Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Other subjects
Original poster

Is there a website where you can get advice on parenting?

177 replies

disillusioned · 04/03/2007 18:06

I know, I probably sound sarcastic. It just all seems so different these days. Unless you are a well known prolific poster or you are posting about something really unusual or outrageous, people just aren't interested.

You only need to look at some of the topics and you can see that posters who have concerns about their kids, parenting etc only get a few replies. Yet ask about sex toys, what's for dinner and baby names and you're inundated with replies.

When I joined MN I was amazed at the replies you would get when you started a thread, it seemed that people were genuinely interested. Nowadays, there are umpteen unanswered threads and it all seems more superficial.

I know there are times when everyone comes together eg the christmas pressie thing, but on a day to day basis no one really cares anymore.

Btw, I've just changed my name as I've just noticed a thread when someone was moaning about my name being similar to theirs. Will be sticking with this from now on.

OP posts:
FrannyandZooey · 04/03/2007 20:44

I am buggered if I am typing disillusioned each time

it took me about a minute just to do it once, there

Greensleeves · 04/03/2007 20:45

Yes, but Franny I considered starting a thread like this, if I had done I might have namechanged for the same reasons as disillusioned (but I didn't even have the bottle to do that!)

I haven't said much really, just piggybacked some feelings of mine onto this thread to try and illustrate that I understand (I think) where she is coming from and why she feels aggrieved. I think the tone of her posts is quite sad and not at all aggressive - I could identify with it quite easily, and I don't know who she is either.

FrannyandZooey · 04/03/2007 20:48

oh, but, aaargh - if you had started the thread and now namechanged I would have known that you were feeling sad and not cross

probably

aargh. I am glad you understand Dis and can offer her support. I think she has made life hard for herself with this thread. I hope it can develop into being more constructive for her.

FrannyandZooey · 04/03/2007 20:50

And are you saying that you think it is more uncaring on here than when you joined, Greeny? That things have changed? Or that you were feeling unloved and uncared for?

Dior · 04/03/2007 20:50

Message withdrawn

foxinsocks · 04/03/2007 20:51

greeny, re the feeling bullied, you know you have a lot of support on that issue

BandofMothers · 04/03/2007 20:52

Thanks Twiglett. , nice to be recognised in the thriving metropolis of MN.

DimpledThighs · 04/03/2007 20:52

Disillusioned - TBH I do think you are being a bit over sensitive where msnet is concerned, but this worries me because it makes me wonder what other kind of support you have - if any. Mumsnet is a resource for me and a bit of fun but I don't take much of it to heart and enjoy teh sarcastic banter - but it sounds like you do not. The thing that struck me most was the way you reacted to HC comment which I read in a completely different light hearted way.

I am not being critical more saying are you sure everything is okay with you because you sound really down - esp. with yourself.

morningpaper · 04/03/2007 20:55

Yeh Bandofmothers I've noticed you

You have a v cool name

BandofMothers · 04/03/2007 20:58

Morningpaper. You have a cool name too. Have heard that you write something called a round up that is usually V amusing. Is it emailed weekly or something, and how do I go about getting it??

zippitippitoes · 04/03/2007 21:02

I think feeling ignored is a risk with posting on a forum

eg i posted on athread this week and was very open about something i thought was relevant to the op that i had experienced and foolishly i thought someone might say something about my post but not one of the following posters picked up on it...I was pretty upset as it was something I had never discussed with anyone abd felt afetr it was kind of belittled by being told and ignored. not that i was belittled but that the experience was now sort of sullied. It was in the context of accepting not having more children by the way so you don't have to guess.

But i can't really say i blame anyone it was just unnoticed and one of those things you can't afford to be sensitivie about..although it's hard.

morningpaper · 04/03/2007 21:05

Bandofmothers there is an option in your Members page I think where you can tick to recieve it

Tis a weekly roundup

Zippi: I know just what you mean, I've sure we've all done that.

LieselVentouse · 04/03/2007 21:09

Would just like to say that Im sorry the OP feels that way cause I persobally have never felt that and Ive witnessed many people with major problems widowed/lost children etc. you are all like a big family and when one suffers you all gather round to help, yes there is some sniping but that happens in all families. Im away to go hug a tree now

BandofMothers · 04/03/2007 21:10

Sometimes when you post at the sameish time as 6 other people your post just gets lost in the thread. Some move so fast it's hard to keep up.
I had a similar exp recently zippi. My dd2 7 mths did something that scared the crap out of me. I was posting in the tea shop at the time. I posted about it and it was totally ignored (she'd wrapped a blanket round her head whilst in bed) which I thought was at least worth a pat on the back, but it was totally ignored, in favour of talking about Lazytown.
I was quite hurt, if the convo had been imp, I wouldn't have felt so sensitive, but Lazytown???
I got over it!!!

BandofMothers · 04/03/2007 21:13

MP, is it the mumsnet news thing I get in my email every friday, or is yours a different one???

grannycrackers · 04/03/2007 21:22

i'm quite new and i've found mn to be very supportive and loads of people have posted on my threads.
BUT some times it does piss me off, when i try and give advice and get ignored, but then it's probably because there are so many posts, or if people already know eachother they are more likely to respond to one another.
and then if someone did ignore me because they didn't like me, then so what? it's their loss.
i thought some posters were being mean to me just a few days ago but i expect it was meant in fun
anyway, a pat on the back for you bandofmothers

morningpaper · 04/03/2007 21:25

Mine is different to the Mumsnet news, which appears on a THURSDAY I think

BandofMothers · 04/03/2007 21:25

Thanks, Gcrackers.

morningpaper · 04/03/2007 21:25

grannycrackers it was meant in fun

I think it was me

BandofMothers · 04/03/2007 21:26

Cool, will sign up then. But it BETTER be funny. . . .

southeastastra · 04/03/2007 21:27

zippitippitoes i know how you feel, but sometimes just writing it down and posting it make you feel a bit better, do you think?

Original poster
disillusioned · 04/03/2007 21:30

Don't know what to say now. Just for the record, i've not been posting on the feeling depressed threads, although I do feel pretty miserable at the moment. If they had a feeling stressed topic, I'm pretty sure I'd be on it all the time.

Thanks for being so nice, I don't think anyone needs to apologise for what they said, you should all post just what you think not pussy foot around because you might have spoken to me in the past. I said what I wanted, although under the anonymity of a new name.

This thread wasn't supposed to be all about me either. It was a general observation that sometimes the important stuff gets overlooked. I remember when chat was introduced and everyone was up in arms about it, I think pretty much everyone gets involved in chat now.

I did say as well that I have had a lot of support from mumsnet and have made friends, several of whom have posted on this thread. I never said I hated the place, I didn't flounce, I'm always bloody lurking. I think MN has become a victim of its own success really, it is so big now it can be more difficult to make yourself heard.

Slightly ashamed that some of you think you might have recognised me, hope I'm not the talk of msn.

OP posts:
Dior · 04/03/2007 21:32

Message withdrawn

pirategirl · 04/03/2007 21:33

I guess that sometimes, and I am speaking from my expereince, we have bad days, and refering to support, not many of us have support around us.

If I am having a bad day, feeling depressed, and i thought my post wasnt of interest I would feel even lower.

Of course, it isnt personal, its just luck of the draw, timing, i can see how someone would be upset.

Its not bad here really is it!! considering how difficult it is to really explain where you are coming from when you only have a bunch of letters at your disposal.

There's no facial expression, no chance to ponder or gauge the other poster's meaning.

See, even I know what i mean in this post but I am too tired and lazy too explain it proper like.

One thing is for sure, we must be good mums to even bother spending all this time when we arenot with our kids, talking about them.!

Original poster
disillusioned · 04/03/2007 21:35

Thanks for your post Greeny, sorry to hear you've been feeling bullied. If nothing else at least my thread gave you an opportunity to get things off your chest.

OP posts:
Swipe left for the next trending thread