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Fantastic 40+ Mums

999 replies

Hpbp · 10/10/2012 19:57

Mum of 2, DS1 nearly 4yo and DD2 almost 11 weeks. I hope to find here advices from experienced mums so that I can avoid mistakes... I made some with DS1 and my life sometimes is hell, it is hard to unlearn wrong behaviour, so hard.
At the time being, DD2 is a very sweet baby, she is easy to decipher, cries are always related to some kind of discomfort and I managed to learn what they mean, or almost. Only one issue with her ATM is that she rejects bottle feeding even with expressed milk. I'd like to be able to escape a bit from the house to get a haircut or a facial. And I am sure DH would like to feed her sometimes too.
I struggle a bit more with DS1, who is usually a good boy, energetic, happy and loving. But after school, getting him to take his bath is a battle and falling and staying asleep all night are big issues. The problems did exist before but now with the recent arrival of his sister, the intensity has increased. Or maybe they are the same but to me they seem bigger and need to be addressed quickly so that I can look after both without raising my voice.
All advice are welcome. I need help here.

Also I'd like to invite all the graduates from the Fantastic 40+ Mums to be thread to join. You have been truly fantastic and so supportive during my pg. I hope to be able to keep on sharing with you this wonderful parenting adventure.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
blueblackdye · 20/12/2012 11:21

Midget, feeding every 2 hours ? How about night time ? This is so hard on you. I already forgot that... Memory not as good, is it age or baby brain !? Who knows? A little smile and all is forgotten, tiredness, bad mood etc, these little monkeys have this super power on their mums and they are well aware of it.

LRM, Anastasia is on an average of 4 feeds a day 8.30am 11.30,15 and 18.30 roughly, sometimes I also feed her at night, is she really hungry then ? I am not sure but I know that she falls back asleep straight away. It is an easy solution but I might also give her bad habits by feeding at night. The night feed can be at anytime between midnight and 6.30am. ATM with her runny nose, I tend to offer boobs more often but she would not take anything if she is not hungry.
If Dylan does not stay still during feed, have you tried burping him in the middle of feed ? Or let him empty his bowels before offering breast again ? Anastasia can feed for 5 minutes or 40 minutes, there is no rule on feed length for her. But her weight is good, her nappies very wet so I am not too concerned.

Hope Knotty is preparing her bag to get home with little baby girl.

Goat, treat yourself, you have plenty of time to go on diet in a few months, besides, we all will be running after these babies soon, and weight loss will happen before we know it !

My nose is better today but the coughing is still bad. DH and DS just left for the XMas tree at DH's work. Anastasia and I were invited too but the pouring rain, the cold and Bond Street at XMas time put me off. I'd rather stay home again today.

Seaside, VQ hope you are well

eagleray · 20/12/2012 16:58

Knotty has already popped into t'other thread with good news and a photo!

littleredmonkey · 20/12/2012 17:30

Baby knotty is here. Little Rosa. See knotty profile for picture. Xx

Interested in this thread?

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scarecrow22 · 20/12/2012 21:59

Hello ladies. Couldn't resist a quick visit from the pg thread... See I'm not the only one of us to take a peek!
Am now a bit scared about LO arriving. I'd forgotten what hard work it can be.. Though envious you get to hold LOs....

littleredmonkey · 21/12/2012 07:59

Scarecrow. You cant hide we know where u r! !' hahAha. Dont be scared you will be fab. When r u due! Done your birth plan yet!?

littleredmonkey · 21/12/2012 08:02

How is everyone feeling today?

littleredmonkey · 21/12/2012 11:46

Baby monkey teeth are coming. Sucking hand like mad till it is red. Sleeve covered in droll. Cranky more then usual. I can feel tiny bumps on his bottom row. Made me cry I want him to stay little a bit longer. Silly mummy. Any tips besides teething ring. He can't have gel as not three months. Are babies cranky all the time with it or in bits? Do they all start one after the other ie will I have a miserable baby for months? Poor baby monkey getting his first pegs. Thats what my mum called them with me

blueblackdye · 21/12/2012 11:48

Scarecrow, you will be joining us befre you know it ! And you will see that we have not changed a bit: I am getting the same support as the one I had during pg !
LRM, my nose is less runny but I am still coughing, Anastasia is OK, like Master Midge, she only had a mild version of my cold, thanks God ! She slept from 7pm to 4am, then from 4.30am to 8.30am so I am notcomplaining at all. Will try to go on a shopping spree at Westfield White city this afternoon.
Has anyone bought nursing tops ? A JojoMamanBebe store has opened on the highstreet, and they have some, just wondering if it is worth investing in one or two...

blueblackdye · 21/12/2012 12:06

Oh little teeth ! That is exciting ! DS had his first when he was 1 yo, I don't recall he has been disturbed at all. Keep us posted.

littleredmonkey · 21/12/2012 15:17

Boobs and little teeth. God help me! !!!!!
Glad Anastasia is feeling better.
7-4 that. Is dream sleep stuff. Baby monkeys max is 4,5 hours. It really was Michael flatley in his basket last night I could hear river dance music in my head has he baskets in ewans red glow

Midgetm · 21/12/2012 19:14

Evening all. Just finished DD's Christmas party. Don't know what I was thinking. I am knackered. Everyone left now house is carnage.

teeth? Blimey. That is early. Don't be sad LRM he is just an early developer.

I have had some nursing tops and I think one of them is why I got mastitis as it compressed my nipples too much so I am not a big fan. I also worry that I will forget to put a boob away in them and make a tit of myself quite literally as easy to forget when you have your boobs out!

Welcome to the world little Rosa.

bytheseaside · 21/12/2012 21:58

hello ladies! been away on a sleep-deprivation extravaganza, followed by a surprise drunk-on-unheard-of-amounts-of-sleep couple of days (although nothing to compete with bbd) - don't know whether i'm coming or going.

knotty hurrah! tell us all about it when you are ready. [waves to eagleray and scaecrow]

midget liked the 'tit of yourself' pun Grin yes, that would be mortifying ... I've nearly done it loads of times, its only a matter of time ...

bbd I just bought one in mothercare sale, but tbh think they are often more revealing than 2 normal tops, one up one down, which is what i normally do when out and about. something faintly pornographic about them too - in a frumpy way - or is that just me?

goat really?? - you dont like christmas dinner?? its my favourite food, followed closely by custard, especially in trifle form mmmmm. been told by hv i cant eat sprouts as it will make baby's colic worse, and i love sprouts. when she said no chocolate either i nearly wept ... i think its silent reflux not colic tho, so may decide to go with the sprouts.

lrm teeth already - can that happen? yikes! we often have 2 hourly, or hourly,feeds - although it can be 4 hours - only in the day, though! I think if im right about the reflux, the feeding will be comfort feeding often, using the milk to soothe the sore oesophagus, poor thing. we're trying gaviscon and osteopathy

vq hope little j still on the mend - poor poppet. you doing ok?

have made and sent xmas cards (hurray), bought most presents, but tree not up and no christmas-away outfits identified, still not unpacked clothes, so looks like its maternity leggings and tshirt as usual on xmas day. maybe i should buy something, but i just spent all our money in jojo online sale

Midgetm · 21/12/2012 22:03

seasisde Grin at the porno reference - they are like peep hole tops and a bit Hmm

blueblackdye · 21/12/2012 23:09

All right Ladies, got it, it is no use investing in nursing tops. Thank you, I quite liked the Breton stripe long sleeve TShirt in red, just thought it would be nice to have a not too expensive "outfit" fr xmas.... Seaside, I will be wearing the same stuff as you for Xmas, leggings and TShirt with pukes ! Midget, as usual, just love the way you say things, peep holes, hey ? Xmas Shock

What is silent reflux ? Sounds horrible. Hope osteopathy and gaviscon will help quickly, poor little baby Seaside.

Visit to westfield was very good, I did not spend one penny for myself ! How surprising ! Bought a xmas jumper for DS. And DH offered himself a new suit. But he also offered me lunch at the Brasilian Cabana, skewers were very good but side dishes were a joke, rice was not cooked and the portion of stir fried greens was as big as a thimble !

Off to bed. Have invited friends for a brunch tomorrow ! Midget, my house will be a carnage too.

Midgetm · 22/12/2012 08:18

Well 2 nights in a row midge woke only once from 111pm till 7. This is progress. However a neighbour has gone away and left his house alarm going off every 2 hours so I have slept bugger all. The noise people are breaking in to turn it off today. Angry. I was on the phone to our local noise patrol at 2am. Hmm

Right final preparations and then off to see seussical the musical in town. Good luck with your catering HP

littleredmonkey · 22/12/2012 08:53

Midget. Baby monkey was the same the last week. We have found bed at 8 wake at 10:30. He sleeps till 3 then till 6ish so lovely to get 9 hours sleep for me. Bythesea. Glad u have had sleep especially drunk on it.
Midget you are very good doing a party feel sorry for you having to clean up. We had an alarm issue once before with a neighbour pain in the arse especially with baby and lack of sleep. I have un unplugged our phone got sick of it ringing in the day for ppi shit. Dp dad hates it I have unplugged it tough shite text me or mobile on silent baby needs to sleep

knottyhair · 22/12/2012 10:11

Just popping on to say hi! Had a quick scan and so sorry that a lot of you have horrible colds & other stuff to deal with - hope all get better soon. Well, Rosa arrived at 10.32am on Monday 17th, via ELCS to the dulcet tones of Shaky's Merry Christmas Everyone on the radio Hmm. She is gorgeous of course Wink, and the 3 of us are totally besotted with her. I came home on Weds lunchtime which was lovely, but had a bloody miserable time trying to BF in hospital (as with DS), so bad mother that I am, she has gone on to formula already but I feel so much happier. To those of you struggling with BF, I salute you all. Dare I say it, but she's in a sort of routine already (of her own doing), and currently sleeps really well (6.30ish til 10.30ish in the evening, then a feed, then sleeps until 2.30ish, another feed, and tends to wake between 6 & 7am until cold/teething/other factor mucks it up! She has a little jaundice on her face, and MW is coming to do heel prick test today and check my wound. Really hope all those with colds feel better soon, and lots of kisses on soft cheeks to your LOs xx

Goatbongohohoandjinglejingle · 22/12/2012 15:05

Hello knotty many, many congratulations on the birth of Rosa! Lovely to know you are home and enjoying her.
bbd what magic are you working on Anastasia that she feeds so efficiently? We are on formula but still waiting for that magic sleep-through-the-night that is supposed to be the payoff. Though the last two nights he has done 7-1 so I live in much hope! midget you are a wonder doing every two hours plus having an older one. Glad you enjoyed the nativity, we have that to look forward to! lrm ouch with the early teething we have the same (three months adjusted) I feel so sorry for BG not being able to shove things in his mouth to chew yet. Not long though I think as the last couple of days he has been looking at things in his hand. One suggestion was a wet facecloth stuck inthe freezer for a bit, am going to try it.
seaside hooray for being drunk on sleep, what miracle occurred?
I promise everyone that there will be roast veg on mutable on Christmas Day, plus pudding and mince pies for those strange people who want them. Otherwise there will be one of my famous pies and for aftershave boozy chocolate bombes from bbc good food website. My lovely inlaws wanted to cook to give me a break but cooking is my hobby so the break will be me planting them on the sofa with bg while I have fun in kitchen.
BG will be having milk with a side order of milk.

Goatbongohohoandjinglejingle · 22/12/2012 15:09

Mutable? Aftershave?? My phone is obviously already on the boozy puddings.
Mutable = my table
Aftershave = afterwards

bytheseaside · 22/12/2012 15:32

knotty congratulations! wow - a routine!! am envious and impressed :) mind you i never had routine in my life before all this baby malarkey, so it was never likely to happen for us.

goat i think osteopath was the difference - i love her! it wasnt a fluke - 3 nights in a row have been better now, plus less fretful evenings. i long to do some cooking. no chance at all with velcro baby - your puddings sound amazing.

midget thats awful! happened where i used to live - we were awake all night until a neighbour took a hammer to the alarm and everyone cheered!

BadMissM · 23/12/2012 19:20

Glad to hear you all seem to be doing brilliantly with LOs....! Happy Christmas everyone....Xmas Smile

Goatbongohohoandjinglejingle · 24/12/2012 00:36

Sorry everyone, I need a little rant...
Went to DH's aunt's Christmas party yesterday. She does it for the whole family, loads of people turn up. A great bunch of people, really fun. And of course they were all besotted with BG (who wouldn't be Xmas Smile ) someone said something about BG being born, and in front of everyone FIL said 'he wasn't born, he was carved out."
I was Xmas Shock to say the least, that he could even think this in light of how traumatic it all was. Poor DH was utterly mortified so I tried to brush it off, but it was a bit of a punch. I know this isn't very bad in comparison to much that people put up with...
It was also after he had spent ages correcting me every time I gav bg's age as five months, saying no, he is three months old, his age has nothing to do with how long he has been on the planet. Xmas Hmm
Still it was lovely to see people I only see once a year!
Rant over.

Midgetm · 24/12/2012 08:11

Goat - that is just bloody rude. Baby goat was born, it makes not a jot of difference what exit he came out of. Rudeness Hmm

littleredmonkey · 24/12/2012 09:58

Ladies and special babIes
Wishing you all a very merry 1st Christmas with your special little ones and happy teething weening and more sleep 2013.

Merry christmas to a very special group if ladies xxxx

littleredmonkey · 24/12/2012 09:59

Specially for goat and may all your in laws not be insensitive