Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

they taking her away-please help

141 replies

Nikaleeona · 07/01/2007 23:59

DD is 21 months, was rushed to a specialist hospital 120 miles away from home as it was discovered she had a bleed on the brain. she has totally recovered n is back to normal but child protection n social services are involved and are putting her into foster care 2mora as they say she is at risk living with us. They are also planning on taking out baby away when it is born as they are accusing me n DP of throwing her around n abusing her. All we know is she fell off the sofa n found her on the floor unconcious when i was at wrk n DP looking after her. They have no evisence of us doing anything and we havent done anything to hurt her, we dont even tap her hand or anything. Its ridiclous, im in such a state. She is my world n they taking her away for no reason. Any advice or anyone else been in similar condition?
Many thanks x

OP posts:
MamazonAKAfatty · 08/01/2007 20:28

As i said before i think it best that Nikaleena re posts giving a full and accurate desription of what has happened.

I hate to think that this is a genuine post and the misunderstandings are going to lead to suspican and therefore no assistance.

But i am concerned over these two incidents.
If you have told social services whatyou have told us then theyw ill be thinking that either A) you have known about the abuse and are trying to cover your backs or B) you are too silly to realise what your partner is doing. by continually taking his word over medical opinion youare placing your children in danger.

You really need to decide what is best for your daughter and ask yourself some very painfull questions. the answers may not be the easy option but i can assure you...leaving aman is far better than loseing your children.

TheBlonde · 08/01/2007 20:29

mom - I did wonder about that too

controlfreaky2 · 08/01/2007 20:45

nikaleeona, all the advice on here has been extremely sensible imo.... especially, 1. that you need to give a full / honest account if people are going to understand help you (i mean to doctors / ssd / solicictor in particular) and 2. that you urgently need legal advice FOR YOURSELF (your dp / (cousin?) needs his own separate advice. hth. dont know what more to say really.

fireflyfairy2 · 08/01/2007 21:13

Are you still at the hops Nikaleena?

Have you told them that your cousin is your Dp & the one who was in charge both times your dd got injured?

Saturn74 · 08/01/2007 22:17

How did it go today. Nikaleeona?
I hope you managed to find an experienced solicitor.

HandyTrinkett · 08/01/2007 22:29

No word here from Nikaleeona.

mummylin2495 · 08/01/2007 23:00

no advice to offer but it all sounds decidedly fishy to me,but if it is true the first priority would be to get the child away from her dp/cousin asap

nannynick · 08/01/2007 23:09

If this is genuine, then my advise is to get a good legal team to support Your case.

How has your work and DP's work responded? Do they even know? (it may be in your contracts that you need to notify them if you are accused of child abuse, given your professions).

controlfreaky2 · 08/01/2007 23:13

if ssd start any legal proceedings you will be entitled to non means tested publicly funded legal representation nikkileeona.

louii · 08/01/2007 23:53

Is this thread actually for real?

lornaloo · 09/01/2007 00:07

Can't believe your daughter has been seriously ingured 2 times whilst being under the care of you Dp(cousin) and you still don't think its him. FFS wake up!! He is obviously hurting her! How can you not think its him? IT IS! Your daughter has ended up with black eyes and a bleed on the brain because of him. Your poor poor little girl. You need to do what is best for her before its too late. Get rid of that monster of a boyfriend and get on with your life with your daughter!

HandyTrinkett · 09/01/2007 06:18

Nikaleeona,
the legal advice offer is still there but you need to be talking to someone ASAP.

wannaBeWhateverIWannaBe · 09/01/2007 06:23

sorry but I am very . A child is seriously injured and has been in hospital for three weeks, the doctors are not happy that her injuries are consistent with a fall from a sofa, social services are called and poster is informed that the child will be taken into care and that her unborn baby will be removed at birth. poster sits on this info for three weeks, and instead of finding a solicitor, the night before proceedings she goes for advice on the internet?

Even if ssd had got it wrong, but tbh from info given it doesn't sound as if they have, surely any mother would be fighting tooth and nail to get their child back, not posting on parenting forums where they hadn't really posted before.

wannaBeWhateverIWannaBe · 09/01/2007 06:44

hmmm, I see that poster has posted a few times before but am still .
on the ladder incident thread, it said the cousin was putting up cctv i in the daughter's bedroom - why ever would someone do that? also said that the nurse at carehome where he works checked her and that said all was ok despite having bloodshot eyes? again .

if this is genuine, then I would say someone has abused that child. I have no professional qualifications but even from the ladder falling and cousin taking her to his place of work rather than hospital would have set huge alarm bells ringing for me.

Also as you work in a nursery you are obliged to tell your employers that you are being investigated by child protection services, although tbh, I would imagine that if they know you work with children they would probably be obliged to notify your employers themselves.

tigermoth · 09/01/2007 07:55

Hope you've got legal help, by now Nikaleena. You certainly need it.

(hope the person posting is not her cousin/dp)

snowfunwhenyoureknackered · 09/01/2007 08:02

all sounds very suspect to me

hope social services do get involved, those injuries are very worrying in such a young baby

maybe she should be taken away for her own safety until things are sorted out

Heavenis · 09/01/2007 08:26

I can't understand why you would go on the say so of a nurse at your Dp/cousin work that your dd was ok.
Blood shot eyes from a fall would in my mind mean that the fall had been significant to course excess pressure in the eye.
You must also take responsibility for not taking her to hospital.
If ss suspect your dp then they will take your unborn child away as that child would be at risk unless you decided to be on your own,with no contact with him.

TheBlonde · 09/01/2007 09:03

have a look at this

tiredemma · 09/01/2007 09:15

HMMMM

how odd.

UCM · 09/01/2007 09:18

Gawd knows. She has posted here over the last year or so though. Bit extreme for trolling.

Methinks confused young girl.

lulumama · 09/01/2007 09:21

have read this and the links..i hope if there is a child at risk, something is being done....and it sounds like it is.

TBH, if SS were taking my child, i;d not be on an internet forum, i;d be finding a lawyer.

wurlywurly · 09/01/2007 09:34

whats trolling???

cruisemum1 · 09/01/2007 09:43

I am soo worried about this poor little girl . Nickaleeona - I think your dp/cousin is dangerous. Get rid of him and take care of your little girl. Please

HandyTrinkett · 09/01/2007 09:47

Meetings most of the day so I'm not going to be able to keep checking this thread or my email if she wants to get in touch... ..here's the advice from my wife having only read this thread to lunchtime yesterday..

---------

Right - here goes.

She definitely needs to see a solicitor ASAP on her own with any notes on this matter. She needs to document everything (record all events by date, time, who she spoke with and what was discussed, what's happened etc. as she will need to refer to her notes later if matters are taken further, which I suspect they will).

If there's no court proceeding (which it sounds as if that's the case, at the moment) she may get legal aid subject to her financial position but I'm happy to see her on a free interview. She'll get legal aid regardless of her financial position if there's court proceeding underway.

The injury to the child's head is classified as non-accidental head injury, and bearing in mind the other injuries to the child, SS have a duty to protect the child and her unborn child, and investigate matters. For there to be internal head bleeding, the child would have to be shaken, known as "baby shaking syndrome" and all it takes could be a moments loss of control i.e. one shake.

SS have asked her to give her consent to put her child in "voluntary care" and if she refuse, SS can, and I suspect, will make an application to the court for an Emergency Protection Order (without giving her notice of their application) and at the same time they may also apply for an Interim Care Order. Once that is underway, both she and any of the child's carers will be investigated. She and her partner will have to undergo various risk assessments and possibly other assessments dependant upon nature of case and what else is brought up.

SS should convene An Initial Child Protection Conference, if they haven't already done so, and she will be invited to attend. She can take a friend along or her Solicitor but they generally do not get paid for attending. In any event, whoever attends with her can not speak for her; they are simply there to give moral support and take notes!

The purpose of the conference is for SS to set out, in brief, their case and decide whether the child should be placed on The At Risk Register and what actions need to be taken.

The conference will have all relevant professionals there i.e SS; medical professionals; police; child's school teacher etc.

There's too little info. to be able to advise properly, except that once SS are involved, they won't let go easily and sadly, I suspect her child may be taken away, at the very least on a short term basis until all avenues have been looked at.

If she wants, I can see her and she should contact me. She needs to act QUICK and get LEGAL ADVICE!

EllieHsMum · 09/01/2007 09:51

OMG I hope this little girl is ok