Honest opinion would you work if you didn't have to?

[LifesTooShortYOLO]

No horrible comments please 🥲
I've had the privilege of being a stay at home mum as my husband is in a well paid job so it has allowed us to do that.
Previous to having my son I worked full time.
My DS is starting school in September and I have been looking at little part time jobs to give me something to do whilst DS is at school. I thought that I'm going to have a lot of spare time on my hands as me and DS do everything together every day so I figured I needed something to focus on and have some sort of routine and structure while he is at school.
I have been offered an interview for 2/3 days of 4 hour shifts during the week days.
What would you do?
Would you work if you DIDN'T have to? Honestly? And what would be your reasons for or for not?
Thank you for any help and advice ☺️

No.

I'm a SAHM and plan to stay that way.

You need a job so you can be financially independent. Kids will not be kids forever and its nice to have a career and a life of your own.

@LifesTooShortYOLO I work full time. Still get plenty of time with DS in the holidays. Lots of special time, we are very very close and he is almost 11

Yes. I want to support my children myself.

I was a sahm for 14 years. I was lucky that I had a choice. I very much enjoyed it for probably the first 10 years although I was very heavily involved in volunteering in a role that was very stimulating and closely related to my career. At times (well, for a couple of years) I spent approximately 3 days a week involved in this role. I then did a hugely interesting masters over 2 years. However, by the end, I was bored to tears and needed to find a job for my sanity and sense of self worth. I was very lucky that my old employer remembered me and offered me opportunity to retrain and then a job. I now work 3 days a week in a job that I largely enjoy, pays ok and find purposeful. (It help that there is a national shortage of people trained in my profession which made it much easier to get back to work than it might otherwise have been).

Being mortgage free does offer up more freedoms that others can't take advantage of. I have been a SAHM for 14 years, have two DC with additional needs, and two without. I have lots to fill my days as it is without a paid job. Constantly busy and have to squeeze everything into those six hours. It isn't easy.

I practice piano after all chores/admin is done. Have a dog to walk. Lunches and dinners to prep. I enjoy reading too during the day as it's lovely and peaceful.

Do what you feel is best OP.

Nope. I would read, wal, swim and paint.

I’m about to go back to work after several years as a SAHM. We have no need for me to work financially and it will definitely make life more stressful. But tbh I have been bored since the DC went to school. I want to stretch my brain and and hobbies or volunteering haven’t quite hit that spot. Also I have DDs and want them to see me working, iyswim.

However - if I had a hobby or charity interest I was passionate about and found fulfilling, I’d probably do that instead of returning to work.

I would definitely work. I'm a single parent who works in the NHS and my daughter is 3. I'm no spring chicken, but I've just been accepted on an OU Social care degree. I like the sense of achievement that I get from working and also the financial independence.. If I was in the financial position where I could afford the luxury of not working, I still would.. My brain wouldn't be stimulated enough by not working. If you don't want to work, perhaps you could study and retrain to do something really worthwhile and rewarding.

Yes. Totally. I like working. If one of us had to stay home, it wouldnt be me.

Yes I would because I genuinely love my job and get great fulfilment out of it. I don't love it all day, every day; it's hard work, but it's in an area I'm very interested in and deeply passionate about; it's challenging and makes me think and there's enough variety that it's never boring. It's not the kind of job that others ever want to talk about with me and that's fine because it's a demanding job and I enjoy shutting off from it at the end of the day but I wouldn't ever not want to work.
I also like my financial independence certainly and I like knowing that if I had to, I could take care of my family without my partner's financial input, if I had to.
I also love that I'm setting my child a fine example that it is possible to find something you both love and are good at and use that to make your money. My DH and I are very lucky that we both love our jobs and enjoy what we do (polar opposites to each other) and that our children will see us work hard for the things we have but that we don't come home every night sulking because work is so miserable to us because we only do it because we have to. My parents both always hated their jobs and only ever worked because they had to (still do) and I always remember thinking what was the point of all this... Go to school to get a job that pays the bills but you spend the vast majority of your time miserable because you hate what you do and even when you are not at work, you're dreading going back the next day. It just seemed such a miserable existence to me and that this misery was just a given in life. I'm thrilled to find out it's not a given at all. And to be clear; I don't earn tonnes of money by a long shot and I'm actually part of a corporate, middle manager level position in the NHS so it's not like I'm talking about finding a highly lucrative, extremely rare job that's only open to a very select few people.... But I still love it.

Yes I do. I love my job, I love my headspace and I love bringing money to the table as such.

I do.

I love my job, and I reckon even more so because I know I can quit and still be ok. I perform better too as I'm there because I want to be.

Try it and see how you feel. As you don't need the money, you can look for something that contributes to your happiness. You could also volunteer. I do and I've met the kindest human beings.

No, I'd volunteer. Volunteers are generally shown to be the happiest in happiness surveys! Plus I'd feel bad taking a paid job away from someone who needed it.

I have been looking at little part time jobs to give me something to do

God I loathe this kind of description. Its like it's written straight from the 1950's.

If you want 'something to do' and don't need the money, get a hobby. No need to take a 'little part time job' which from the way you've described it doesn't sound like it has much going for it.

To be frank, if your dh upped and left you, 8 hours a week isn't going to do you much good anyhow so I wouldn't bother.

If on the other hand, you want a career, want a challenge, want to use your skills and improve them, want to be financially independent, then train or study and think of your long term goals.

Yes. I've been a sahm and loved it but lost myself a little too, too much boring housework and not enough me using my brain. I would ideally like to do part time, I would take the job if I were you , you're in a position to change your mind but with no dc at home and dh at work I would get very bored very quickly. The financial aspect and a bit if pride and self worth also come into it for me.

I’m a primary teacher so definitely don’t do that for the money - it’s a vocation. However, even if I didn’t I’ve my job I wouldn’t give up my financial independence or pension. Seen far too many women get screwed over that way.

I’d also eat far too many biscuits if at home. Teaching is great for skipping meals, if nothing else!

It’s a simple equation for me. Does it( in this case a job) give more than it takes? When you have a high earning partner, and have been out of the job market a while, the chances are you won’t earn much, so for me, it needed to give a hell of a lot of stimulation and personal satisfaction , to compensate for the upheaval to make sense. I have come to the conclusion, that job doesn’t exist.

The thing is op. Children grow up fast. As they get older they don’t want you hanging round all the time, the older they get the less respect they have for it, they respect more you and them having independence. You don’t want to be that parent who it’s all about their kid.

It’s a good time to start modelling independence, a life other than waiting to be with them. And the longer you’re out of the workplace the harder it is to get back in.

You’ve not said other than the mortgage has paid off how financially stable you both are, as in are you married to daddy warbucks and if your husband was unable to work or if you split would you be fine financially, is yout pension sorted etc or of something did happen if you’d be financially very vulnerable. That always has to be a huge factor in the decision, not am I missing “special time” by working a few hours a week.

Yes. I enjoy my job, it contributes to society, I trained for years and years to have specialist skills, I enjoy being independent, and I am comfortable with taking on all the roles of a parent which includes both direct caring and providing financially.

When my children were small I returned to work even though I didn't need to, my then husband earned enough money to keep us both. But I wanted to earn my own money. That was important to me.

I do work and I don’t have to. We could afford to live without my earnings.
I work 2 days in a well paid professional job. I find it rewarding, interesting and tiring.
We have one DS who is 9, I would be bored if I didn’t work. 2 days is enough though!

If I had my own money (eg lottery win) I’d happily not work, but I would never be financially dependent on anyone.

I wouldn't, but I'd do some volunteer work to get me out of the house!

I would work in a job that is interesting and stimulating to me, to help keep a sense of who you are outside of mothering. Not any random job just for the sake of it x