Active discussions

Best Amazon Prime Day deals: Mumsnet favourites

Best Amazon Prime Day deals:
Mumsnet favourites

Shop now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Original poster

When did you start enjoying your baby?

194 replies

mrshope · 12/09/2014 16:59

Hi - this is my first post and I was just wondering when you starting to enjoy your baby? I am a first time mum to a 9week old and while I love him dearly I am definitely not enjoying myself! It seems so relentless! Is there light at the end of the tunnel?!?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Set a reminder
Original poster
mrshope · 24/09/2014 17:16

Hi BB,
We are surviving! Will be picking up ranatidine tomorrow...
Has anyone had any experience with LOs waking between 5/5.30 every morning and screaming?
DS used to grunt and shuffle around at this time but I learnt that he was actually still asleep but now he wakes up screaming. You can practically set your watch by him. I can normally calm him down but can never get him back in his basket and end up holding him until 7 Hmm
He sounds in such pain when he wakes. When he wakes at other times in the night he doesn't normally behave like this!

OP posts:
BB01 · 24/09/2014 17:27

Hmm our DD does often stir around five and is often quite screamy at first, think cos she wants to get up, maybe realised it's morning. But guess that's different cos she's much older. Not sure what else it could be..will have a think! Glad you're surviving and hope the ranitidine n helps when you get it x

LittleRedRobin10 · 27/09/2014 15:58

How are you getting on, mrshope? X

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Families General parenting
Noggie · 27/09/2014 16:18

Depends so much on your baby- dd1 was harder than dd2 . It's just do hard to enjoy yourself when you are shattered! I def found about 7 weeks- 6 months the most relentless. Hang on in there! Hope you feel ok x

Original poster
mrshope · 27/09/2014 18:50

Hi littleredrobin
We had a really nice week! Apart from the waking at 5am and resettling. Which is killing me!
Totally exhausted.
But I did feel like I was enjoying him more.
And then we had a massive melt down before bath time and I feel like we have gone backwards again.
One step forwards and two backwards!!

He hits the magical 12 weeks on tues.....
It will get better - repeat x 100

Happy Saturday x

OP posts:
Original poster
mrshope · 27/09/2014 18:51

Noggie - I think you are right. So hard to enjoy anything when you are this tired!!!

OP posts:
BB01 · 27/09/2014 19:56

Sounds like a positive week! Aw we still have stressful days here too but they do become less frequent as they get older, I promise!

Original poster
mrshope · 29/09/2014 10:11

:-( half an hr of screaming before morning nap today for unexplained reason :-(
And on the day we have to meet up with nct class.
12 weeks tomorrow and showing no signs of improving.
Gahhhh

OP posts:
Kewrious · 29/09/2014 12:11

If you had a lovely week don't beat yourself up about a meltdown. Can you keep a diary? Not a feeding/sleeping one but a general one about how your day went and how you are doing. Then looking back that might remind you of how far you've come rather than a bad couple of days getting you down and thinking you've made no progress at all.

Kewrious · 29/09/2014 12:15

Oh DS would wake every day at 5 am to poo. Straining and grunting. I would stroke his back and sing, (I kid you not), 'your poo will come. It will come. Poo will come. Mummy says poo will come.' And when it came I would say, 'see trust your Mummy!' Then he would be cleaned up, have a big feed and go back to sleep in our bed till 7:30 or so. Don't stress if he wants to sleep on you then. Many kids do, even when they are older. Tackle a few things at a time, and you can tackle this later.

Original poster
mrshope · 29/09/2014 13:04

Kewrious,
That is agood idea! I think I have a habit of dwelling on the negative.
The 5.30 thing is so strange. I can practically set my watch no matter when he was last fed- he wakes at 5.30!!

OP posts:
BB01 · 29/09/2014 15:10

Aww you're not alone, my little girl still fights with screaming sometimes. I honestly think some people do underplay how difficult their babies are. Some of my friends say their babies are terrific sleepers then I find out they often wake for hours overnight crying!

Original poster
mrshope · 29/09/2014 16:10

Thanks BB, just back from official nct meet up. Think my. DS is the only baby who isn't doing 5/6 hr stretches at night. Hmm Depressing.
How do people just put their babies down and they go to sleep?!?
I am so jealous xxx

OP posts:
Kewrious · 29/09/2014 21:44

Eih people lie. Especially about sleep. I realised that 5/6 hour stretches meant that they had to resettle multiple times but no feeds. Friend said the other day her DS sleeps all night. Same age as toddler DS who is 2.8. Turns out her definition is 'runs riot til 9:30 then collapses, comes into his parental bed multiple times etc. But he sleeps through the night apparently.

BB01 · 30/09/2014 11:58

Mrshope your NCT friends are either remarkably, unusually lucky or are lying! That is a lot time for a baby that age to sleep. Young babies are not programmed to sleep for long periods and actually frequent waking helps prevent cot death. I know that doesn't help if you feel like the walking dead from lack of sleep but honestly, it is completely normal! Plus their babies may well regress and end up sleeping worse than yours in the coming months. Things can change so fast!

Original poster
mrshope · 30/09/2014 16:52

Gosh I hope they are exaggerating...
DS turned the magic 12 weeks today!
Not so magical.
Last night was unbearable. I ended up giving him to my husband (who is in our bedroom upstairs) at 6am as I couldn't stop crying.
He woke up from 7 at 9,10.30,1.30(back down at 3.30),4.30 and then every 20mins until I gave in at 6am :-(

OP posts:
BB01 · 30/09/2014 19:14

Ah you must be knackered, you poor thing :-(

Original poster
mrshope · 30/09/2014 22:56

That is quite bad isn't it?! I'm not just being a wimp?!

OP posts:
BB01 · 02/10/2014 19:49

It sounds like what DD was like but then she was an exceptionally bad sleeper!

Original poster
mrshope · 03/10/2014 01:47

Oh dear... I feared as such...

OP posts:
Original poster
mrshope · 03/10/2014 01:49

Is there anyway to improve it?!?
Think tonight will be even worse - he didn't even make it to 10.30

OP posts:
minipie · 03/10/2014 11:09

oh gawd, that sounds familiar, poor you.

I can only suggest co sleeping until he is a bit older and you are more sure about the reflux/tongue tie situation. Have you tried co sleeping and does it help?

once he's bigger and you're sure he's feeding well and not in any pain then you could try some form of sleep training but 12 weeks is too early esp if you're not sure about reflux etc.

I never thought I'd co sleep but in the end I slept semi propped up while dd slept on my chest, until she was about 3 months ...because otherwise she woke as you describe ... then we had a few weeks of her in basket/cot but waking loads of times a night... then at 17 weeks I cracked and did CC and it worked amazingly. (But, I had had the tongue tie snipped at 15 weeks, so was pretty sure she had no wind/feeding issues by that point).

How is he in the daytime? Naps wise and mood wise?

By the way - you live very near me - I'm around this afternoon (with toddler in tow) and am happy to meet/visit and swap tales of sleep misery if that would help at all. Crying (his or yours Wink) will be totally understood. no worries if you don't fancy it though especially given the nights you've had!

anotherbitofcake · 03/10/2014 18:52

From around 4.5 months. Before that I wanted to walk out the door and not come back!

But ds had various issues like tt, thrush, in hospital with infection, colic and on and on! So no wonder poor little thing was wailing 24/7

I honestly love it now (9 mo) and it seems to be getting better too. We are both growing in confidence and he is just so much fun.

That said I am looking forward to going back to work pt as being a mother is really really hard no matter how much you enjoy it. If I had a nanny in a cupboard I could pull out when I wanted a quiet hour or so if be a happy lady!

anotherbitofcake · 03/10/2014 18:53

I also think you need at least 6 mo to adjust if it's your first. It's such a massive change in who you are. I struggled with that a lot and mourned for the old me and my old life (still do a bit but mourn is probably too strong a word now)

anotherbitofcake · 03/10/2014 18:59

Ah just quickly read your last posts. Have you checked all health things like reflux, colic, tongue tie?
If you think baby just like that YOU ARE NOT ALONE and it will get better. It's all phases. Your nct buddies will have difficult phases in other areas. You will home in on the things you are obsessing over and compare to them. I did! I got really down about it but it does pass promise!
That said do double check the stuff like silent reflux etc