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welcome to "the mums arms"happy hour

513 replies

whymummy · 14/05/2003 12:58

yes,what can i get you love??

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Ghosty · 18/05/2003 23:29

Poor you SB ... here have one on me ...no - I insist!
That sort of thing really get me too ... I hate it ... I think washing machines and other appliances actually have brains and they decide to get you just when you least need it.

whymummy · 18/05/2003 23:31

oh no,what a disaster,you really need a drink,here`s a double!just before xmas i had no washing machine for 2 weeks and in the meantime the children decided to be sick everywhere bed,sofa etc and ds also had headlice so i had to do all the bedding,cushion covers,throws etc by hand and it was back breaking,do you have a launderette near you?

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morocco · 18/05/2003 23:35

hello all
sorry to hear about washing machine woes - I called the plumber out at great cost this week and it took him about a second to remover one of ds s socks all mangled and torn from the back of the machine - I was v p*ed off having to pay up!
Wel we're a bit stressed out here - don't know why really as I know everything is fine etc but you know how it is - worry worry;

sb34 · 18/05/2003 23:36

Message withdrawn

Ghosty · 18/05/2003 23:38

Morrocco ... it must be quite hard for you at the moment ... do you want a drink? ... a virtual one of course ... are they strict about alcohol in Morrocco?

whymummy · 18/05/2003 23:40

hi morocco,just seen your message about going there thanks

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Ghosty · 18/05/2003 23:44

SB ... can you cancel the tea date? Are you going to be without a washing machine until next weekend? It just doesn't bear thinking about!!
Here have another double ...

sb34 · 18/05/2003 23:46

Message withdrawn

whymummy · 18/05/2003 23:46

hey ghosty,what are you drinking?i`m on water today as i have a big hangover thanks to meanmum that dragged me from the house to the pubs last night

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sb34 · 18/05/2003 23:48

Message withdrawn

sb34 · 18/05/2003 23:49

Message withdrawn

morocco · 18/05/2003 23:51

mmm double baileys please
now a bit nervous about going out drinking as these seem to be the targets so maybe virtual drink will be OK? (looks shiftily sideways)
need cheering up - anyone know any good jokes? or more worst mother stories?
btw hand washing tip - put them all in the bath and get kids to jump up and down on them for a bit to get them clean

whymummy · 18/05/2003 23:54

morocco were there any warnings or are you as surprised as everyone else?
here`s your bayleys

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Ghosty · 18/05/2003 23:54

I'll have a vodka lime soda thanks whymummy ...
Morrocco ... I am just off to check my e-mails for some jokes for you ... back in a mo!

whymummy · 18/05/2003 23:57

there you are ghosty,enjoy it!!

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morocco · 18/05/2003 23:58

that double baileys is doing the trick!
no warnings as such but we're not totally surprised either - well tbh didn't expect suicide bombs and also targets seem v weird choice - a bit worrying as we seem higher up on terrorist hit list than those ones actually hit ( work for UK cultural:teaching centre)
oh well (long sigh)
but are getting more time off work which can only be a bonus??

Ghosty · 19/05/2003 00:01

How's this? Hope you are not offended by blonde jokes ...
A blonde and a lawyer are seated next to each other on a flight from LA to NY. The lawyer asks if she would like to play a fun game? The blonde, tired, just wants to take a nap, politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The lawyer persists and
explains that the game is easy and a lot of fun. He explains, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5.00, and vise versa. "Again, she declines and tries to get some sleep. The lawyer, now agitated, says, "Okay, if you don't know the answer you pay me $5.00, and if I don't know the answer, I will pay you $500.00." This catches the blonde's attention and, figuring there will be no end to this torment unless she plays, agrees to the game.
The lawyer asks the first question. "What's the distance from the earth to the moon?" The blonde doesn't say a word, reaches into her purse, pulls out a $5.00 bill and hands it to the lawyer.
Okay says the lawyer, your turn. She asks the lawyer, "What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four legs?" The lawyer, puzzled, takes out his laptop computer and searches all his references, no answer. He taps into the air phone with his modem and searches the net and the library of congress, no answer. Frustrated,
he sends e-mails to all his friends and coworkers, to no avail. After an hour, he wakes the blonde, and hands her $500.00. The blonde says, "Thank you," and turns back to get some more sleep.
The lawyer, who is more than a little miffed, wakes the blonde and asks, "Well, what's the answer? "
Without a word, the blonde reaches into her purse, hands the lawyer $5.00, and goes back to sleep.

whymummy · 19/05/2003 00:05

whats tbh morocco,im a bit slow with the abbreviations

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morocco · 19/05/2003 00:07

can't do grinning face but lots of smileys

Ghosty · 19/05/2003 00:08

To Be Honest

whymummy · 19/05/2003 00:09

ghosty

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morocco · 19/05/2003 00:11

hi whymummy
sorry - probably invented it myself as I'm v crap at all these abbreviations but I thought it was 'to be honest' - put it in a stupid place too I notice - did you think it was a variation on dh dp - maybe 'terribly boring husband'?

whymummy · 19/05/2003 00:17

this is a true story from usa
a girl sat in her car outside a supermarket looking very shocked and with her hands over her head a man approched the car and ask her what was wrong she said that she`d been shot in the head and that she was holding her brain the man phoned an ambulance the paramedics had to break into the car as she was to terrified to move her hands from her head and they discovered that a cake had exploded in the back of the car and what she thought was her brain was just part of the cake stucked to her head,hee hee,hee
and yes she was blonde

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whymummy · 19/05/2003 00:18

i thought it meant "the bloody husband"

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morocco · 19/05/2003 00:25

gotta go girls - thanks for the uplift and the drinks
will slowly stagger home again
whymummy