How much do you 'ignore' your children?

[Gameboy]

Have just been out with two families - friends of ours- who have kids about the same age, and I have to confess, I am amzed by the extent to which they actively 'ignore' their children trhoughout the whole afternoon.

By this I mean they seem to 'zone out' from all the various requests/ questions/ constant 'to-ing and fro-ing' that seems typical of under- 6s??

As a result they actively seem to enjoy themselves more, manage to have 'adult' conversations (which I gave up years ago )and it seems that their kids eventually give up and go and sort out themselves whatever it is they want....( which seems like a good thing I suppose)

I can't decide whether I'm just a mug with my kids and let them dominate my life too much... but I simply CAN'T ignore them - it seems really rude and uncaring somehow??

OK - I've been trying hard not to say it but...

I feel incredibly sad for a little boy who prefers the company of adults to his peers

He's facing a life of not fitting in and being an oddity and thats so sad.

Whilst I am sure that your friends have got a lot of fun out of your little boy Vaunda I don't think you and they have done him any favours in the long run!

Snap Tarantula - I spent so long hovering over the post button that we cross posted

PMSL Aloha we ahad that at a works doo. 2 people brought kids cos it was at a bowling alley and they took over boht the alleys. Then they objected to the language (we were up at the bar FFS). Twas a bad evening that one

Hey moo ... good to 'see' you!
Yep ... went to deepest darkest devon when I was in the UK and met my fab mate Jimjams in the flesh ...
Yep, ignored her kids and drank vats of wine ...

thanks SB so glad someone agrees with me been hoovering too

For a bit. DS1 fell in love with her and spent a lot of time sitting on her lap (and climbing into her bed).Her dad was worried about her visiting in case I was a brothel keeper.

cross posted- it would take some doing to ignore ds1

Jimjams at brothel keeper

Brothel keeper, eh? So glad to see someone with the imagination to see further than the hairy handed lorry driver ?

Ignoring kids and drinking vats of wine? Works for me...

I knew someone once (an ex) who only mixed with adults until he went to school. At 28 he said to me "i only feel comfortable around adults" (he meant people older than him) I asked when he would count himself as an adult. He was very uncomfortable around his peer group (and admitted it).

He was, wasn't he ...
He was so worried that I was going to stay with someone I had met on the internet ... I had to phone him the minute I got there to tell him she was normal and wasn't going to sell me to the white slave trade ... PMSL
I love your kids Jimjams ... and who could ignore DS1 with those deep brown eyes that you could drown in???
I was also very happy to have 24 hours away from mine!

ha ha- but childless may have been - well - relaxing!

OK, not I've been here a little while, but what does AFAICS mean? My ds got loads of referals for not getting on with his peers - the SENCO (mad woman) told us he was autistic! I am very glad that he now mostly prefers playing with his friends to talking with adults. I'm still glad he's great with adults, don't get me wrong, but for the next ten years or so, it's his class mates that he needs to get along with.

oops - Meant "now" not "not"

It mean As far as I can see

Actually think I might have made it up but couldnt be bothered to type it lol maybe I should have would hav ebeen quicker wouldnt it

Yes, the big brown eyes are rather special I didn't post on your "child abduction" thread, jimjams, as I couldn't think of anything to add but your ds1 is an exceptionally beautiful child.

I'm sure I've seen it before - just wondered, as people are actually around - usually I'm posting way after everyone has disappeared

AFAIAC - as far as I am concerned
AFAIK - as far as I know

Not when he's weeing on the floor and flushing belongings down the toilet- then he is a git.

The eyes- it's the auti look. They all have it.

Nooka, when did it change and he start to get on better with his peers. Ds is great one on one and has a really close friend he absolutely loves, but isn't really great with his peers. I wish he was.

Gradually through year one. He's still better with just one playmate, but seems less lost in the playground now. I think he was just a bit late maturing on that front really, but the social and communication advisor gave his last teacher lots of tips for class work which probably helped too. I think that he is an introvert at heart (like me really) and will always prefer small groups. Also getting glasses helped enormously. The SENCO thought he wasn't reacting to other children's visual signals - turned out he couldn't see them!

sorry nooka meant also to say that dss is not great at getting on with his peer group either He prefers younger chindren or adults too as he is ADHD and his social skills are quite poor in some ways. Must admit its a blessing a family gahtering tho as all his cousins are younger than him

In family gatherings ds likes older cousins (preferably teenagers) or babies. He's not so keen on the one his age, although this may be because she prefers dd and he gets jealous.

Yep, I can see that jimjams

OK - to me, who doesn't have to deal with the weeing and the flushing - he's 'just' a very beautiful child (mind you, ds2 looks like an angel and is actually a demon from a hell dimension).

It's the angelic ones you have to look out for!