MN Little Italy 21

[BananaGio]

Ciao tutte!!

Pippi, we are currently renting a (more or less) 90 sqm flat, so it's 2 bedrooms (a very generous one and a smaller one for the kids), 1 big bathroom, a cucina abitabile and a living room.
It doesn't feel that small as it is a 1920 building, so very high ceilings, huge corridor, etc. We also live quite central, it is a good compromise for us. Surely we were used to a big house in exeter, but fair enough.

Yes, McNulty has never been the top of my list. You are going to love Carver even more in season 4 Sputnik. And Omar.... awwwww enough said

Apparently the wire is Obama's fav show, and Omar his fav character!!!!

I'd ay the "average" flat in Milan is around 120 sqm? More than 140 is deffo classified as big

QUESTION FOR YOU ALL:

How much do you worry about what/how much your dc learn at school in term of literacy and numeracy?

DD1 is happy at school. Seems to learn her letters and numbers and enjoys doing so. I have no idea whether she is the last or the first or whatever among her peers. Should I? On speaking to the teacher I was told what I knew - the above. I didn't ask about her position in the class, should I have done? At home we read the school books once or twice a week plus whatever we like reading. We play teachers sometimes (practicing some letters etc) but only when dd1 asks and because she wants to.

I do not care for her to be the best or to be more advanced than the others etc. She is a late summer baby anyway so in my eyes she is doing brilliantly whatever she does and being happy.

I am asking this because of toxic super pushy acquaintance and toxic thread about criticing teachers and pushing boy to be uber literate at reception.

IMO she is doing well enough to peak to languages, to learn all these things at the little age of 4 rather than 6plus, and to manage to happily be out of the house and not with the family for most of the day.

You seem all so rleaxed and wise and so I'd like to see your pov! What's your take on education? Are people in Italy as obsessed as here?

to speak two

That's not true anymore really Carcetti, house prices in Rome are so crazy now that anything newish and vaguely affordable is pretty small, lots of monolocali, villette which are half underground, or 1 decentish camera and a tiny cameretta. Our apt was built in the 80s and is about 90mq.

I never really worry about it too much unless I read too many threads on MN! Like you the main thing for me at this point is that she is happy and fitting in well with her peers, esp given how things were last year in the Italian school where she was pretty unhappy and didn't really have any friends.

I think she should go up a level with reading though as I think she's finding them too easy so I'll probably ask the teacher about that at parents eve which is soon. We already got them to put her up a level last parents eve.

Pippi, I agree. It seems a bit sad to worry about a child's academic progress in reception! (unless there are very serious problems).
I think your dd is doing extremely well at school, shouldn't reception be all about getting used to routines, how to behave at school, becoming independent with lunch/toilet etc, learning through lots of play and getting familiar with letters?
I did worry when ds was in reception just because I felt they were pressurizing him into reading, and - at 4.5 he just wasn't ready. (I wouldn't have had the same worries re dd, for instance).

Ds is now in seconda elementare. I do have quite a clear picture of his progress, as they bring all the quaderni home every friday, they have homeworks in the weekend etc. I know what the teachers think of him and expect from him. I know that he is very good at math and less good at reading... but I don't really care about "his position" in the class and who's more bravo than he is. I don't think that the majority of parents I chat to are bothered about "charts".
You should worry if child is clearly unhappy or not learning a thing.

Agree with you, it is more about being happy, learning routines, if she into her letters good. Our school doesn't chart, they are very keen to reward effort rather than achievement, and into the idea of fulfilling potential. Tell supertoxic mum to eff off.

Where's Gio? I hope everything is fine at the gio's.

Morning.....

Re: schools....I think that sort of thing is uber-important in Italian schools (cannot believe how PushyCompetitiveMother I have become......"so darling, what exactly did the teacher say to Domenico????") but it's very much played down in the UK. My Mum used to mortify me with her letters to the head, to the papers, to local tv, to Mps bemoaning the fact that we didn't do anything at school, that we didn't have tests, that we weren't pushed enough academically......(I always thanked the lord we had different surnames so no-one knew she belonged to me!) Dd was berated yesterday for not colouring well, and I find myself thinking "oh effing get a grip, no-one in 15 yrs time is going to give my daughter a job on the basis of whether she colours inside the sodding lines or not, and having "coloured" for 3 solid years at nursery, perhaps she's more interested now in actually learning stuff...." (but I bit my tongue....)

Flats.....I tell everyone we live in a cupboard. We have about 85 metres...I went for coffee at lovely Albanian friend's yesterday morning, and she has always said they have a tiny flat but I didn't really believe her.....goodness it makes ours look enormous. I felt like a giant in there....Dp pointed out to me that ours would seem bigger if it was tidier......and we didn't have books all over the place....and Playmobil......which is true enough.....At my friend's there was not a book in sight, or a toy.....She did say below them there is a 100mt flat going for the same rent we pay for ours so we might go and look....

Dp thought he was having a heart attack yesterday so went off to pronto soccorso, but has some kind of inflammation inter-costale....and now I have to organise some x rays or something....

Hope Sui is doing OK? Haven't seen her since last week?

actually i thijnk the charting is important in some schools,not in ours though.
friend who has dc in private school has been told her kid is at the bottom of the class...she is thinking of moving her dd, becasue she has realised that she cannot keep up with the work and does not want her to spend her time at the bottom of the class, very academic pushy school which likes to wean out the weak ones...
Having said this, in our school the kids are split in groups for teachijng and get differentiated homework, easy to work out which ones are the strong and weak groups. Not sure how else you can teach kids who obviously learn at different speed. Lots of movement between groups.

Oh, of course, private schools raison d'etre I think are tables and charts and leagues...

I work in a private girls' school in the summer and was talking to a parent who said they all spend the whole academic year terrified that their children are simply going to be asked to leave. They get brilliant results not only because, but as a contributing factor, because if the kids don't make the brilliant benchmark they have to leave!

So basically it is not so much that the school is brilliant, it is that they only have brilliant kids, no special needs, kids who struggle a bit...Bah!

Exactly.
Totally wrong.......and when you think about it, that in the UK (AFAIK) teachers at private schools don't even need teaching qualifications....and are less well-paid than in the state sector.....it seems to imply that it's not so much that the teaching is top notch, but that any child who isn't going to make it under their own steam gets outed straightaway......

Ok, i know it is a very unfeminist thing to say, but I wish I could have a whole week, maybe month, or year? at home, with no work AT ALL, no cleaning, wiping, comforting, volunteering, cooking, admin house work, chasing people, diy, grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. I just want to sit or possibly lie in my bed reading, drinking tea, whilst a fat bank account with money earned by somebody else, pays for everything I want. I just want a break and be a lady of total leisure, doing exercise, the hairdresser, trip to Lyberty, nice magazines.
Back to reality, now.

Yes, I'd love a few days of total lack of responsibility. Getting drunk with Bunk and McNulty... Shopping at Liberty's... seducing Omar... sunbathing with a good book... eating when I want and possibly don't even contemplate cooking...

Cooking. Aren't you all bored of cooking? Of actually thinking what to cook? I'm making pasta al forno tonight

Oh schools can't think about it now I go out in a sweat just worrying about it !
Houses I hate living in such a small space as I used to have lots and lots of space , my own room , garden , play area etc ..Circumstances change and hey ho- We will still be here unless the bank gets a firework up the backside we are just waiting on them oh why do things take so long in Italy?

Yes I really wish we had a garden here, or even a decent terrace.
I agree with Franca, it's the reponsibility of deciding what to cook, getting it, making it etc, really wears me down sometimes and takes the fun out of something I would otherwise enjoy.

Oh btw Franca, season 4 arrived, along with my Boden parcel. You can imagine the excitement!

What's in the Boden parcel????? Ours arrived on Saturday. Don't like the big flower dress and dd denies ever liking it but she definitely put a cross in the catalogue. It looks like one of those overall things the MIL wears. Might ebay it.

Couple of pairs of shorts and a t-shirt with sunglasses-wearing shark for DS. T-shirt with Vespa, cut off shorts with embroidered rainbow and this in red for DD.

You could post the dress back, no? Postage for something light would be no more than 2.50 probably and you don't have to pay postage on the replacement.

What else you got? (reciprocal nose)

A boden parcel and a wire dvd would actually make my day .

I've got to say that I really haven't noticed much competitive parenting at school. What gets on my nose are those ever moaning mothers... "My lorenzo doesn't eat" "Troppi compiti" or "not enough compiti" or " he has a bit of temperature" and bla bla bla. Boring and precious.

I can't usually be faffed to send stuff back. Our parcel was the daisy swimsuit, big daisy t-shirt, strawberry t-shirt dress, fish double layer t shirt, plain stripey purple t-shirt, blue jogging trousers.....

Am having an arrrrrrgh afternoon. Dd forgot textbooks for 3rd day in a row and have just been on phone for half an hour trying to locate a Mum who can read instructions over phone to me to at least try and do h/w without book. Am scared to face teacher again with no h/w. Dd is tired and stressed and bawling now about how she is the "piu peggio nel mondo".

Quick note (check the time of posting and you will understand why) to thank you for your messages over the last few days. Since DH has returned to work life is too hectic to do anything else than care for DS, and once DH comes home I can hardly leave him to come and play on MN- hence the silence.

Life has improved somewhat, in that the baby blues have gone, but still having lots of problems with breast-feeding (sore nipples, then thrush, which had healed until I latched him on again on Monday, now thrush again, plus cracked nipples): the reason I have been up for the past 2 hours is that I have just expressed so DS has milk for his next feed. Expressing full-time (which is what I have been doing for the last 36 hours) and caring full time for a newborn is almost impossible, esp when he does not sleep much during the day (feeds every three hours, expressing takes about 1 hour, feeding /burping 45 mins, changing another 10- and he feeds every 2.5 hours during the day at the moment)- hence the complete silence. And expressing when the baby is awake is quite tricky... Anyway, still pushing on with it- I guess there are advantages to being fairly stubborn...

Anyway, in-laws are here for a few hours on Wed, so may be able to post again, or at least catch-up on the thread, while I pump during the day.

Glad to hear things are a little better SG, sounds really gruelling though, kudos to you for sticking with it. Did DS not get treated for the thrush too? You both have to take treatment or you'll pass it back and forth. Sorry if you knew this but GPs tend to be pretty clueless about thrush IMO and having read others on here.
What really helped me when I had it was totally cutting out all sugars and refined carbs, and I so wish I had known that before, ie when I was pg and suffering recurently.
Take care.