When did you start enjoying your baby?

[mrshope]

Hi - this is my first post and I was just wondering when you starting to enjoy your baby? I am a first time mum to a 9week old and while I love him dearly I am definitely not enjoying myself! It seems so relentless! Is there light at the end of the tunnel?!?

Also (and I will stop posting now!) another glimmer of hope is all the hard work u are going through now to get yr baby to kip may pay off. I have noticed that those with babies who were challenging in early months are now good sleepers. Those that slept well early on have now started causing issues. Could just be who I know but worth a thought?

Ok promise last post I've just read all posts. You are doing just fine my love. I promise you this - it does get easier. It does!!! I was so so down in the early months. I remember leaving my baby to go to a first aid course and just thinking the whole time whats wrong with him. All the other mums took their babies and they either slept or just sat there. Mine would have screamed.
I went home to mum and cried and cried. I have sobbed so hard on the bathroom floor before a hundred times.
It gets better. Some babies are just more hard work than others. It's very annoying though. Others just won't get it. I had one nct friend ask me why I bounced LO so much. I felt like punching her! She just didn't get that if I didn't jig him about he's scream. Hers would just lie there or sleep. Sigh.
It will make you a much more empathetic person I think. And if u can get through this (which u will) you can get through anything!! Xxxx

Sound advice there from Another. Ooh I remember desperately wanting to snap at every single person (my mum, my dad, my in laws, my sister, my sisters in law, baby friends, non baby friends, random blimmin postman) who tried to work out why my baby was crying in the pushchair. No, she's not too cold, hot, hungry, thirsty etc etc, she just does not like being laid/sat there. I STILL get this now as she's still not a big fan! It is infuriating when people quiz you or 'try to help'!

Oh man I just lost my whole post (although a lot of it was possibly drivel)
Will try again later

Mini pie so sorry I only saw your message now. Will pm you. Thanks for being so kind!

Just saw an idiot of a paed doctor. Not only did he make me sob - he also suggested I should give DS (who is 13 weeks...) cooled boiled water in the night to stop him waking.
Am I am idiot to think that is not a good suggestion?!?

I can't actually believe the paed suggested that. Why would water fill him up more than milk?! You shouldn't give anything at all other than breast milk if you're breastfeeding for first six months

Apparently he is waking out of habit in the night - he doesn't need to eat so I should give him cooled boiled water to make him think he is full and pop him back to bed...
Not entirely sure why that would stop him waking!!
Glad I'm not the only one who thinks that sounds like a bad idea!

Eh? How's that easier than just feeding him?? He might be hungry anyway. Hmm sounds very odd advice to me

Good lord. What an out of date and dodgy suggestion.

It's true his wakings probably are mostly due to habit or discomfort not hunger (though 2 feeds a night would still be totally normal for EBF). But giving him water isn't going to fix a habit and it's certainly not going to fix discomfort. And the last thing you want is to trick him into thinking he's full and end up with him not taking enough milk as a result.

Did you talk to the paed about reflux at all ...?

The paed was horrible and I ended up in floods of tears! We went about the potential silent reflux but I think from what he said (although hard to know what he was getting at) he doesn't think DS has silent reflux.
Which is fine - I just want to rule things out really.

Between 7pm and 7am I feed DS twice - which doesn't seen too bad to me...
Our main issue is that he also wakes at 5/5.30 (no matter when he was last fed)
He won't be comforted and then put back in his basket so I end up with him on my chest - similar to how I think BB described in order for him to get some sleep
So he is never asleep for much more than 3 hrs
The (horrid) paed said that because he was now over 6kgs he should be sleeping for at least 5hrs in a row

Even 5 hours would mean 2 feeds between 7 and 7 anyway. The point is, it's not the feeds that are your issue, it's all the other wakings. Sounds like he didn't really listen and just leapt to conclusions. Unimpressive.

The 5am thing is very familiar. DD always slept worse and worse as the night wore on - I think because by then she was no longer tired enough to sleep through the discomfort (which in her case was caused by wind due to tongue tie, and probably she had an extra sensitive gut anyway due to being prem). But I think any sort of discomfort would have the same effect.

Hmm... Is it worth getting the tongue tie checked again to see if it's grown back? (The dr who snipped DD's will check for free - maybe whoever did yours would do the same?)

Minipie - yep I think I should get his tongue tie checked. He is soooo windy and that seems to be the issue at 5 - he is uncomfortable and farts and each time it wakes him :-(

Cheesecakemom - I think I am struggling with lack of sleep and a very high needs baby.
He refused to be put down for the first 3 weeks of his life and is a rubbish sleeper. And an excellent screamer!
I guess I just thought I would be better and that I would enjoy it more!

Im due in April and new to all this so I do worry when people say its all fantastic. I think like everything in life it has its fantastic parts and not so good parts so it is nice to hear all is not rosy all the time. Im trying to be realistic. I can't wait for the good bits! excited x

Pipapp- I was woefully underprepared for how un-rosy it actually was.
But they are right. It does get better. Faster for some people than others.
Good luck x

I think it's probably best to expect the first few months to be really tough - that way if you luck out and get a straightforward baby it will be a pleasant surprise, but if it is tough you won't be shocked... Pessimists are never disappointed and all that

Doesn't mean you can't be excited - just expect tough along with the exciting iyswim!

mrshope how are you doing?

15 months for me both times. It's when personality really comes out and sleeping seems to settle down. I currently also have a 1 week old who is gorgeous and snuggly and perfect but my god I find it relentless.

YesRosey -do be excited - hope my post wasn't too negative - it wasn't meant to be!
Some people do seem to breeze through it.
I think I had a tough time and blamed myself for a lot of the issues we have had/ are having.
But the time flies and I have a 3 and a half month old!

Update on DS - having seemingly been getting worse and worse especially with regards to sleeping - I tweaked his routine to stretch his feeds to 3/3.5 hrs and he now seems to have stopped waking every 2 hrs as frequently. Sometimes I get two nearly 4 hr stretches in the night!! It's amazing. Sadly he still wakes at 5/5.30 and will only settle on me :-(
He still only naps for 40mind unless in the sling or cuddled but I am persevering and he is getting better at falling asleep in the basket...
But it is baby steps!
Thanks for all the support!
Xxx