Don't want to breastfeed.....

[Zaplolly]

Hi everyone!
I'm 25 weeks and have made the decision not to breastfeed when I have my baby. It's my decision but I feel like I'm being to made guilty by not even trying.... did anyone else just go straight to FF? Did you try in the beginning? Is it wrong to not want to?
It's not that I don't want the connection with my baby, just the following reasons-
-they need feeding much more frequently, which can be exhausting through the night
-it is very draining both mentally and physically for Mum
-it hurts
-I don't feel comfortable breastfeeding in public
-can be trying to do it for potentially hours at a time
-no involvement for Dad/freedom for Mum
-can't measure how much baby is drinking on each feed
Would love to hear everyone's thoughts
Thanks x

Or maybe they're not interested. You fed your child, it's not that big a deal to most people.

Blanche you seem very angry. Wind your neck in a little

Blanche, even if i ff my dcs, i would still maintain breastmilk is the best source of food for babies by a mile.why deny the truth?

I expect I am being politically incorrect but I breast fed mine because I wanted them to have the natural food for human babies, not an artificial breast milk substitute manufactured for profit by multi-national companies.
I didn't feed them processed food either, preferring to know exactly what I put into their bodies until they moved out of my care and started working.
You can do whatever you like with your PFB but I would advise you to read up on the subject so you are well informed. Your OP makes it clear you have not done research on the positives of BF.

Sibling studies eliminate almost all differences between bf/ff babies. They remove confounding variables, like socioeconomic status. Once those are gone bf doesn’t have many (possibly any) long-term effects, including on intelligence and obesity rates.

There are antibodies in breastmilk but once they hit the stomach they’re digested like any other protein (unlike other mammals, human babies get most of their antibodies via the placenta - that’s why you’re told to get the pertussis vaccine when you’re pregnant). However, they can protect the walls of the gastrointestinal tract on the way down. As such, the most important thing bf does (and why it’s so important for mothers in developing countries to bf) is protect the gastrointestinal tract. Babies who are bf are less likely to contract bugs and illnesses like diarrhoea, which can of course be deadly. Breastfeeding is a lifesaver (although the protection is nowhere near 100% - I read a statistic that something like 1 in 26 breastfeeding babies will avoid one gastro illness but I’m not sure of the veracity of that statement). In the West we can basically eliminate these risks through sterilisation of bottles and equipment.

Breastmilk can also protect premature infants from a horrendous disease called necrotising enterocolitis.

Anyone who’s interested should look up sibling studies and the PROBIT study conducted in Belarus, which is a very high quality longitudinal study designed by a famous breastfeeding researcher.

I'm sorry you think that, pornstar. I couldn't be less angry I was just responding to your posts

can anyone provide any real evidence that says that breast feeding definitively makes a lasting, positive impact?

As science moves on, as well as formula, more recent studies have shown there may be no tangible benefit at all. There may be something as minor as it will prevent an ear infection or something, I read some recent studies awhile ago, but it seems more up to date scientific studies have started to disprove the original findings of benefit, that it was hugely exaggerated.

And before anyone asks, just google it youtself. 🤣

As we all know studies are not always accurate or reliable, usually funded by companies who have an agenda, to make profit. My breastmilk is perfect for my baby. I did what was instinctively right for baby and I. It is great to see alot of countries around the world have good breastfeeding rates. Only 0.2 percent of women breastfeed in the uk. that figure is shocking. Do the uk women know something that the rest of the world does not? Stuff your studies where the sun dont shine.

Also some women fight tooth and nail to establish breastfeeding and then comes the likes of you who say that you shouldnt have bothered. That there efforts went in vain as no difference between human milk and dried cows milk.

I always find it sad that people don't give that first breastfeed... a newborn baby will "crawl" to the breast, your body has prepared for this whilst growing your baby and has provided the correct food for that new baby.

I'm combi feeding now after going back to work so I'm not "anti-formula" at all and I totally understand why formula is an actual god send and am thankful for it. However, it is an artificial substitute and I think that first feed/first week or two of feeds are so so important.

But it is your body and your choice. You have only listed perceived downsides to breastfeeding and again I do find it sad that society really does not see breastfeeding as the norm. All of the "problems" you list are not problems at all, most are misinformed or easily resolved. If your mind is made up then don't breastfeed.

However, if you want more information go to a breastfeeding support group.

I'm sure whatever you do will be the right, informed choice for you and your baby and that is the main thing.

Good luck and congratulations!

Pornstar you can shove that percentage back where you pulled it out from.

'They simply dont want to hear my side.'

What's on earth is this 'side'?

Surely it's not about sides.

It's about feeding ones baby however one has chosen to do so.

I've barely ever discussed feeding babies with friends.

It's not actually the most stimulating of conversations

I couldn't even tell you how half of my friends fed their dc as babies.

'My breastmilk is perfect for my baby.'

You've stated this several times

We get you

I'm sure are Correct

However, if you speak like this in RL I'm not surprised you friends give you a wide birth.

Just an observation from a stranger.

Speaking from the OP's possible perspective if I may....

Posts like yours Pornstarlips would possibly put me off even trying to BF.

Over the years I've read some amazing posts from women who BF on here, really objective and supportive, and Op if you are still reading there can be some amazing advice however you decide to move forward.

Unfortunately these kind of threads always seem to get slightly unsavoury, and certainly not in the spirit of women supporting each other at their most vulnerable times.

Such a shame

First of all i am not against ff at all. It is a safe alternative to breastmilk. What i hate is alot of ff mothers try and cancel out bf mothers experiences. Why do i find on mumsnet that alot of mothers who ff are quick to slate bm in a very nasty and bitchy way. Op feed your baby the way you want.

*What i hate is alot of ff mothers try and cancel out bf mothers experiences.
*
Its probably because we don't care how you feed your baby, like you shouldn't care how I feed mine.

Yeah they do. Most likely through guilt and jealousy. Peace out

Pornstarlips no one is jealous of you, seriously. You sound like a really quite odd person. Perhaps one of those that hasn't achieved a huge amount outside of motherhood and so gets a little over passionate about these things. In any case you are coming across as a product of the Trump era whereby we 'don't need science' just aggressive statements of 'fact' with zero evidence to back them up. Some of us prefer to read up and actually educate ourselves on subjects of interest not just bellow at and insult others.

Here here ^^

I always find it sad that people don't give that first breastfeed...

I’m sorry that my feeding choices upset you. Actually, wait, I don’t care.

rainycloudy so you think i haven't achieved much outside motherhood. So what do you think of this? So my mum and dad gave me and my siblings many beatings from around the age of three, i still went to nursery and school with smile on my face and a sense of curiosity.
I looked after my grandparents and fed stray cats and cuddled them even though i came from a family that showed little affection.
My dad called me ugly at the age of 18, just when i started to break away from them, not gonna lie, that gave me very low self esteem for a few years but i picked myself up and when i look in the mirror now i like what i see.
I was the only one in my family to go to university and the day i graduated, my dads face was like he was attending a funeral, but i still didn't let him ruin my day.
Since having children i have had to face some demons, but i have done so with courage and I will never give up on them. Those are just some of my achievements.

🙄

Well on that basis I would certainly think you would be more empathetic than you have come across on this thread. I'm not interested in arguing, we are clearly very different people with different approaches to life and learning. All the best!

I never said once to the op she should breastfeed, if she wanta to ff, thats her decision and she should be happy with it. I was sticking up for my beliefs when there was a whole barage of women saying here that bm is no better then ff. Cant i fight my corner? And you talk about empathy. No one here wants my empathy and why would they? I am just a stranger on the internet. Adios.

Given everything you've just written, it's a shame you couldn't be less dismissive and downright cruel to other women whose life stories you don't know.