It's all gone wrong.

[ThanksForSpoilingIt]

I was thinking only yesterday wht a great substitute Mumsnet was for the social aspects of work which I no longer have access to.

Here I could have a chat, offer advice on a range of things from parenting to shopping whilst detouring through War. I could have a "drink" with friends without getting hungover and without consuming and empty calories. I could learn about Downs, Aspergers and Autism. Watch people go through the rollercoaster of IVF and come out the otherside. I could rejoice in the successes of other people's children, commiserate and comfort when things weren't quite so rosy.

Not, it would seem, any longer. I was happy to disagree vehemently with other people on hot threads and back those same people up on others. I was happy to ignore threads that held no interest to me and those I found offensive without feeling the need to jump on the people who were enjoying them. It's not a cosy substitute for "real" friends, "real" chat and "real" gossip any more. It sems we can't have fun without having to think twice and then twice again about whether someone might find it offensive, if it might make them uneasy, if they might not enjoy it... I look after the wellbeing of two small people in my day to day life. I don't need to be worrying about whether I'm keeping everyone here happy as well.

Hi Willow2, where u been?

Went to Waitrose in Sheen to stalk you the other day but didn't know what u looked like so failed dismally.

custardo hugs

For my part, any flounce comments were just jokey (obviously in poor taste, but I didn't think anyone would take them to heart!) - on several of the message boards I belong to when things get a bit heavy, light hearted jokes about who can do the best flounce out the door usually abound to lighten the mood.

Transfering that sort of humour on to here was obviously a poor move on my part, sorry!

I think this is a case in point of how it's easy to forget that there are real people with real emotions at the other side of the keyboard. I really should read my own advice posts some times!

Did I say you posted too much? Good for you for having the time is all I can say. Sorry if I sounded condescending, obviously I don't know your particular red flags.

And I really don't think anyone is trying to stop you saying your bit, we just all want you to be happy when you say it and not so cross you upset other people too and it all gets out of control.

I really really don't want to get into an argument with you because you are damn scary when you are in full flood. But my policy over the last few weeks has been to avoid posting where I thought I might upset someone, but I'm concerned this is meaning I basically never get to post at all these days! So was trying my best to get things back on an even keel again.

Custy I'm not picking on you.... far from it. And I'm sorry you feel that way, that's not what I'm all about.
Not that long ago I was where you are now, feeling bullied, irrationally upset by people I don't even know! Don't know why it hurts it just does. I said this last time and you accused me of being a drama queen! That's whats bugged me this time.

Did you see my post about the dream I had about you??

hag

sorry, needless to say I was trying to have personal conversation with M2T, here, but you lot all got in between.

Custy, hugs and take care.

SamboM - stuck at home, I'd say come over for a cuppa but then i might be accused of turning this thread in to a chat one which would apparently be hypocritical because I talked about free speach earlier in another thread in order to try to defend everyone's right to say what they think, nicely

Are you confused? I certainly am (but that could be the booze) and I've been posting for 245 years. (Which makes me a cliquey old hag obviously - but then I can't be cos I natter to you and you're a "newbie". Anyway, am frantically packing to go on hols, by time I return hopefully everyone (and by that I mean everyone) will have chilled out a bit. Be nice to hook up in couple of weeks though if you fancy it.

Right, off to make space for my brain to explode.

Philippat - I should have put a smiley face after that comment about my numerous posts intimidating people... I was joking. I wasn't offended, so here is a belated wink...

Custy, I'm so sorry you feel this way, I feel so angry on your behalf! You are the nicest person I could ever wish to know, and if only other people knew you like I do they would never say a bad word about you. It has gotten out of hand and you are being picked on, which makes my blood boil! Take a break mate, you don't need this right now. Come back when it's all calmed down. I'm sending you a great big hug right now too, if I could get over to your house I would - with a bottle of wine!

I think you are great and so do a lot of other people on here. None of your posts have been offensive, you have always been fair. Don't let a couple of people get you down, you have many more friends than enemies. Mumsnet will have lost a great voice of reason if you go, plus your sense of humour and great take on life. No-one's gonna run you out of town without my say so matey! Wish I could do more.

Oh dear, hope this is not out of order talking to each other like this.

Will start new thread for a conversation as don't want to be accused of interrupting a "private" conversation (try the phone dear, this is a public forum)

Brilliant!

Willow2 - enjoy your holiday.

Ta v much M2T

M2T please post on the right thread, there is a special one to wish Willow2 a happy holiday. Honestly, get a grip girl!

See, bloody newbie, doesn't know the ropes.

Sorry guys.... grip gotten.

This all seems such a lather about not that much. It is such a shame that some of you are so upset. Feel particularly sorry for Custardo - hate to think of you sobbing because of Mumsnet.
Come on everyone, Mumsnet has so much to offer and we all have far too much going on in our lives to worry about whether or not there is a special place on Mumsnet for chat threads etc.
As far as I can tell, we all love Mumsnet, so lets just enjoy it and make the most of all the kindness, humour and support that so many have to offer.

I feel quite bad that Custy is so upset, yet others are still cracking jokes like the cat that got the cream. No "sorry"'s but an almost pride in a job well done. Can't be doing with it anymore. Sorry Custy old mate. xxx

s'cuse me Rhubarb, but I posted specifically to Custy.... and I apologies for the sh*t stirring comment.... check out the facts.

Yeah, but check out the other threads where you've been just as horrible.

When I was VERY upset after a verbal attack from a number of mumsnetters, Custy told me to get a grip, don't be so dramatic, it's only the internet, and if I was one of her children she'd have slapped me! So is that ok, but what I've said isn't?

I have nothing against Custy... I like her straight to the poitn attitude, but that was nasty.

I apologised for the things that I feel were out of order. It can't be one rule for one and one for the rest.

Custardo, please don't cry. I know how horrible it can feel when things get out of hand on here - more horrible than in real life, somehow. I've lost sleep over Mumsnet in the past and got upset. It's not worth it - we are none of us real, just figments of your computer (Rhubarb excepted, of course). I agree with you on so many things - esp at mo - (and disagree fiercely on others, but hey, that's me, I'm obnoxious like that). I really hope you read this and feel a bit defended. I am still giggling about you rushing off to buy locks and chains for your kid's doors - one thing you do NOT have is a sense of humour problem.

Sorry Rhubarb. Sorry Custy, I didn't realise how upset you were. Apologies for being flip, was just trying to lighten things up. Should have read the whole thread first, that's me all over I'm afraid, good at putting my size 7 in it.

I would just like to say that I too find mumsnet a great source of friendship but I do refuse to let myself get het up by other posts as I don't see the point of arguing with someone I have never met! I will prob eat my words one day when I'm feeling really low and wound up.

Big hugs to you Custy

Hope you are still here when I get back Custy xx