Gin and a moat

[paxillin]

Not by one of the Queens this time... But we can drink here.

Okay.

Where's them mole-rats? < manhandles large bucket of DNA onto the table; some slops onto the surface; table dissolves>

I'm doing "O" level biology at night class, and our homework is to create life. I could have used the leg fish, but they've all been immolated. So I'm going to splice some of their crispy genes what I've filtered out of the ashes with those of the humble mole-rat to create legmolefish.

I'll take the "rat" bit out 'cos some people are a bit squeamish about rats, just because they are filthy, aggressive, vicious, destructive, disease-carrying vermin - talk about speciesist! Still, you can't fight unreasoning prejudice.

Is that gin? I don't mind if do!

Very nice! Compares favourably to a Welsh cognac. Mortificado is really putting itself on the map with regard to bathtub moonshine fine drinking and dining.

It's imported. If you dissolve the mole rats we won't get a pool!! Can I have the first ratless mole rat though? It could be the next designer pet!

I'm doing "O" level biology at night class, and our homework is to create life.

T'other princess could teach you how to 'create life'. As a 'pope' you may have got the wrong idea of how to go about it.

Stay away from my strawberries! I'm going to breed them and create a variant of the pineberry that has a flavour.

GERONIMOOOO!

is the pool even ready yet or did you just cover me in mole rat wee?

Iced water plus the buckets of sweat coming off me.

Ooh, maybe my hair will get salt waves.

My designer rattles mole rats won't wee, wee, Chardonnay - they will tinkle Prosecco, so you will have to train them to go in a glass.

Actually, if I leave the "fish" bit in, they could live in the glass couldn't they?

Do you have a Home Office License and ethical approval for your project, Happy? I will otherwise continue to virkon any bucket full of biohazard I find.

Unfortunately, I'm not sure popes, even fake ones, think they need anyone else's ethical approval for anything. Is there anything scriptural to throw at her to make her desist from these dubious experiments?(if necessary, I can simply drop the book on her from a great height but I'd prefer a non-violent solution)

I tell you, virkon works every time. Just need to make sure nobody thinks it's a lovely pink foamy cocktail and necks it.

If you're ordering laboratory supplies, can't you just get a few winchesters of spectroscopic ethanol ?

Could do, but I'm not sure we have the necessary tax exemption. Perhaps Happy's project should go ahead, it would allow us to order tax free ethanol for research purposes.

Winchesters and ethanol. This sounds like a party I am going to.

Could do, but I'm not sure we have the necessary tax exemption

Uh...can't you just ask your mater? But I didn't think Mortificado worried too much about that sort of thing - afaik taxation here is just a matter of me giving the peasants a hard stare once a quarter and see what they cough up.

Do you have a Home Office License and ethical approval for your project, Happy?

Er - yes. Yes, Pax.

Of course I do.

Most certainly.

Yes.

Too hot for science and regulations now, breed what you want.

I am training for the Dive Bombing Olympics. BANZAI!

And yes, booze tax is collected by the Queen, but since she incinerated her crown she needs money.

Look - do you want these artless rats or not. They can go in your handbag and pee prosecco. Can't say fairer than that.

And what the Home Office doesn't know won't hurt it. (I might hurt anyone who enlightens the Home Office, though - so be warned!)

Ethics and morals and that sort of stuff is the business of a Pope, and although you can take the girl out of the Pope, you can't take the Pope out of . . . actually, I'll have to think of a way to re-phrase that.

*ratless rats, not artless - though artless rats sound quite attractive in a stinking vermin sort of way.

Prosecco at 37 degrees? Or are you breeding them with a bladder fridge?

Bladder fridge . . . hmmmmmmm

Bored. Been given a bottle of detox bath stuff. Wonder if I look poisonous to my RL friends? Or perhaps just smelly .