you :)

I've got 3DC all relatively close together. Obviously didn't have to think about this for the older 2 as had buggy/buggy board. I have no idea what I did with DC3 as by then I didn't care less what anyone thought.

All mine were good walkers most of the time but having a buggy can make life easier in lots of ways. I also sometimes it helped even if DC doesn't go in it. You don't have to carry anything so you're less tired and sometimes DC are happier walking along holding the buggy rather than hand.

Mine are all secondary age now and I don't miss navigating shops with a buggy but I do miss having somewhere to chuck all the bags.
My only useful bit of parenting advice is to ignore any sort of judging and do what works for you.

@Rosebud1302 I let my child use the stroller past 4 years old if we were going for days out. It depends on the child’s size as well, some can get away with using it a lot longer.

@HelloDulling

yes it's tiring, but not impossible

Now that’s a slogan for a great day out.

Brilliant 😂😂😂😂 this really tickled me

I ditched the pushchair at 18 months, but I was sick of dragging it round, much easier without.

You are telling us that you’re 18 month old would walk around a city centre or zoo all day and not complain that their legs were tired?

Honestly days out without a pushchair are so much easier.
Yes we use the car instead of public transport but as they are sat down in the transport it makes no difference.

This post just emphasises the point that people who drive everywhere have no clue.

Public transport almost always involves some distance from station/bus stop to your destination. It operates to a timetable so you may need to hurry to catch a bus or train on a different schedule to toddler walking. You have to carry all your stuff with you, no leaving spare clothes in the car.

And you may not always get a seat. I have definitely had people not offer me a seat with my 4 year old struggling to stand, a 2-3 year old would have been even harder.

With the zoo example I probably would have either:
Taken the buggy
Not stayed the whole day
Gone to a smaller animal farm type place

Is it honestly normal to use a pushchair for a 3.5year old outside of MN?!

Teach him to walk FFS. My son was walking 3 miles regularly by that age. What exactly are you trying to prove by keeping him in the pushchair? If he doesn't learn to be without it, he's not going to want to walk and run around is he? My daughter isn't quite 2 and the pushchair only ever gets pulled out on the rare occasion she needs a daytime nap.

At this age I just had a cheap umbrella stroller. I took it and used it to carry all the stuff you need for a toddler day out - because DS often surprised me and didn't use it!

But if he did want to sit in it I had no issue.

I did have comments - he's a summer born and started school at 4yrs and 3 weeks old.

But I just said as an adult I can manage my walking and plan to sit when I need to. He's 3. He's doing what I'm dictating and if I get it wrong it's there if he wants/needs it.

@horsesanddrywhitewine

Is it honestly normal to use a pushchair for a 3.5year old outside of MN?!

Teach him to walk FFS. My son was walking 3 miles regularly by that age. What exactly are you trying to prove by keeping him in the pushchair? If he doesn't learn to be without it, he's not going to want to walk and run around is he? My daughter isn't quite 2 and the pushchair only ever gets pulled out on the rare occasion she needs a daytime nap.

This is not even true I used the pushchair till mine was just turned 4 She walked miles even when I bought the pushchair She also walked miles at 4 when we stopped using it and she walks miles now at 8 So yes she was taught to walk Dear me

@horsesanddrywhitewine

Is it honestly normal to use a pushchair for a 3.5year old outside of MN?!

Teach him to walk FFS. My son was walking 3 miles regularly by that age. What exactly are you trying to prove by keeping him in the pushchair? If he doesn't learn to be without it, he's not going to want to walk and run around is he? My daughter isn't quite 2 and the pushchair only ever gets pulled out on the rare occasion she needs a daytime nap.

So your toddler will walk a mile to a train station, stand on the train, transfer onto a bus/underground, spend the day looking around museums or a zoo, do the journey in reverse and walk the mile home from the station?

Or would they get in the car and ride to the museum?

Do whatever suits you regardless of what others might think. However, I will say that the more they walk at this age the easier it is. My DS didn't have the opportunity to get in a buggy on days out at that age. His older sister (by 2 years) got her first wheelchair when he was 2.5 and I couldn't push a wheelchair and a buggy (previously they'd both been in a double buggy). So the only option was for him to walk. He managed.
My DH runs a walking group and we've had a 4 year old do 5 - 6 mile walks with us - and they weren't from a hiking type family.

@horsesanddrywhitewine

Is it honestly normal to use a pushchair for a 3.5year old outside of MN?!

Teach him to walk FFS. My son was walking 3 miles regularly by that age. What exactly are you trying to prove by keeping him in the pushchair? If he doesn't learn to be without it, he's not going to want to walk and run around is he? My daughter isn't quite 2 and the pushchair only ever gets pulled out on the rare occasion she needs a daytime nap.

And on our days out, we regularly walk several times 3 miles. If you want to limit yourself to 3 miles on a day out and not be more adventurous, fine for you. Other people might like to get around a bit more at something faster than toddler snail pace.

@horsesanddrywhitewine

Is it honestly normal to use a pushchair for a 3.5year old outside of MN?!

Teach him to walk FFS. My son was walking 3 miles regularly by that age. What exactly are you trying to prove by keeping him in the pushchair? If he doesn't learn to be without it, he's not going to want to walk and run around is he? My daughter isn't quite 2 and the pushchair only ever gets pulled out on the rare occasion she needs a daytime nap.

@horsesanddrywhitewine I agree!

And in other countries, like France/Hungary/Japan (those are the ones I've personal experience of), I'm told here that people carry their 3-4 year olds around in a sling!
As if

So your toddler will walk a mile to a train station, stand on the train, transfer onto a bus/underground, spend the day looking around museums or a zoo, do the journey in reverse and walk the mile home from the station?

Or would they get in the car and ride to the museum?

OP is talking about a 3.5 year old, not a toddler, and yes mine was regularly walking 10K on days out at that age. He was also walking a mile to and from nursery every day from age 2.5, so was used to it. We don’t own a car.

Use a pushchair for as long as you want to, but I’m not sure why the pushchair fans think the rest of us are lying.

My daughter isn't quite 2 and the pushchair only ever gets pulled out on the rare occasion she needs a daytime nap

And how often do you pull out the car?

Ditched the pushchair at 18 months Well my DS1 was only walking at 17 months. Can't remember when he stopped using the pushchair, but DS2 was definitely using it in his preschool year - he loved a quick nap while on the pick up for DS1.

DS1 (now 15yo) is doing DofE gold expedition next month - his walking skills are fine.

Funnily enough I can’t even remember when we stopped using the pushchair 🤷🏼‍♀️
My most active toddler who didn’t like to sit still at all is now the most lazy teenager who would barely move from his bed if given half a chance!

For us it is also about time, my 2 year old can walk to nursery but it ends up a 45 min round trip Vs 20 if I put him in the buggy. So I do it on a nice day if I have time but mostly I need to get to work!

horsesanddrywhitewine
Is it honestly normal to use a pushchair for a 3.5year old outside of MN?!

Teach him to walk FFS. My son was walking 3 miles regularly by that age. What exactly are you trying to prove by keeping him in the pushchair? If he doesn't learn to be without it, he's not going to want to walk and run around is he? My daughter isn't quite 2 and the pushchair only ever gets pulled out on the rare occasion she needs a daytime nap.“

🏅

@Classicblunder

For us it is also about time, my 2 year old can walk to nursery but it ends up a 45 min round trip Vs 20 if I put him in the buggy. So I do it on a nice day if I have time but mostly I need to get to work!

Well, indeed. And I suspect that if you said “so I drive” rather than “so I walk with the buggy”, nobody would even bat an eyelid.

Mine could do the walk back from nursery at 2, but it would have taken much longer with a whiny tired child. Add in bad weather, dark nights, busy roads and needing to pick up other children and the pushchair becomes the most practical option. What’s the advantage of not? So that another parent on the same nursery run doesn’t think “ mine were well out of a buggy by that age” as they whizz past sat on their arse in a Range Rover?

@HelloDulling

yes it's tiring, but not impossible

Now that’s a slogan for a great day out.

Comments like this are why I love MN

I was sad to see the buggy go, it's so useful for dumping coats etc in.
People get so weird about them. SIL was alway smug that they ditched it at 18 months conveniently ignoring the fact that they drive everywhere and were still giving DN shoulder rides at 7.

@horsesanddrywhitewine

Is it honestly normal to use a pushchair for a 3.5year old outside of MN?!

Teach him to walk FFS. My son was walking 3 miles regularly by that age. What exactly are you trying to prove by keeping him in the pushchair? If he doesn't learn to be without it, he's not going to want to walk and run around is he? My daughter isn't quite 2 and the pushchair only ever gets pulled out on the rare occasion she needs a daytime nap.

AHH ffs, why did no one tell me this?!

We used the pushchair for the trek home from nursery until DS was 3.5. That must be why he still bum shuffles his way around the world at 15!! Oh no wait... You're speaking shite 💩🤣

Is it honestly normal to strap a child into a car at 3.5? Only on MN.

And in other countries, like France/Hungary/Japan (those are the ones I've personal experience of), I'm told here that people carry their 3-4 year olds around in a slinggrin!
As if grin

I live in Tokyo and walked home from preschool with my 3.5yo on my back in a sling today... I walked with my friend who also had her 3yo on a sling, on her front!

I promise, we're not lying!

Mine used a lightweight buggy on long days out until they were 4ish. Totally normal.

Youngest is now 6 and I sometimes wish we still had it just to chuck all the coats and bags in.