Alcohol free home having guests

55 replies

Egh443 · 25/03/2023 18:41

My house is an alcohol free home I don’t allow alcohol or people who have been drinking into my house for personal reasons. I live with my partner and our son. My MIL is staying over soon and knows my feelings towards alcohol the day she is staying at ours she is going out for a meal with her friends which will involve drinking. Had I known this before she would not have been invited to stay at my home. I don’t want her coming into my home having consumed alcohol or holding my son. She lives abroad and doesn’t see us often I thought it would be safe to have her here as she was meant to be spending time with my son and partner while she was here as she’s only here 2 days I don’t know what to do.

OP posts:

ChocSaltyBalls · 25/03/2023 23:15

BillyNoM8s · 25/03/2023 19:07

Depends. If it's because you or your husband are recovering alcoholics, then she should respect your wishes, including not turning up inebriated.

If I went out and had a beer with my dinner, you wouldn't be able to tell though. If it's undetectable, I don't really see how it's any of your business.

This

if she’s only had one or two glasses of wine she’s hardly going to be a danger to hold your son FGS.

I don’t drink alcohol either but you do sound a bit over the top OP.

usernamechanged1 · 25/03/2023 23:18

saraclara · 25/03/2023 23:09

It's also her husband's home, and his mother has travelled from abroad to see him/

This is absolutely ridiculous. MIL is going out for dinner and presumably having a glass of wine with it. That is NO reason to ban her from the home in this situation.

I don't know how OP found out that MIL intended having a drink with dinner, but had she not, she'd have had no idea that her visitor had had a glass of wine with a meal. You simply cannot tell.

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I’m picturing a breathalyser station in her hall.

SunshineGeorgie · 26/03/2023 00:24

So how long after consuming alcohol until she's allowed in? I mean, if it's 12 hours can't she come in after 11 and a half hours.....how rigid are you op?

What about foods containing alcohol?

NoSweat · 26/03/2023 03:07

Everyone on this thread can come on and tell you want they would do but that's no help whatsoever to you.

Only you know your reasons and how important they are to you. Only you can make the choice. Compromise on your ideals or risk alienating MIL. It's not a right or wrong. Assuming there is a DH/ joint home owner, it's a decision for the two of you. Could you take the children elsewhere that night? Not that you should have to, but there are options to consider that might test where your strength of feeling lies.

BigChesterDraws · 26/03/2023 12:04

I understand the “no alcohol in the house” rule but not allowing people into the house who have consumed alcohol is ridiculous. How much time most pass before they can enter? If I had a beer on Saturday, would I able to cross your threshold on Wednesday? If your boyfriend’s mother is going to lunch and will have a drink, by the time she gets back to your house there will be as good as no alcohol in her body. It is possible to drink alcohol without becoming drunk. Most reasonable adults can manage to do this. Your boyfriend’s mother probably can too..

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