MIL fed 12wk old....

[sleepymama15]

My MIL has watched DC2 overnight a couple of times as he’s a terrible sleeper. She watched him last night and said he’d slept great which is unheard of. She then said she had given him custard before bed. She said she knew we wouldn’t be happy about it but did it anyway. AIBU by being thoroughly pissed off?!

I'd never have left my 12 week old baby with anyone

Good for you.

Since when was 4 months 20 weeks?

kittens yep, thanks for the mocking tone there. my daughter was 10 weeks premature and couldn't really tolerate her milk at the best of times due to reflux so in my situation, chocolate buttons were a pretty ridiculous thing to try and give her.

For those of you unable to cope with basic mathematics. We are currently in 2017. 'My children are now early 20s'. Let's say 22. So that advice was around '95..... It doesn't take a huge leap to work out that those of us who were weaning in the 1990s are becoming grandmothers now. Quite possibly completely unaware that doing now, what we were doing then, is now considered not only 'wrong' but by the sound of it tantamount to child abuse ! Despite the fact that our children seemed to benefit from early weaning and had no detrimental side effects.

Im 26 and my red book states that weaning was at 4 months. So I can't by that it was 12 weeks in the 00s

YANBU. That woman wouldn't be able to be around me or my child for a while until I'd calmed down.

Weaning was ok from 12 weeks when mine were little, but it was stuff like baby rice mixed with baby milk or apple sauce. If it was custard, it would be stuff from a Heinz jar that said from 12 weeks. A lot of baby foods were only suitable from 16 weeks.

I can't believe there is this much hysteria over a bit of bloody custard.

I think I'd just be grateful for some help tbh considering most people I know had none. She took a small baby overnight who is known to be a poor sleeper, maybe she was desperate herself. I wouldn't be impressed it was custard, but she was probably intending the right thing

And was it actually baby custard? Not like ambrosia?

My MIL did this we were having a conversation about weaning and I told her my 15 week old child wasn't ready but I'd begin as soon as she was - I stepped out of the room and she gave my child a slurp of hot, cows milk, full caff and sugared tea and smugly told me I needed to feed her real food because she clearly loved it. She told me I was silly for breast feeding as her boys were weaned at 12 weeks. (I nearly took her face off for her but tried to compose myself, whilst figuring out how to handle it my baby copiously vomited all over MIL). Since then she's never been left alone with her. I'm not precious about the guidance (I weaned when baby was sitting up unaided and lost the tongue thrust reflex at 22 weeks) but I really hated that MIL undermined me.
It's rubbish that they're so insistent that their own agenda is best - babies are meant to wake and whatever you decide is what goes, waking is not a problem that needs to be fixed at 12 weeks, you and your partner will need to work as a team (and avoid doing the "I'm the most tired" game as there are no winners in that one) to ensure you both rest when you can so you don't need MiL to give you a break. I'm pleased your partner is annoyed too - at least you're united! At least you know what to expect from your MIL now and know to avoid overnights until you're happy for your child to be fed custard before bed.

It's about the custard but it's not about the custard.

MiL openly said she knew they wouldn't be happy. But she did it anyway.
So she's not to be trusted and she completely disregarded them as parents.

There's no hysteria, just because people have a different opinion to you!

I'd be raging

I think I'd just be grateful for some help tbh considering most people I know had none.

Oh yes OP bow down and thank MIL for putting your baby in danger and disrespecting you

As someone with no local support system I would rather have no break or babysitter then someone who did this.

Eggs in young babies can cause eczema, some tinned baby food also contains egg which should be in HUGE letters on the ingredience

Apart from that she's lost your trust - that's the issue and she knew you wouldn't approve so saying 'it's different advise' now doesn't be apply because she admitted she knew

Oh and it smacks of 'I know your baby better than you, aren't I clever'

Wrrr no

Hahaha it's custard not crack!! I weaned my 19 year old at 6 weeks!! He's absolutely fine. Calm down

I'd never have left my 12 week old baby with anyone

Some people don't have a choice. I certainly don't.

I wouldn't be happy about this but having a night or two off with a 12 week old is amazing, mine is nearly 3 and I've got no one to leave her with so not had a night of good sleep in 3 years. Sorry but if you want to be sure what your baby is eating you keep them with you.

Hahaha it's custard not crack!! I weaned my 19 year old at 6 weeks!! He's absolutely fine. Calm down

Then you were very very very lucky that nothing is wrong with him ( although it's still to soon to tell) this is not something. To be proud of.

by the time all your babies are young adults the guidance will have changed again. You do know that don't you?

Yes. And I'm not ignorant to believe that as science progresses that it right and go against the current advice at the time.

FFS couldn't type over DD head.

Basically I wouldn't be so ignorant to believe that the new guidelines were wrong and I was right.
'Mummy does not know best. Scientists who spend years studying their field know best.

@letmepeeinpeace

6 WEEKS??

That is completely fucking bonkers. I'm amazed your child lived to tell the tale and didnt choke to death.

A very sensible thing my DM said when my DS1 was born was that all her parenting experience was obviously very out of date and she was totally prepared to go by modern guidelines.