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Original poster

Am I unusual in being the only mum who had babies in their 20s?

147 replies

bobsmum · 28/03/2007 15:09

Feel like it round here.

Ds has just enrolled for primary school and some of the future P1 mums have met up a few times. I am officially the "baby" of the bunch at 30!!

Here am I thinking I'm way too old to have another baby and everyone else in my area seems to have started their families at least 10 years later than me.

It's all either teenage pgs or 40 somethings and I'm feeling a little out on a limb at playgroup etc.

Anyone else in a similar situation?

OP posts:
DimpledThighs · 28/03/2007 18:07

FioFio - f*&k! are you still around - I love you and was no way calling you common - please say you were joking!

FioFio · 28/03/2007 18:08

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Original poster
bobsmum · 28/03/2007 18:09

The reason I started this thread is that I was wondering whether there was a growing trend (there's that word again) to tacitly condemn women for chossing to have babies "young". Teen pregnancies tend to be unplanned and many many many more women are having babies at 35 plus. This leaves the twenty somethings as the oddity surely. Hence my question. Is is only me that's finding they're in a minority or are there others out there.

Gingerbear- there may6 be 20,000 members but I guarantee you that less than 5000 or so post regularly. But, yes, as I can see from this thread there are^ other people in a a similar situation to me, so starting this thread has prhaps gone a little way to answering my question. Which is why I did it. Using a forum will bring all sorts of opinions out of the woodwork.

OP posts:
FioFio · 28/03/2007 18:09

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Original poster
bobsmum · 28/03/2007 18:09

choosing

OP posts:
DimpledThighs · 28/03/2007 18:32

when I was pregnany at 25 countless people asked me if it was an accident or even said they "admired" me for going through with the pregnancy.

My sister had her first baby at 31 - no one asked her anything like this.

Original poster
bobsmum · 28/03/2007 18:39

DT - similar I think. When I had a m/c at 25, people mainly said it was good I was so young so could try again. Then the first question the GP and receptionist asked when I did get pg with ds was "do you want to keep it?" No congrats, nothing, just sheer disbelief that someone in their mid 20s might plan to have a child.

OP posts:
Original poster
bobsmum · 28/03/2007 18:40

What I mean about the response to my m/c is that it seemed to be irrelevant that this was a very much wanted baby, and that because I was "young" it could be quickly forgotten and replaced. That was very hard to deal with at the time.

OP posts:
hoxtonchick · 28/03/2007 18:49

i was 26 when i had ds, & just 30 when i had dd. i'm still waiting for my contemporaries from school/university to catch me up (i'm almost 32 now) though they're beginning to.

i am so pleased i had my children when i did. i have worked part-time since having them so my career is still pretty much on track whilst still being flexible enough to allow me to do all the school pick ups etc.

hope i don't sound too smug....

giraffeski · 28/03/2007 18:50

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CarrotAteAllTheEggs · 28/03/2007 18:50

One 'friend', when I told her I was pregnant at 19, said she thought she's try to starve it out I was actually quite pleased

CarrotAteAllTheEggs · 28/03/2007 18:51

In fact she's still extraordinarily thin ten years later, a bit like that girl in Skins. 'Wow'

WinnieThePooh · 28/03/2007 18:58

Not read all the messages, but just want to add that although I was 32 before I had my daughter (5 in Agust) I have a friend of 25 who has 2 sons 10 months apart.

mamatres · 28/03/2007 19:04

i had ds1 when i was 23 (the day before- worst bloody birthdayi have ever had- all day in labour!). he is now 8.
actually at his old school i was one of the older mums! now he is at private school and i am the youngest spring chicken at the gates!

shouldbe · 28/03/2007 19:09

I was 26 when I had dd and 29 when I had ds. There's been a spate of 40th birthdays amongst other parents in dd's class at school so this would suggest I'm the baby of the bunch by almost 10 years.

Scotia · 28/03/2007 19:10

I had babies in my teens, twenties and late thirties, and am currently considering doing it again in my forties!

How's that for unusual!

Scotia · 28/03/2007 19:12

Meant to add - I used to be the youngest mum at the school gate, now I'm one of the oldest at the playgroup.

PeachyClair · 28/03/2007 19:29

Would say- ds1 /2 / 3 pg's happened on command. At 33, same isnt seeming to be the case.

Glad I had them early, I could live without a no4 of course, but wold have hated to be childless.

eviletc · 28/03/2007 19:37

ds is nearly 8, dd1 nearly 5 and dd2 nearly 1. i am 26. am def the only one as far as i am aware under 30 in the playground for ds at least!

only skim read thread but would agree age DOES make a difference - although i have a mortgage, a car and a house doesn't mean i want to TALK about them!

i want to talk about shaun the sheep

GreenandBlackOtter · 28/03/2007 19:39

i had my first at 24 and i felt bloody young
still having them at 39 though!!

kama · 28/03/2007 21:11

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recoveringmum · 28/03/2007 21:16

havent had time to read the thread but can say that have two and am in my twenties and hope to have four before thirty and then stop.

Greenleeves · 28/03/2007 21:17

I've got two and I'm still just about in my twenties

recoveringmum · 28/03/2007 21:19

reading the thread i dont know if its age, as some people are young and act very old, but i definately did everything i could to stay my age while having children, from taking dd1 to parties and conferences alike, to carying in a sling and leaving the buggy behind and so on

Greenleeves · 28/03/2007 21:20

I am one of those who is young-ish but acts very old