How much do you 'ignore' your children?

[Gameboy]

Have just been out with two families - friends of ours- who have kids about the same age, and I have to confess, I am amzed by the extent to which they actively 'ignore' their children trhoughout the whole afternoon.

By this I mean they seem to 'zone out' from all the various requests/ questions/ constant 'to-ing and fro-ing' that seems typical of under- 6s??

As a result they actively seem to enjoy themselves more, manage to have 'adult' conversations (which I gave up years ago )and it seems that their kids eventually give up and go and sort out themselves whatever it is they want....( which seems like a good thing I suppose)

I can't decide whether I'm just a mug with my kids and let them dominate my life too much... but I simply CAN'T ignore them - it seems really rude and uncaring somehow??

news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/sci/tech/371698.stm

I think that unless you are the sort of person who writes down all of your child's milestones then you are unlikely to remember exactly when things happened. Also I think that one person's definition of talking/walking etc is quite often different from anothers - (ie is it the first word/step, or the first sentence - is it the one that mum hears, or the one that other people can understand etc). The reason why I say this is that when ds was assessed by the paediatrician dh and I could not agree on much of this.

The other thing of course is that early aquisition of skills is no predictor of future success. So to some extent it doesn't really matter.

Of course I could be saying this just because as the youngest of four my mother could never remember which of us did anything when (and not even the day or the time I was born!)

Caligula - empress of blandings is ... a pig from a book, right? pG wodehouse? yes? or something or someone totally different?! Anyway, some people have brilliant online names, i'd like to change mine but don't know how to do it. Doh..i am a silly pig.

Well one person I have ignored for 2 hours whilst I read this thread is dh

Getting back to the original Q, I do ignore my boys a fair bit. Tbh I'm not into playing with them as much as my sis and some friends and I do feel guilty about it. But they're v happy and DS1 is extremely bright. In fact he would get on with your boy Vaunda though he's slightly older (8 in oct) He does play well with lots of other kids but can be found sitting with old people at parties talking about the good old days No joke! He loves the granparents. DS2 is totally different, bit of a tearaway and on Sunday instead of sitting talking to gran (she's 82)decided to lift her skirt right up as she was leaving So word of warning Vaunda, if you hopefully concieve DS2/DD1 or multiple? you may be in for a major shock

Right, going to wake dh now as he's snoring on the sofa bless him.

Ulysees,
In a way I hope i am in for a shock.... Circumstances made ds they way he is but now i am happily married with no stresses things CAN be different. I will still be honest though difference is I will have DH to share the load with childcare etc

Yes Vaunda, I agree with being honest too. DS1 asked me what a gay was yesterday and I said "what do you think?" he said a sissy (but didn't know what sissy means) so I tentatively explained the real meaning of gay and said it's not nice to call kids sissy or make fun of gay people and he agreed. But I told him to just ignore people who did rather than getting into a row as kids will be kids. Whether he takes any notice or not is up to him but he usually thinks of others feelings.

ulyses,
we went down that track a while back. ds is quite happy knowing what homosexual means. and took it upon himself to tell his father, dad and me that he had figured out that if a man and a woman have sex the way they do then obviously 2 men...... and went into detail. My poor Dh and the dreaded ex went beetroot, me i simply said well done now lets continue this conversation at home eh?
lol

lilsis,how old was he at the time? DS1 is 7.

Ulysees, It was about a year ago he was told. He had asked why 2 men were holding hands or something similar. but he didn't say anything else until 2 weeks ago. he too is 7

Hi all
well i thought i would let you all know at this very moment I am being deafened by 2 7 yr olds. One is my DS the other is a little boy who lives downstairs..... they have wrecked the flat with hot wheels and are now deafening me with the playstation arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh..........
anyone got a spare room?????????

Vaunda

Haven't got a spare room but the top bunk bed is available as DS1 and 2 sleep in bottom bunk, no shifting DS1

Ulysees,
it is the first time he has had anyone here to play and now he has invited him to stay tomorrow night arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh lol what do ya do with 2 boys at a sleep over?

Ignore them

Hope it goes well for you and if all else fails there's always wine (for you)

ulysees,
i could give them the wine lol they would definatly sleep then lololol

How did your night go lilsis?

Ulysees,
he didn't stay as ds was not well. But he is meant to stay this evening instead. I had a night out last night without DS or DH was lovely lol. Left them 2 indoors. helped drink 6 jugs of Sex on The Beach hmmm yum yum

never tried sex on the beach (well drink anyway)

glad you had a good night

Ulysees,
It was a great night. I was out with the staff from ds's school. Mum n i just worked out it was more than 6 jugs as some of them were 2 jugs in one jug (if that make sense). No wonder i am so tired today lol.

I've tried sex on the beach because I spent my teenage living right next to the beach.
The sand chafes a bit though eh?

I thought this frightful thread had been buried!
Whos Dares Go there????

lilsis, I'd have the mother of all hangovers after that, can't take the pace now lol.

spidemama,yes but worth it

Ulysees,
I am lucky enough not to suffer with hangovers.... i just end up knackered the next day.

glad for you though

I ignore mine sometimes too well sometimes a lot if they are trying to bug me especially if they want something they know they cant have.

my eldest is very intelligent too, he gets amazing results at school but he lacks other skills eg social ones, maybe he spent to much time around adults when he was younger and not enough time with kids his own age

my youngest, not so bright! but could climb up everest to reach food. so all kids excell at something

I think the lady that keeps writing on here is being quite rude every mom I know is proud of there kids but she seems sure she has got it right and others are wrong I suppose time will tell