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Original poster

Help! Don't understand how toddler can do a full day out without a pushchair

211 replies

Rosebud1302 · 31/01/2022 22:45

Hi all,

I have a real internal conflict in my head about the whole pushchair situation. I know, silly thing to worry about in the grand scheme of life but I'm struggling with it.

My son is nearly 3 and a half. Now obviously for shorter trips he walks, goes on his bike etc. That is all fine. But I am really struggling with how he is meant to cope with full days out without it. He simply won't manage walking all day. I know this for a fact! I mean, I even struggle as an adult but I don't understand what that transition period is between being young enough to have a pushchair and being old enough to cope with a full day out is?

When I say full days out I mean a visit to a city using trains/buses to get there and back, walking round visiting place, then getting home and walking from the station to home. Or a full day at the zoo which again will mean public transport, a walk to and from home and walking round a zoo.

I just don't understand how he will manage that but also I feel like everyone will judge me if I bring a pushchair. I don't have a younger child so there isn't a buggy board etc.

Can anyone let me know what they did for full days out when their kids were his age? Carrying him isn't an option for more than a few minutes due to a bad back. I also don't want to just not go out with him because I adore taking him out and he loves it too. But the tired tantrums if I made him walk all day wouldn't be fun!

Thank you :)

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User48751490 · 01/02/2022 07:19

I still have a buggy under the stairs exactly for those types of trips. DS last used it just before he turned 4yo. Definitely needed it.

It will stay there until he starts school.

Howeverdoyouneedme · 01/02/2022 07:19

Ignoring the entirely irrelevant comment that people in other countries don’t have their 3 year olds in a pushchair, take the pushchair. I don’t use a car and pretty much always take a pushchair for my 3.5 year old. He can walk fine, but it’s useful for him to hop into, I can carry stuff under it, my other children can stick their coats on it etc. I promise you, no one cares what you’re doing with your children and one day you simply won’t need it anymore, but no need to make your life harder.

avocadotofu · 01/02/2022 07:26

We still take the ours for our 3 year old. We live in London and he wouldn't be able to manage walking for the distances we travel. I really wouldn't worry about it!

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HavfrueDenizKisi · 01/02/2022 07:35

Mine are older now but it really does work without a pushchair when you are ready.

Typical day into london for eg:
Walk to station, sit on train,
Walk through station to tube, sit on tube
Walk to attraction, get in, toilet stop and snack/coffee
Walk around attractions etc

You get the idea. The day is made up of many rest stops. Plus you allow time for a slower walk.

I get it, pushchairs are useful, they store loads of stuff etc but at some point it has to go. The kids cope. Mine rarely complained.

hellosunshineagainx · 01/02/2022 07:37

My 2.5 year old hasn't had a pushchair for ten months. We got a little scooter thing for him which was good but past 3 months or so he hasn't needed it and can walk quite far. We do a lot of walking as a family though as have a dog

DaisyDozyDee · 01/02/2022 07:41

We used a combination of a scooter and a toddler carrier to manage these days out. Get a buggy/scooter lock though, then you’re not stuck carrying it around all day.
You just need to find whatever solution gets you through the day with a guarantee that you can get home relatively stress-free.

Northernsoullover · 01/02/2022 07:42

I used a stroller right up until my son turned 4. This wasn't some arbitrary cut off point. Just that as an August 31 baby, I didnt think his street cred would be served if I dropped him off at reception in the stroller Grin

Zonder · 01/02/2022 07:44

What's wrong with using a pushchair at 3?

Whitewolf2 · 01/02/2022 07:47

Just take the pushchair, all children are different, mine loved being able to rest when needed, they’d have used the pushchair forever if possible, despite also being very active! Only idiots would judge you.

INeedNewShoes · 01/02/2022 08:01

I agree with others that a good 3 wheel scooter is helpful for this.

Our local Zoo is enormous and loads of kids use scooters there.

Zonder · 01/02/2022 08:10

Check beforehand about scooters. Our local national trust places don't allow scooters.

PinkSyCo · 01/02/2022 08:12

I just took a buggy. Fuck what anyone else thinks. I was actually devastated when my children grew out of their buggies because they’re also so handy for shoving all your paraphernalia in/on.

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 01/02/2022 08:12

@Zonder

Check beforehand about scooters. Our local national trust places don't allow scooters.
Our local zoo is no scooters as the paths are gravel (not to mention the crowds at busy times...)
Original poster
Rosebud1302 · 01/02/2022 08:14

Thank you so much everyone for the replies you have made me feel better! Believe me it isn't for lack of wanting it - I'm actually very excited for the day I don't have to bring the pushchair as it's a bit of a pain (apart from storage of course) but I just can't see him managing those full on days yet.

He absolutely does lots of walking in shorter bursts. We have a dog (but he often rides his bike on dog walks), we go into our town, to shops etc etc but like someone else said I don't really want to avoid those fun full days out just because he can't walk the whole day yet.

I don't know why it makes me think people judge me I really know I shouldn't care but I guess I don't want people to think I'm raising my son to just sit all the time (although I know that isn't true). Silly I know.

Oh and the comment about how I should be able to cope with a day out did make me giggle. I'm perfectly able to and I also work in a job where I'm outside walking all day pretty much! I was being flippant and saying if my feet are sore at the end of a full day of walking then I'm not surprised his are.

I'm going to try and care less what people think!

OP posts:
RavenclawsRoar · 01/02/2022 08:15

I doubt anyone would notice/judge. As others have said, a lightweight buggy is a godsend. Just encourage him to walk mostly but if he gets really tired, he has the option to sit. I have a double buggy for my toddler and baby, but half the time the toddler walks and my 4yo sits in it! As pp have said, kids vary hugely in their willingness to walk and I really wouldn't make it a battle.

20viona · 01/02/2022 08:16

I'm surprised you can get a 3.5 year old in a pushchair, we bought a new one for my daughters 2nd birthday In July and it's a been used a handful of times she walks everywhere. Obviously she will ask to be picked up occasionally but that's fine in short periods.

firstimemamma · 01/02/2022 08:19

My child is 3 and a half now. About 6 months ago we took him to London for the day and he just walked, no issues. We went to the shard, parks, restaurant, south bank. Zero issues. It never occurred to me there would be.

SuperSleepyBaby · 01/02/2022 08:20

Why make life hard for you and him?

I brought the buggy for days out at the zoo etc and mine happily sat for a while at age 5 for a break and then went back to running around.

My eldest is 12 now and well able to walk for miles. My youngest is 3 and I have no plans to get rid of her buggy anytime soon!

You really have to not care what people think. Most people you pass could not care less - you are just a background person in their lives! If you meet an occasional person who does judge - then put the focus on them and feel a bit sorry for them for being unkind.

firstimemamma · 01/02/2022 08:21

Rather than envisioning it as a full day of walking could you try to break it into chunks. E.g train to the zoo - sitting down, little sit down at a cafe etc.

gogohm · 01/02/2022 08:23

I used it much longer, my eldest is autistic so unpredictable, my younger dd was plain lazy. Got rid of it when they were 4&6 until then I would sometimes have bags in it or a dolly, sometimes one or other and sometimes the younger sitting on the elders lap, thankfully it was a metal, well engineered peg perago.

Youngstreet · 01/02/2022 08:24

We always took the buggy for long days out until dc were at least 4.

When dgc was 8 we took him to Disneyland and after a very long day he said Granny I don’t know how to lift my feet up.
I knew exactly what he meant. A 3 year old would never have coped.

gogohm · 01/02/2022 08:26

Ps they rent large buggies at places like Disneyland because so

Youngstreet · 01/02/2022 08:27

@gogohm

Ps they rent large buggies at places like Disneyland because so
That’s worth knowing for dgc no. 2. Thank you.
HPandTheNeverEndingBedtime · 01/02/2022 08:30

@rosebud1302 remember that there are plenty of toddlers and preschoolers who use a pushchair when they are far older than they 'should' be, some of them may well have physical needs that haven't been diagnosed yet as they are so small. Therefore nobody should be judging anybody.

My Dd often moaned about feet hurting after a long walk as a preschooler, I put it off as normal tiredness, she was still complaining at 5 so I took her to the Dr's who brushed it off. Still moaning at 7 and I was eventually referred to a specialist. She has something called Severs disease which is growth related and common in very tall, active children where the growth plates don't grow at the same rate meaning alot of pain in the foot and having to avoid high impact activity during growth spurts. So I'm glad I used the pushchair longer than I 'should' as it could have caused her more problems. She's a 5 foot 8, 12 year old now, the Severs has gone.

MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 01/02/2022 08:31

@HotPenguin

You need to build him up gradually to get him used to longer distances. I used to let mine walk alongside the pushchair and then put them in when they got tired.
Yes,this. We used the buggy until 4 as I didn't drive then so it was mostly for shopping and for ds to hold on to.