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Original poster

Am I unusual in being the only mum who had babies in their 20s?

147 replies

bobsmum · 28/03/2007 15:09

Feel like it round here.

Ds has just enrolled for primary school and some of the future P1 mums have met up a few times. I am officially the "baby" of the bunch at 30!!

Here am I thinking I'm way too old to have another baby and everyone else in my area seems to have started their families at least 10 years later than me.

It's all either teenage pgs or 40 somethings and I'm feeling a little out on a limb at playgroup etc.

Anyone else in a similar situation?

OP posts:
MerlinsBeard · 28/03/2007 15:11

not here no. I had both mine in early 20's (am only 25 now) mixture of all ages at the school gates and everyone treated equally too which is refreshing

lulumama · 28/03/2007 15:12

i had DS when i was 24, so am the youngest mum in my group and certainly in DSs class....

had DD just after i was 30,so will be 34 when she starts school, and DS will be in year 5

TBH, it does not make a jot of difference in terms of friendships with other mums, as having children of the same age is a great leveller, you all have something in common !

just get stuck in and say hi !

southeastastra · 28/03/2007 15:17

i had my first son at 23 and my second at 31, but agree with lulumama don't worry

Original poster
bobsmum · 28/03/2007 15:19

It's not that I don't get on well with the other mums. I do . They're all really nice. But we have nothing in common socially and I was hoping to have found a few friends to go out with in an evening.

There are 2 other mums from playgroup closer to my age who I'm quite close to and see fairly often, but it's the school thing I'm a bit surprised at. It's a small school and the parents get together very often. Our circumstances are very different - most have either lost their elderly parents or are looking after them (is that the tweenie generation thing?).

Of course I sympathise, but I feel so out of my depth in conversations and very very immature. I'm worried I'll be left out of the loop after a while.

OP posts:
IdrisTheDragon · 28/03/2007 15:19

I had DS when I was 28 and DD when I was 30 (and 12 days)

rantinghousewife · 28/03/2007 15:19

No, good company here, I had my first at 21 and my second at 31. I did used to be the youngest mum out of all my ds's peers tho'. And the only single parent and the only full timer aswell!!

Eddas · 28/03/2007 15:19

Well i'm 28 and just about to have my 2nd baby. First was when i was 26. It depends where i am as to how old/young i feel.

At dd's preschool, i do feel very young, i think looking about 19 doesn't help!!!I'd imagine it depends where you live though as dd's preschool is rural and doubt many teenage/20's mums could live there, not meaning to sound stuck up or snobby, just my opinion.

Also, felt quite young in the ward when i had dd and at the antenatal classes too. My aunt had her first at 26 23 years ago and said she felt like an OAP on the ward. lol/ Things have changed a lot!!!!!

When i walk around my local town i feel quite old as there are a lot of teenage and young mums around.

Also a lot of my school friends do not have children so they'll likely be in their 30's having them whilst i'm the mother of secondary school children, scary!!!!

rantinghousewife · 28/03/2007 15:20

By that I meant full time work.

IdrisTheDragon · 28/03/2007 15:20

I know a group of mums with children around DS's age and I think I'm the 3rd youngest (out of 10). But I don't really notice much difference in how any of us are - ages range from about 28 to 43 I think.

FioFio · 28/03/2007 15:22

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lulumama · 28/03/2007 15:22

am glad had the DCs younger, means that when they are both at school i am plenty young enough to get started on a career or retraining, not worrying about when to have my children.....it is what works best, i met my DH when i was 21, was at university, so no dilemma re giving up a house or career, so getting married and cracking on with having DS was not an issue...whereas as other mums have concentrated on getting established in their chosen fields, and have career paths to get back to

hunkermunker · 28/03/2007 15:23

You're the only person who's ever had a baby in their 20s, yes.

mytwopenceworth · 28/03/2007 15:23

i had ds1 at erm, 25 and ds2 at 26.

i considered myself an older mum at the time, but then i did grow up in a place where if you were still childless at 18 you'd left it a bit late!

rantinghousewife · 28/03/2007 15:24

The upside is that, when you reveal to people that you have a 13 year old and they look shocked. It kinda makes you feel good!!

Socci · 28/03/2007 15:24

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rantinghousewife · 28/03/2007 15:25

Although that huddle thing that all the other mums do in the playground used to get right up my nose, I will admit!!

MrsBadger · 28/03/2007 15:27

ooh, we did this in the spring of last year, where are my stats...

First thread:
mums surveyed: 366
average age at birth of first child: 27.5

Second thread:
mums surveyed: 122 (less people posted)
average age at birth of first child if planned pg: 27.3
average age at birth of first child if unplanned pg: 22.3

pinkchampagne · 28/03/2007 15:27

I was 3 weeks away from 27th birthday when I had DS1 & 30 when I had DS2.

Original poster
bobsmum · 28/03/2007 15:30

MrsB - that's interesting - kind of matches up with the national average I think?

Bizarrely felt like a pensioner in my post natal ward at 28 with dd...

OP posts:
MrsBadger · 28/03/2007 15:32

yes it did - gave a pretty good smooth bell curve too

depends on your area - here there seems to be a huge gulf between the 30-somethings and the early-20s with not a lot in between...

lucyellensmum · 28/03/2007 15:47

I had my first child when i was 19, felt like a gymslip mum, had my second when i was 35 now i feel like a granny

colditz · 28/03/2007 15:49

I did too.

I feel a bit young sometimes - at other times I feel quite old!

zippitippitoes · 28/03/2007 15:49

does it depend on house prices in an area?

FioFio · 28/03/2007 15:50

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FioFio · 28/03/2007 15:51

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